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I Did Tell, I Did - Cassie Harte
by Sue Woolston
I have read many books on this awful subject and it amazes me how people cope and get on with life and ultimately end up with a better, sometimes professional life helping other victims of abuse. I still to this day do not understand what men (and women sadly) get out of raping and abusing such tiny vulnerable children. and with an 8 ... year old grand daughter, want nothing more than to love and protect her.
With Cassie's story though, I do honestly fail to understand why she continued to let this vile man rape her when she had broken away at 18 years of age? Why and how could she not tell, I know that he terrified her and threatened her and said no one would believe her after years of abuse, but still find it hard that she could not stick up for herself and go to the authorities or police when the abuse continued at such a late age, (and knowing he was her father). I must say that I got very angry and confused by this.
To this end though, I send Cassie all my very best wishes, and as I am only a few years younger than her, do know some of the hardships of the 50's, though not the abuse as I was thankfully brought up in a loving caring environment, and although not well off, we always food on the table and kind loving parents.
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I Did Tell, I Did - Cassie Harte
by MelissaRuth
This is not the sort of book I'd normally choose to read, but I was loaned it and strongly recommended to read it, so I did as I was told and gave it a go. The foreword told me that the author had had an extremely hard life and that she was always lonely and afraid and that an evil person had existed in her life, so I was forewarned ... that this was not going to be the relaxing easy read, as I would generally choose.
The cover also portrays immense sadness. The photo of a young girl resting her chin on bed covers with striking sad blue eyes is displayed in a soft focus against a white background. The title is written in pink reflective hand written childlike script and the caption below reads 'The True Story of a Little Girl Betrayed By Those Who Should Have Loved Her'.
In the first couple of chapters Cassie introduces us to the harsh life she experienced as a very small child feeling unwanted and different from her brother and sisters, but then issues of child abuse arise and I found it extremely upsetting and thought that I would not be able to continue. However I did persevere and soon became immersed in her account of the abuse that she experienced and 'the in-between bits' of her life - the positive things such as school and friends that gave some respite for her.
Cassie was born in 1945 and is the same age as my parents and one of her children was born in the same year as me. This helped to ground the story for me as I felt that although there was no comparison in our lives I could relate to what else was going on in society at this time and to the kind of childhood that both my parents and I had.
Half of the book relates her childhood and the second half moves through her relationships and parenting experiences, bringing the reader right up to date to 2009 when the book was published, and when she had reached a point in her life when she could talk about the incredibly awful experiences she had endured. She reached this point through coming to an understanding of what love really is, and the support of the family that she had created. So many issues are raised from her own personal viewpoint, child abuse, adoption, dependency on GP prescribed drugs and withdrawel from these, single parenting and the stigma associated with this, relationship difficulties and the list goes on.
It was harrowing to read, but she is a skilled and truthful writer (she would have been a journalist if only she'd been allowed) and somehow she compelled me to stay with her and hope for some form of happiness to show itself in her life. I really didn't want to stop reading and finished the book in 6 days which for me is as quick as it ever usually gets. The 292 pages just flew by.
I know that there are many of these genre of book on the market currently - they seem to be the in thing, and I'm not sure how many I would read. However I would recommend this one due to the quality of the writing. Occasionally I think that it does me good to be challenged and consider some of the issues that are going on out there in the real world, horrifying as it is, and to remember that not everyone is as lucky as me. Who knows what secrets people I meet may be trying to deal with and what impact past and currents events may be having on how their lives have turned out and effecting how they deal with the here and now. It's humbling really, to see what Cassie has achieved and by sharing her story maybe she is helping others - especially the knowledge that keeping quiet is not good.
I feel that to cope with reading this book you probably need to be at a relatively emotionally strong point in life, but also that it could be really helpful to anyone who has experienced these kind of issues especially physical or mental abuse in their own lives, and particularly if they have not yet realised that they will be believed if they talk to someone, despite any threats that may have been made.
This book is excellent, but due to its harrowing nature I am rating it as a 4. It is certainly not a book to take on your holidays.
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