Nine to Five (Decoration Ideas)

Member Name: millwall23

Product:	Decoration Ideas
Date:	06/12/00 (140 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: The end product is stunning

Disadvantages: Takes a lonnggggg longgggggg time

No my title isn’t a Christmas store or some strange code it’s how long it takes me to decorate my Christmas tree!

Here’s my day in the life of a perfectionist tree decorator.

I need to be in the mood so off goes the TV and on goes a selection of music that I can listen to. No not Christmas carols YUCK! But a mix of De la soul (Groove is in the heart), Depeche Mode club remixes, Space (Neighborhood), Stone Roses (Fools Gold) and other such tunes courtesy of Napster.

Out comes the tree and the day begins. I have a fake tree and I love it, because it’s fake it means I can manipulate the branches as needed and I will need to in pursuit of perfection.

The first thing I have to do after assembling the 3 parts is to rearrange the branches to make it look full and realistic. This process involves going through the branches one by one and takes approximately 1-2 hours until it looks just right (it’s a 7ft tree). It seems over the top but it really makes all the difference in the long run.

Next comes the dreaded job – the lights. It takes two sets of 100 lights to cover most of the tree but even then they don’t fit all the way around so I leave a section bare that will become the back. Tucked into the corner it’s not noticeable so it’s not worth investing in even more lights to cover it. I hate wires showing and this is where the flexible branches are a godsend, I manipulate them around the wires and the lights themselves so that when the job is finished it’s extremely hard to see any wires at all. Unfortunately to achieve that it takes a long long time and quite frankly it’s boring. This is where the music comes in as I wiggle my bottom and dance around singing in a way that makes me very grateful none of my friends are around to see me!

The lights take me between 3-5 hours depending how determined I’m feeling that particular year, this year
they took me 4 hours but it actually goes quite quickly. Every branch is evenly layered and after I’ve finished I take about another ½ hour to go round and make sure the branches are looking just right again and all the lights are hidden in the branches. This gives a lovely effect as it slightly dulls the lights and gives them that quality that is almost magical, instead of being a solid bright light they reflect off of the bristles that are around them and glow.

After those two jobs are done it’s quite quick (well in comparison) to finish the job. The baubles are next, I decorate in red and gold mainly and they are evenly spread around the tree, not too many just enough. The chocolates are next – all 150 of them eek! I don’t use the hangers when I put them on the tree, I just slip them over the branches (after tying the annoying knots). This has two advantages, firstly it keeps the length shorter so they dangle rather than sit on the branches and secondly they are far less likely to fall off every time you brush against the tree.

Then the rest of the decorations go on. I try to buy a few special ones every year and my eventual plan is to replace all the chocolates with proper decorations. I normally spend between 20p and £3 on one but they are worth it as they make the tree look very special.

All of that takes me about another 2 hours or so depending on how much time I spend pretending to be a rock star (yep still wiggling that bottom). I can’t stand a tree that is too cluttered so I make sure they are evenly spread and no two decorations are on top of one another, it’s actually easier than it sounds to do.

Nearly there!

It’s just a case of throwing over the red and gold lamenta now and even that has to be done just right. I take a hand full of strands and drag it over so that a few are left behind on each branch. That way you avoid clumps and it hangs just right. On
goes the golden fairy and I’m just about ready to collapse – but it’s done.

And although I may not be the best decorator in the world and living in the middle of nowhere hardly anyone will see it I’m left with the most wonderful satisfaction and a beautiful tree that I can enjoy for the next month.

I expect you are thinking I’m completely insane right about now but my tree is one thing that always looks beautiful and up until now anyone who has seen it has never laughed at me for taking so much time. Time to turn off the music and relax a bit before my daughter comes in and sees it and all that hard work is undone!

Definitely a worthy days work.

Just lastly a quick tip for you. I can't bare the thought of doing the lights every year so what I do is fold up the tree from the bottom up and put brown tape around it to hold it all in place. Next year remove the tape and let the branches come back down and you have a tree ready to decorate with lights already on. All you need to do is re-shape the branches again. When we moved this year we had to cut the lights so I had to do it again but I won't be next year!

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