66, 67, 68, 69 ... a good mouthwash! (Other Mouthwash)

Member Name: Sexy Kay

Product:	Other Mouthwash
Date:	09/05/02 (236 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Cheap

Disadvantages: Taste

I don't know if this is true but a friend at work was telling me about how her little daughter was learning to count. She was doing this aloud, "... 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69 ... er, Mummy, what comes after 69?"

"A good mouthwash", shouted out her husband before she had a chance to answer.

So while I was away in Cornwall for a few days, with my BoyFriend, I thought I'd better buy some. No, not for that reason - as if! I had just forgotten to take any with me. As we were in an Asda store, buying a few essentials (wine and beer) for our friends with whom we were staying, I plonked a bottle in my basket. I always use it every night, honest.

I've got this thing, you see, about a nice fresh mouth and clean teeth (along with handsome hands). If I meet someone new, male or female, I always check this out, in a discreet way of course. I don't wrench open their mouth and peer inside, or anything like that. I feel therefore it's only fair that, if I notice this about other people, I should make sure my own teeth look OK and that I keep my breath as pure as my mind.

BF says I'm obsessed and that I'm always making horse like faces, while checking my gnashers in the bathroom mirror. I hate seeing food and other debris lodged in peoples' teeth though, don't you?

Every night I brush my teeth thoroughly, floss them diligently and then use a mouthwash, this is before I place them in the glass - I fibbed about the last bit.

Anyway, the brand I bought in Cornwall was 'Asda Protect Extra Strength Fluoride Mouthwash'. Had never used this before, but it was cheap at £1.10 for a 500ml bottle so I thought it would do for a few days.

That night I used the mouthwash. It looked the colour of weak tea and smelt not unlike very diluted cat's pee - but waste not, want not! I sloshed it round my mouth and squished it through my teeth. It made my tongu
e tip tingle and after spitting it out, in a delicate ladylike manner, it left an unpleasant aftertaste.

I snuck into bed to be met by BF's lips giving me a smacker before I had a chance to get settled. He was 'Mr. I'm On Holiday Man'. Know what I mean? He whispered and told me that, as our friends were in the next room, I had to be quiet and not sound like a cross between some mad banshee woman and a wolf howling at the full moon. Bloody cheek! He also said, "Oh, and by the way you smell and taste like a dentist's surgery". It obviously didn't put him off and, as he had said all of this in a jokey, cuddly way, I didn't take offence and allowed, or maybe even encouraged, proceedings to continue.

Five minutes later, and before I finally tried to sleep, I had a glass of water to try and take away the taste (of the mouthwash). It definitely wasn't very pleasant and seemed to linger despite ... well despite everything that can happen in such a short time - which isn't a lot. Keep quiet? Blimey, there wasn't time to work up a good howl!

The next night I tried the mouthwash again but soon reached the conclusion that it just wasn't compatible with my mouth. I had followed the instructions properly: 'rinse your mouth with half a capful of undiluted mouthwash'. I mean, how difficult is that? Though you have to be careful not to swallow any. Huh! That made me smile. You can put it in your mouth, but mustn't swallow. How safe is the stuff then? I know one swallow doesn't make a relationship but that doesn't sound convincing.

Right, what's in this Extra Strength elixir that, 'has been specially formulated for longer lasting power against bad breath'? Gawd knows. There's water, that's the main ingredient, and Sodium Fluoride but what all the other names and codes are I've no idea. For example, it's got CI 42051 & CI 16035 a
nd Cetylpyridinium amongst other things. For all I know one of those may just happen to be the diluted cat pee smell that my nose seemed to detect.

As you may gather I'm none too impressed by this mouthwash!

It all sounds alright on the bottle. As well as keeping your mouth as fresh as a tiddled on daisy it is also supposed to: protect against cavities, protect against plaque and stengthen tooth enamel. Can't really say fairer than that for just over a pound I suppose. But it's the taste, and the way that this clings to the teeth, and the lingering smell if you were to say a big 'huh' to anyone, that puts me off. It's definitely not built for romance. Unless, that is, your man is reved up for a few minutes with holiday passion, or alcohol, and wouldn't really notice if you had bathed in the stuff.

Oh, and it's not a suitable to be used for bleeding or swollen gums or any other minor mouth problems. It isn't one of those medical or disinfection type products that can help with such things.

I see from the bottle that the mouthwash is, 'specially produced in the EU for Asda Stores Limited'. Strewth, they actually import it! Now let's think, what country doesn't like the UK very much and would enjoy the thought of us swilling our mouths with feline enhanced water? Several probably. At least they do the decent thing by saying that this shouldn't be used by children under 12 years and should be kept out of the reach of kids in general. Very wise. It's also got a safety cap that needs a good squeeze in the right place to open.

To sum up I'd say, "Sorry Asda, but I wouldn't recommend this product to Dooyoo members".

I've still got the bottle in my bathroom cabinet after having used it only the twice. Any offers? No one out there with a cat fluids fetish? Never mind. I know, I'll keep it for when BF's mother n
ext visits.

I love visiting Cornwall but it's good to be back home again and somewhere I can make a bit of noise!

;-> Kay

P.S. And don't forget to look after your teeth: brush, floss, mouthwash and the occassional 'disclosing tablet' to reveal any plaque deposits. I'll be having a peek and checking if I bump into you! And scrub those finger nails ...

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