If your car smells of brie, you need a new tree! (Other Car Accessories)

Member Name: sersha

Product:	Other Car Accessories
Date:	25/07/02 (440 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: nice fir tree shape, cheap, masks unpleasant odours

Disadvantages: distracting where it dangles, can make your fingers smell if you accidentally touch it, masks unpleasant odours

Right, come on, own up. Are you one of the car drivers with a dead magic tree hanging from your car mirror that hasn't smelled of anything since 1989? I knew it. No, it doesn't last forever, you do have to throw it away and buy a new one. Come on now, they're only a couple of quid!

I have been so bored by my morning commute (I don't do the driving, he does, as I am half dead until we nearly get there) that I have had to try and find new and interesting ways to spice up the morning journey.

We tried I-spy first:
Him: "I spy with my little eye something beginning with S."
Me: "sheep."
Him: Yes. You.
Me: "I spy with my little eye something with C."
Him: Cow.
Me: Yes.
Him "I spy with my little eye something with S".
Me: Sheep again?

You get the picture. Anyhow, the other day I decided to count magic trees in other cars. (Probably best not to ask, to be honest.)

And on average, given a population of commuters to Edinburgh, I'd have to say there's about a four percent dead-tree ratio. Honest, about one in 20 cars has a dead tree. Ok, so it may not be dead, it may be in its seventh week. What, all of them? I don't think so. You see, the magic tree has a lifespan of seven whole weeks. I know this as I read the back of the packet. (Sad Ciao/(and Dooyoo!) Person Fact. Hubby has now started referring to my SCMs - Sad Ciao Moments, when I begin to read ingredients on things and make conversation about it. Not entirely complimentary about my favourite website, but this is coming from a man who likes WWF wrestling, What can I say??!)

Seven weeks. It comes in a plastic wrapper, and the idea is that you gradually peel off a bit at a time to release the pungence. (I was going to say fragrance but that doesn't quite cut it.)
Just by snipping the tiniest bit of the top you get this whooshing aroma of polo mints (green on
e) Old Man Aftershave (red one) or Jif Wipes (yellow one.) There are other colours, but I haven't tried them yet. In fact I read somewhere that there are loads of different kinds - over 30 in fact, now theres a challenge for someone... (let me know if you have seen any others, or if you know what the blue one is!)

If I am right, no one in the world actually uses the magic tree the way it is meant to be used. They just whip off the wrapper, and enjoy seven days of their car absolutely honking (but at least it blocks out the brie... actually it was stilton but try rhyming that with tree...)

And then after three days, dead, kaput, finito. Tree dead. What a waste. What I can't understand is how they put up with the pong.

Serious Consumer Moment:

The magic tree is very whiffy indeed, and will mask 4 week old Mcdonald's cartons amongst other things. If you follow the instructions properly, your car will actually smell quite nice for seven weeks. If you just rip off the wrapper, you deserve all you get. That's all I'm saying. I would recommend it, I think £2 for seven weeks of peppermint (the best one IMHO) is worthwhile. It's just a bit annoying that the only good place for it is dangling in front of the mirror where it is quite distracting.

I can't tell you how it works or even whats in it, as www.saxonind.co.uk (Saxon industries invented the magic tree) doesn't actually say very much about the tree at all.

Obligatory Sexual Reference:

Its actually a very sexy process, undressing the tree week by week, revealing a branch on a Monday morning and finding your fingers whiff of aftershave for the rest of the day. In the car accessory world, these are the lapdancers. I was going to continue the stripping metaphor but I think I'll quit while I'm behind.


TREE FAQ

1 Q How much is a tree?
A It cost £1.75 which I think is about average.


2 Q Where can I buy a magic tree?
A In any good petrol station. (Actually in almost any petrol station.)

3 Q Am I just too lazy to clean my car?
A Yes, and its not my car, its his, so why should I clean it?

4 Q How did my car end up smelling of Stilton?
A It fell out the shopping bag and was under the seat for two weeks. Refer to Q3.

5 Q What is wrong with WWF?
A Nothing, what is wrong with reading the ingredients on things?

Summary: