Newest Review: ... and mumbling is endearing in its own way. The concept of the show is pretty good, in that the Ground Force team moves in to sort out the... more
Swing baby swing.
Date: 31/12/01, updated on 22/05/02 (15 review reads)
Advantages: 30 minutes of useless telly filled
Disadvantages: See above
One question on my mind whilst watching unemployment TV is how many Quincys did they make. Everytime i have switched on there he is, I wonder if Jack Klugman is still living off the royalties of just that run.
Another tired flogged product is the make over show where a gang of soon to be celebrities pile into some suburban home and transform it into the insides of a Athena shop.
I had a great new approach for Groundforce when they finally stray a way from the Middle Class homes they always do up and pitch up in an inner city housing estate.A couple of security guards could keep an eye on the cement mixer and the four wheel drives and way we go.
The police would have no problem spotting a Range Rover with Groundforce logos all over it doing 90mph full of joy riders!.
Charlie could flirt with the boys and girls as usual as the guys begin flexing the muscle. First they can through a few mattresses in the corner then crane in a rusty Hillman Imp with three wheels. A nice 1983 washing machine to power the water feature and super grow grass so it’s four feet high by the end of the program. Finally a fine liberal sprinkling of totally unsafe plastic toys.
Charlie could wear a Kappa shell suit and baseball cap to blend in with the locals.
Alan Titchmarsh could nip over the fence when it gets dark and nick a few bits and bobs for the new look and perhaps empty the odd firdge freezer for a slap up meal.
So why don’t these make over lifestyle shows ever venture out to properties that really could do with it. Is there and elaborate scam where presenters do up their mates and relatives houses. I know one of the girls was arrested this year for running a fake consultancy company.
They apparently did one garden quite near a dodgy area, which was raided after the job was done at night leaving only a plastic flower display. Even the turf and the pebbles were half inched!.
With one hundred and twelve channels now ava
ilable ion Britain’s TV it means that there could be over 3000 shows out there, every single house could have the complete freebee by the end of next year on these tedious shows.
It would sort out all the ghettos and give tons of work to new deal claimants.Theres a massive work creating industry out there waiting to be switched on.
When we were kids we would take great joy in digging up the garden to bury toys or make bases for Airfix soldiers. We had rabbits to that loved digging caverns. We lost over 34 bunnies in the traumatic period between 1970-75 through dexterous tunnels under Mr Harris heavily dug in fence.
Posy gardens are yet another expression of how important and Englishman’s/woman’s castle is. Having some TV people surprise you and then f**k off isn’t exactly an achievement of self worth is it.
I have a secret for you,I snogged Charlie Dimmock at college.Her chest was very pert in those days from the sad sagging pair of two litre coke bottles we are treated with now.I never did get to let those particular puppies out of the bag.Great kisser though.I bet she didn’t know how famous and significant i wouldn’t turn out!
Now she’s taking her fame way too seriously and planning a trapeze artist career for yet another banal daytime TV excursion. Well she was a bit of a swinger at that college you know, these rustic chicks always are.
They do a good job though and im serious about the team heading out to poorer areas. We need a bit more conflict and substance here to make them more interesting don’t you think. Did you know that last year Charlie was the Eighty sixth most paid celebrity in Britain.And she is a Capricorn who make up %20 off the top ten female earners.
But now cooking and the sexy chefs like Nigella and co are the trend as we snug up in the kitchen away from the scurrying woodlice,,,,like Titchmrash.Maybe we could have a complete house and garden make
over at once which includes the meal as well.
Nigelle bouncing around as she bumps into Charlie.The other pair of Tits in Alan and handy Andy flogging books and gimmick records!.
It time to kill of realityTV where we the tedious public are the stars and get back to quality and not quantity TV.