The right to choose – my story (Abortion)

Member Name: libertybell

Product:	Abortion
Date:	24/12/00 (115 review reads)
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Advantages: Not sure if want to mention anything here

Disadvantages: As above

I want to recall an experience I had which has shaped my views on this subject.

Back in 1978, I was 16 and in love with a tall redhead I had been seeing since the summer. On Christmas Eve it was customary for my family to attend the torchlight procession in the village I lived in and the church service afterwards.

That Christmas Eve was a particularly fraught one for both of us. My girlfriend’s period was late by a number of days and was getting very anxious that she might have been pregnant. In those days, we were young and foolish in that we didn’t use any contraception. We were both shy and the idea of buying a packet of ‘rubbers’ carried a lot more stigma than it does today. There was no such thing as the ‘morning after pill’. After doing some praying, we were overjoyed when in the middle of the service – she started her period. My girlfriend’s mother later intervened and put her on the pill.

All sorts of implications go racing through your mind at this time and I wanted to share these with you.

Had my girlfriend become pregnant, we would have had 2 options – have the baby or terminate the pregnancy.

Having the baby would have caused much upset to my father who was very Victorian in these matters. Not to mention my girlfriends family. I had just started my A levels and my girlfriend was still at college. We could have got married to ‘legitimise’ it but at 16, we were both very young and unready for bringing up a family. Being totally selfish about it, a baby would have caused major disruptions to any plans for going onto University.

Additionally, we might found that our marriage failed due in part to our new commitments.

We split up about 18 years ago and we last spoke about 6 years ago.

Please don’t get me wrong. I love children and have one of my own. But having one at 16 is a totally different ball game to having a pl
anned one in your mid thirties when you have your own home and can afford it. Call me boring – but that’s the way I am.

We could have had the child adopted – but that would have been very difficult for us. Giving away your own flesh and blood is not something I could stomach.

The other option would have been a termination. This might have caused some moral problems with our families especially as my Mother is quite a devout Christian. There is also the impact on my girlfriend and me. Were we killing an unborn child? Would it be a difficult decision? I cannot answer this, as I have never been in this position. But believe I don’t take it likely.

This part of the opinion is hypothetical – as it never happened. But we would have had a choice although it would have been a difficult one. This is why I am pro-choice. If there are unwanted pregnancies is it a reason to bring children into the world that may be unwanted and unloved. Or who may be adopted or put in homes. Life is precious but as a parent/guardian – you have a legal responsibility to bring up a child until they themselves are legally responsible individuals.

I’m not promoting abortion for the sake of it. On the contrary, I am concerned about the ethical implications of keeping unborn children alive earlier and earlier. I am also concerned about the debates about genetic engineering and the potential ability to ‘pick and mix’ your child’s intelligence, sex etc. I also have some doubts about frozen embryos. All these issues have to be looked at and laws brought in or changed to keep in line with technological developments and public opinion.

Ultimately the choice has to be down to the woman. She will carry the child; she will become emotionally attached to it and will take on the lion’s share of childcare. The current options allow a woman to make the very difficult choice.

In the ideal world,
women wouldn’t have unwanted pregnancies. The many different types of contraception available are there to prevent this. But as I did 22 years ago – many people still don’t use any or have accidents.

And for these reasons – I support the right to choose.

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