Paying the price of vanity. (My Experience of Acne)

Name: lulu2004

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Product:	My Experience of Acne
Date:	21/02/04 (812 review reads)
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Advantages: yeah right

Disadvantages: too many to list.

Ok, well i'm going to put an entry in this long forgotten category. It's a subject that's close to my heart and if i can help one other person by telling them my experience then this will have been worthwhile.

I'll start from the start. When i was a teenager i had the most beautiful soft smooth skin. While my friends were battling breakouts of spots and acne, I had absolutely no trouble in that field. I cleansed every night, and for some silly reason i thought that was all that was needed to prevent spots. Although i was never nasty or teased people about their skin, i just couldn't understand why they didn't cleanse at night to clear their skin. I was niave about the subject and i think, subconsciously i assumed that spots were really caused by people not cleaning their face.

I'm not saying i didn't have the odd pimple, of course i did, but never anything noticable. And i just got used to the compliments : "oh you've got great skin" and i went through life believing i was pretty. Because i was told it, i believed it, and i was confident, out-going and popular, and never without a boyfriend throughout my teenage years. Don't stop reading here, thinking that i'm blowing my own trumpet... I have yet to get to the reality.

At the age of 18, i was going to my school formal. My dress was low-cut at the front, and a couple of months before the night i had a bad breakout on my chest. I tried oxytetracyline from the doc. It didn't work. I dreaded the thought of everyone seeing it- such was my vanity, so as i had heard that the contraceptive pill "Dianette" was good for spots, i chanced my arm in seeing a doctor to see if he would put me on it. My luck was in, as we had a student doctor that week, and he gave it to me without much questioning.

I took Dianette for a couple of years, and i must say it was a miracle worker- In those years i never had a single spot. Not even
one. (Anyone who does have acne should try this pill.) But recently my doctor decided that a couple of years was too much for that particular pill, and it has been shown to give a higher risk of thrombosis. I decided to take a break. and during that few months i had a few spots, but that was to be expected from the hormonal withdrawal. And it wasn't anything i couldn't deal with.

At this stage i wasn't sexually active, but about 10 months ago i met my current boyfriend, and i needed to go back on the pill for contraceptive reasons. I saw my doc, and he put me on "Microgynon." He has effectively ruined my complexion. As i had a history of spots, i should never have been given this pill- the progestrogen is much too high for my body to deal with. Within 21 days my skin was a mess. Sore red spots at both sides of my face. After the cycle, i went to see the female doctor in tears, and she looked through my notes, and shook her head. I should never have been given that pill. With women who have skin complaints, a contraceptive pill high in oestrogen is supposed to be prescribed. And most definately NOT Microgynon. She prescribed me "Brevinor" an oestrogen-strong pill.

I'm into the second month of Brevinor now. My skin hasn't really cleared up, but it hasn't got any worse- somedays its almost perfect, but most days its blotchy, but its not getting worse so that's a bonus. But i feel so down now. Some days I look in the mirror and i see a mess. Other days, when there are no new spots i get back to my normal self. I feel as if everyone is looking at me when i'm in public. I notice all the people around me with clear skin, and think that they just don't appreciate it. On a bad day it feels like people are laughing at me. On a bad day i dread my boyfriend seeing me. I get up before him so i can run to the bathroom mirror to make sure it hasn't gotten any worse through the night. Sometimes i feel l
ike i must disgust him. But he's an angel. He tells me i'm beautiful every day, and says that he knew me before my skin was bad, he knew the happy confident me, and he's not going to run off. He also tells me it's in my imagination, which sometimes helps. And above all,he notices if i'm having a good skin day. He's my rock and without him i have a feeling that i would slip lower and lower into depression.

Acne is an awful experience. I urge anyone who knows someone with acne not to stare or try to talk to them about it. It's embarrassing and hurtful. I'm a confident person underneath it all. But on a bad day i can't look people in the face, not even people i know well. I use my hair to cover as much as i can- which probably makes it worse. The psychological problems caused by acne are just too many to mention. Self-esteem is knocked sideways, replaced by self-consiousness. People can become depressed and sad, i fully understand this now, i wish i had when i was younger.

I'm sad, but i know now that my problem is being fixed. And to anyone reading this, acne is no longer something that you just have to suffer- you have many options, see your doctor. Be wary of contraceptive pills: the right one will do wonders. The wrong one will cause months of problems. Above all, keep your head up. You are a worth-while person, and it is what's underneath that counts. I always thought that last line was just a cliche. But having experienced this first hand, i think i'm a better more tolerant person. I've learned a lot about myself through this. And it bloody well hurts.

Good Luck xx
lou.

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