Slapping Off in Danmark (Short Breaks in Denmark)

Member Name: "420565

Product:	Short Breaks in Denmark
Date:	31/03/03 (163 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: -

Disadvantages: -

As there is no category entitled So Spontaneous They Almost Aren't Enjoyable Breaks in Denmark, it's probably logical that I suffice with the next best thing, which would be a Short Break in Denmark. But this wasn't necessarily that. It was short, indeed it was. But it was so sudden I hardly had time to realise I had even left the country before I was walking around Copenhagen like a lost little mermaid, or an ugly duckling. Matti Hakkarainen, my rapping roommate whom I may have mentioned on some occasion or another, came home Friday evening with five mysteriously procured tickets for a flight to Copenhagen. He offered my friends and me the chance to go with him if we wanted. Though I didn't exactly have ample time to consider whether or not I really wanted to drop what I was doing to fly to the Melancholy Kingdom of the Danes for a day and a half, I spent a relatively long while giving it consideration. Last minute excursions with Matti, as I've established from past experience, aren't so much excursions as they are nerve-wracking trials of psychological fortitude. Par example, the last time I fell for his little "I've got a few tickets for a random flight that leaves in two hours, you want to come?" trick, I spent the entire weekend sitting in an emergency room in Tallinn, Estonia, watching Miss Congeniality (that Sandra Bullock movie, sort of funny) while I waited for his girlfriend, who somehow contracted a beasty urinary tract infection. Not my idea of tourism.

But anyway, those sort of escapades aside, I accepted the invitation and flew to Copenhagen against my screaming inhibitions. It was surprising, actually, that despite being in the company of my less than mature friends, whom I've designated for purposes apparent Fric, Frac, Paco, and Chuckles, I actually got to do things at a normal pace, given our time constraints and unpreparedness. Let me go on...

First of all, have you been to
Copenhagen? I don't know if you have or not, but it wouldn't be all too fair to assume you have. So I'll go on the assumption that you haven't, and offer some basic stuff about the city that may prove itself useful to someone who hasn't been there enough to make friendly acquaintence with Karen Blixen's ectoplasm (is she dead?) or Queen Margarethe's silly underground system.

Copenhagen, in case you don't know, is the Danish capital of the world. More Danish people are found in Copenhagen than anywhere else in the world, except for maybe Marbella in August. Because it's the capital city of Denmark. Makes sense, doesn't it? It's located on a peninsula away from the mainland. In English I think it's called Zealand, where Copenhagen is. Or maybe Sealand. In anycase, it's one of the two. Historically speaking, it is one of Scandinavia's and actually all of Europe's most relevant cities, dating back to the good old Viking days as a trade port (hence the name, a bastardisation of the Danish "merchant's port") to today, where it still serves as a hub of transportation between the more remote northlands and mainland Europe. Like the rest of Scandinavia, it's really quite expensive, and the standard of living is very high. Clean, fancy roads and plenty of efficiently run hospitals, should some strain of crap befall you during your stay.

But because this is a category specified for very short breaks, I can suggest only one thing-- Christiania. Short breaks are supposed to be relaxing, and there's no better place to relax than Christiania. In fact, you really don't have any option but to relax, even if you are strongly opposed to such an idea. You probably are now, given that the Danish verb "to relax" is "slappe af", which actually isn't pronounced as you'd assume, but still. It looks kind of goofy if you're reading with En
glish eyes. Anyway, Christiania's claim to fame is its bounty of inhalants, which tend to "slap off" the weary travel like no sleeping pill has ever been known to.

Though it's technically part of Copenhagen, Christiania is as much Copenhagen as it is Phuket, Thailand. It's full of all manner of weird crap, and is divided into districts which boast such daft names as Cow Parsnip, The Prairie, and Cairn. I'm serious. It's sparsely populated and refreshingly devoid of streetlights. Whether due to financial shortcomings or the locals' passion for gazing vapidly into the twilight sky, I don't know. But either way, Christiania is awfully dark at night. Most travel guides are full of nonesense when they tell you that to stroll about Christiania is to take your life or at least your wallet precariously in your hands. There's no truth in that. Maybe I'm not a reliable source, as my friends and I didn't quite stand out with our old military surplus rucksacks and artfully forged bottles of absinth, but there doesn't seem to be much danger. The residents and their pets are extremely laid back, even by Copenhagen standards, and are likely even to light up your joint if you lack the means and can muster up the courage to ask.

But if you don't really like that scene, there's still more to do in Christiania than toke up on the Dutch stuff. Not that you'd even waste your time in going there if you don't have such activities in mind, but who knows what some do? There are all kinds of themed buildings suited to a scary fairy land, including the Banana House and a Buddhist pagoda. Sure, they're more fun when you're wasted, but all you need is a little imagination and you're on your way to a lovely time.

But crap, I've got to go. Go to Christiania, but don't try speaking Danish unless you already know Norwegian and you have a plentiful supply of potatoes
to shove into your mouth as you try to articulate. Ciao!!

Remind me to update this later...

Summary: