Sloane Ciccone *UPDATED* (Madonna in general)

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Product:	Madonna in general
Date:	30/08/01 (24 review reads)
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Advantages: She's only up the frog and toad, She drinks at the Queen Vic, She's 'appy!

Disadvantages: The mystery has gone, She hangs about with Vinnie! , She charges more than a 'monkey' for a concert ticket!

Hi- I originally rushed this op and hence did not get many reads. I have since updated it. So I apologise if you have already read it. But here is the new and hopefully 'improved' version.

IN THE BEGINNING......

Madonna was a fresh young artist; a street artist. Before the hype she was a shy, mousy haired street artist who could dance and wanted to be a singer badly. After featuring in the group, The Breakfast Club, Madonna wanted a slice of solo fame. After begging DJ's and music execs to listen to her music, all the hard efforts paid off. Her anthem Holiday was one of the most played songs on the radio. She became famous for her fashion statements too. No "Posh" pierced lip for Madge. Belly button out for all to see accompanied by a crucifix. Bubblegum pop music of the best kind filled the airwaves, and a star was born. The crucifix, the home made jewelery, the lips, the puppy fat, the mesh tops, the moves, the bubbly lyrics, the fresh sound- all of these components let the world know that Madonna was here!

TRUE BLUE..............

Later on in her career came the album True Blue and the hits followed. Papa Don't Preach, True Blue, Open Your Heart, and many more followed. Ground breaking videos meant that Madonna could really reach out and grab the new MTV generation. She tipified the 1980's. She came, she saw and sang like crazy. Madonna was global. She peformed at Live Aid and her plan was clear- global domination and a career in movies. Desperately Seeking Susan showed us all that she could be packing cinemas for years to come. Until we (well, I think it was just me - actually!) saw Shanghai Surprise! She married actor, Sean Penn. And the press were almost married the the couple too! Followed everywhere, the realtionship began to get volitile towards each other and the world could sense that things were not right.

LIKE A PRAYER...............

Controversy and and a major deal
with Pepsi did the material girl no harm. She was reinvented again as brown haired siren with a personal album which showed the world there was more to her than pure pop. She could also write about pain too! The divorce from Sean, the press intrusion, the pain of losing her mother- all of these personal stories were told through the power of music. Like A Prayer told all of Madonna's detractors that she was here to stay. The deal with Pepsi may have been off, but the music certainly was not. Madonna had learned also how to keep the press guessing. Hanging around with Sandra Bernhard gave her the lesbian chic role and also meant that she got more headlines and more record sales.

In between more movies- Who's That Girl and many others which went straight to video. Madonna has worked with Woody Allen and Alan Parker but has struggled to be taken seriously as an actress.

THE TOURS..................

Blond Ambition - pointy cone bras, swear-words and dancers galore filled the stage in the tour to end all tours. In Bed With Madonna promised loads and delivered Madonna in bed, going all oral on a bottle, and scratching an itch in her cozzy in front of thousands! The jogging in Hyde Park with hundreds of journalists in tow is all that we seem to remember from 1990's Blond Ambition Tour but the stage show itself was pure dynamite. Sure, it was controversial but the megastar filled the stage with a sense of wonder and you just did not know what was coming next. Also the barrage of hits was unbeliveable. Madonna was huge!

THE SEX.................. Well, there was a

bit earlier but there's loads more..

Sex has always been a major selling point. But with the release of Erotica and the Sex book- the public started to look a bit Barbara Windsor-ed out! We saw Madonna nude in Playboy, Body Of Evidence, and The Sex book. Oh and she sung about it loads on the Erotica album. What hadn't Madonna shown us? Her
kidneys? Her intestines? The public at large, even fans began to think- "Get on with the music!" Deeper And Deeper, songs about 'eating out'- the double entendres were all there to be laughed at. But even the British "Carry On" style humour failed to work it's magic on the record buying public. Madonna was faced with her first flop album. could this be the end? Madonna's last track from Erotica was called Bad Girl. The public had voted without their cash this time and seemed to be fed up with the bad girl image.

BEDTIME.................

Bedtime Stories came out and many critics did just that- they put Madonna to bed. The album was a weird and wonderful mix in which Madge collaborated with Bjork, Babyface and the writers behind Mariah Carey's biggest hits. But the results seemed to eclectic for most Madonna fans. Take A Bow did not even enter the Top Ten. Apart from Secret, no-one really bothered buying the rest of the singles in great numbers. Madonna was not as popular with fans or critics and with young pretenders queueing up to steal her crown, was it time for Madonna to hang up her cone bra and corset and literally go to bed? She decied that it was time to go home and have a re-think. Madonna took a sabatical from pop and carried on with movies. The film, Blue In The Face followed. Not heard of it? Hardly surprising, it did not receive a wide cinema release.

