Newest Review: ... have yourself the potential for disaster. Earthquakes will destroy your machinery and your reputation so you need to employ decent handyme... more
Doctor attend in psychiatry please?!?
Theme Hospital (PS)
Member Name: doomichelle
Theme Hospital (PS)
Advantages: challenging, comical
Disadvantages: frustrating, repetitive
Available for : Playstation one and Playstation 3 from the Playstation network
Price band: Below £5
Published by: Electronic Arts
Theme Hospital is a game that leaves you in control of running a hospital. Running a hospital into the ground if my experiences are anything to go by. Essentially you start from scratch with an empty hospital and empty plots of land you need to buy in order to expand your wealth. Running a hospital is no easy task and quite often you can find yourself going backwards rather than forwards, floundering in debt in order to expand your diagnosis and treatment facilities by taking out loans from the banker. Of course you could argue that it would be a better idea not to take the loan but with a reception room full of unhappy patients you are left with little choice.
Throw into the mix earthquakes and rats and you have yourself the potential for disaster. Earthquakes will destroy your machinery and your reputation so you need to employ decent handymen to keep on top of them. As for the rats, well the last thing the health inspector wants to see when he visits your hospital is a furry critter running around. My solution is to place a plant pot in front of the rats holes and hope the problem goes away.
There are a variety of conditions which need to be treated in your hospital and as the levels progress you will find that more and more problems crop up with new research needed to unlock treatment facilities. A few of my personal favourites include, Bloaty head syndrome, The king syndrome (elvis impersonators) and Hairytitis cured by a good sharp electrical shock. The irritating thing is that once you start a new level, all of the diagnosis and treatment rooms you previously unlocked will have disappeared and you will have to research them all over again.
Your progress throughout the game is mapped by a league table in which you compete against other hospitals in the area. Do well and you will be rewarded, perform badly and you may see the game over screen coming your way. A progress bar at the top of the screen indicates how well you are doing throughout the year with a traffic light red, amber, green system. If you are in the green you are close to finishing the level, in the red and you have to make serious changes.
As is the goal in most hospital establishments, or so you would hope, the idea is to cure your patients not kill them. This requires that you find the right balance between diagnosis and treatment as a misdiagnosis can lead to death just as easily as no diagnosis at all.
As for staff, those available to buy are doctors, nurses, handymen and receptionists. Throughout the level the receptionist will pipe in with unhelpful gibbering which more than once has caused me to turn the volume down so I can have five minutes of peace. Doctors too seem to have no sense of purpose and wander aimlessly around corridors when the receptionist calls out they are needed elsewhere. Place them in a room with a line full of waiting patients and there is still a chance they will wander out again, causing your patients to walk out in anger. Yet still, they will demand a pay rise for doing no work.
Another problem is that doctors need to have certain qualifications in order to do certain tasks such as surgeons and psychiatrists. Waiting for one to be available to buy can be an absolute nightmare as the generation of staff to buy is completely random.
Despite all of this, theme hospital is a retro game that will keep you going for a long time and is fun, though frustrating to play. At about 2.99 off the playstation network, this is your chance to purchase a game that otherwise would be lost.
Summary: A chance to run your own hospital from the comfort of your sofa