Product Type: Lush body care
Newest Review: ... is also good for repairing skin. It is gentle, easy to apply leaving skin soft and silky. Taken from Lush's website " The oil's a... more
I'M HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH...........
Lush Dream Cream
Lush Dream Cream
Date: 13/09/01, updated on 26/09/02 (305 review reads)
Advantages: good on dry, sore, skin
Disadvantages: not exactly cheap, but it is good value
Alan has a girlfriend.
Does she know I’m his other woman?
Does she know he does other women favours?
Does she care?
Err, I doubt it. I think she’s quite proud of what he does though. The lucky sod probably gets lots of freebies.
OK I’ll come clean here. Alan works for Lush. At Lush they mould soaps, shampoos and mix aromatic concoctions by hand. They then leave a loving message on each product, tenderly wrapped by their own bare hands. These messages consist of a sticker telling who made the product, when it was made and when it should be used by. He even tests the product on other humans, not animals, before he sends it to the shops so it will be safe for my consumption.
Alan made my Dream Cream. He lovingly mixed the secret recipe blend of oils and creams. He mixes up oat milk, rose water, olive oil, cocoa butter, glycerine, stearic acid, chamomile oil, tea tree oil, lavender oil, perfume and wax. I say secret recipe, as though they state what they put in their products, they don’t exactly state how much. Believe me, I have tried to reproduce my own versions of some of these products, many have, but nothing is like the original.
I like to sugar my legs to get rid of the unwanted hairs. This is supposed to be a tamer version of waxing. Recently my cat jumped up on the bed and, instead of sitting on the vacant area of the bed; she chose to jump next to me and landed on a used piece of cloth. She flew across the room causi
ng much amusement trying to get it off. Luckily she got it off and wasn’t hurt or furless.
The problem with sugaring my legs is when the hairs grow back. My legs are like a volcano. The hairs bubble under Mount slsmolblu1977 and when they begin to erupt they go into shock, goose bumps ripple on the surface and my legs get very, very itchy. The problem with an itch is you’ve got to scratch. You can’t resist, you itch and the volcano erupts, blood trickles down your legs and you’re left with unsightly scabs and blisters.
My legs aren’t for consumption before dinner, as the poor postman will testify. I greeted him in my pyjamas the other morning. He must have though his luck was in, but I think he soon changed his mind after looking at my knobbly legs.
To make matters worse, on Monday, I decided to go for a trip. It wasn’t planned, well the trip to the railway station was, but not in the way I did it. I’m 5 foot 8 and I’m an absent minded Doris who can’t tie her shoelaces properly. The laces weren’t to blame. My attention was distracted on the bridge and before you could say ‘layout double back somersault’ I was in the laid-out reverse position on the floor. I stared at my trousers where a frayed hole was glaring at me. My only pair of pants without a hole or paint (artistic people will know what I mean), had succumbed to the fate of the rest of my clothes.
My skin began to turn a kind of grey-blue. The skin Billy Connolly says Scotsmen have. The kind that takes a day in the hot sun just to turn white.
So plucked and injured I turned to my trusty pot of Dream Cream. It is a bland but fresh smelling cream designed to soothe sore skin and calm it’s angry face, stopping bloody lava spewing forth. It is not highly perfumed and is made with the essential oils such as lavender; tea tree and chamomile that heal skin irritations .I have had stress related
blister-like eczema on my legs and it worked wonders on that too. The skin licks it up with its big bristly, (slightly hairy) tongue like the cat does with the cream. When I had this eczema I also used to take Vitamin B supplements so I can’t give this cream all the credit for clearing it up
Alan and I should have really finished our affair by now. The products aren’t made with any preservatives and artificial colourings and they are supposed to be used up within a year. However, I still have some left and it is a few months past that date. I’ll probably continue to use it till it goes off. It hasn’t yet.
For now my accident prone self will rely on Alan. Then we will have to say are farewells. I will then turn my attentions to the handiwork of perhaps another lovely bloke when I purchase a new pot.
Alan will then become a distant memory.
If you want to purchase some of Alan’s handiwork or that of any of the other lovely men or women at Lush visit the website at: -
http://www.lush.co.uk and you can order online by credit/debit card Orders carry an extra charge of £2.95 for postage and packing if the orders are less than £25.00.
Mail order department is open from 9am till 7pm Monday to Friday and 10am to 2pm on Saturdays.
You have to wait 10 working days before your delivery.
The number is 01202 668545
Fax number 01202 661 832
You can also but from one of their many shops in the UK and around the world. To find out where you have to visit the website. Every so often, Lush produces the Lush Times which is a fanzine-style catalogue with all of the products, plus pictures and comments from customers. It is 40p but it is given out free with any purchase.
Dream Cream is £6.45 for a 250-g tub. It is one of three hand and body moisturisers produced by Lush. The others are Sympathy for the Skin and Helping Hands.
- Elizabeth Arden Visible Difference Skin Balancing Exfoliating Cleanser
- Elizabeth Arden Visible Difference Peel & Reveal Revitalizing Mask
- Elizabeth Arden Visible Difference Skin Balancing Exfoliating Toner
- Lancaster Suractif Non Stop Lifting Advanced Mask
- Lancaster Suractif Non Stop Lifting Advanced Night Cream
- Lancaster Suractif Non Stop Lifting Advanced Rich Day Cream SPF 15