DON'T CRY FOR HER

Evita was the film to prove all the critics wrong. Madonna could sing! But we kind of knew that anyway. But Madge was happy. The film was failry well received. It made more money than any of her other films. The cinematography was stunning. She got to star alongside Antonio Banderas and um... Jimmy Nail. She was nominated for a Golden Globe and then subsequently snubbed at The Oscars. But the film made money and the hits from the film followed. My nan and countless OAPs were very happy! They loved Evita! The nu
dity, swearing and in yer face attitude of old was almost forgotten about. Madge was at ease with the blue rinse brigade at last. They loved her! "GRANDMA DON'T PREACH!"


RAYS OF LIGHT.........

Ray Of Light appeared like a ...well, ray of light actually! And suddenly Madonna, the earth mother was born. Chanting and yoga replaced the gym and nudity. SHE WAS BACK. She bought out a stonking single Frozen which was not about Iceland's special offers and the public were happy that the material girl was back in the charts. The hits and the good crits followed. The Album was a huge best seller and proof that Madonna was not down or out. She knocked all of other the young pretenders clean out of the charts. Kylie Minogue had a new album and a new image out in the same year but Madonna overshadowed the pint sized sex kitten and became the public's main talking point in music yet again. Oh and Madge had a little baby- Lourdes or Lola as Barry Manilow likes to call her! Her very own little star!

MUSIC AND GUY

Music saw Madge go all Dolly Parton on us. She tapped into the British sense of humour with ease this time. Teaming up with Ali G in the Music video meant that a completely new audience fell in love with Madonna as if she was here for the very first time. She felt like a muscial virgin all over again! She sold loads more records- and met a Guy. She even wrote a song for Guy! How sweet!!!! Another baby arrived. Madonna also started drinking bitter and upped sticks to London.
Friend of Sting, Trudie Styler, Kelly Brook, Jason Statham, and anyone who had anything to do with the awful film, Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (The Italian Jobs without the laughs!).

CHERISH HER? BLESS HER!

Now, with Music selling squillions, a huge tour and Guy Ritchie in tow- the world is Madonna's oyster again. She has re-created the cheap T Shirt and turned it into a fashion statement, thus getting
Kylie and Britney into the newspapers at the same time.

SO WHAT POINT AM I TRYING TO MAKE?

I have loved Madonna since I was twelve years old but I am starting to become really jaded.

WHY- I KNOW WHO THAT GIRL IS NOW!

Well, that's why really! The Guy Ritchie romance doesn't seem right to me. Madonna has turned from LA girl into a sloane! Don't believe me? Listen to the accent in The Next Best Thing!

A HOME GIRL BUT CHARGES FOR IT!

She charges the earth for her gigs, moans about British house prices, likes hunting, beer, sitting in a pub with Vinnie Jones and Kelly Brook! Ok, so I have been reading too many copies of Heat! But what I'm trying to say is:

I WANT MEGA STAR MADONNA BACK!

You know the huge million record selling diva who would encourage mobs of people to camp out. The woman who was in total control of her life, her destiny and who was influenced by no-one. Not this new age folk singer. I saw the recent gig on Channel 4 and the dancing and singing has been replaced by bigger and better is best. The guitar playing looked frankly, embarrassing to me. As she strummed away waiting for mass applause, I began to feel my stomach churning It was cringeworthy.

CARRY ON GANGSTER!

Not the woman who appears in What It Feels Like To A Girl directed by her public school-boy/turned Cockney husband- Guy Ritchie. Not the woman who goes hunting and has turned into Sarah Ferguson. What next, hunting with The Queen?

NO LONGER LIKE A VIRGIN

A life long fan all this time. Am I jaded? Have I just grown up? Am I jealous of the Lock Stocker now that he has the Material Girl to himself? Or do I prefer the 1980's Icon to the McDONNA (Boy George's words!) of 2001? I don't know but whatever I'm not as mad on her as I used to be. I know that much.

Am I the only one who feels a bit 'Frozen' towards the poshest queen of pop? W
hat do other people think? Do you prefer the guitar playing folk singer of 2001, or are you longing to hear Madonna play the tracks that made her famous rather than a whole new album and some mediocre surprise tracks? Does the new London thing grate on you? I just feel that Madonna used to be my playground and my pride and joy but in 2001 she just seems plastic.

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