Out and Proud (urgh I promise I am not at the front of every pride parade in the county hehe) (Coming Out Stories)

Member Name: katyboo123

Product:	Coming Out Stories
Date:	03/11/09 (44 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: You get to be yourself

Disadvantages: You might hurt people, but only if they are too ignorant to see your happy

So I guess I made this product suggestion because I don't think there's much by the way of an LGBT community section on dooyoo. I suppose I like to hear other people's personal experiences of 'Coming Out' and I even picked a little camp rainbow for the logo!

Although perhaps my own story is pretty uneventful I have heard and experienced with partners some absolute crackers! Emotionally damaging, funny, heart warming - even stories of people's parents coming out to them in return! Now that would be something to write about.

I just thought it would be nice for people to share their stories, as sometimes people are scared of telling their friends and family about their sexuality, this way, readers can take comfort in other peoples stories - particularly if they have a happy or even positive ending. Tell everyone how it happened, how you felt, how it is now you are at the other side of the story, may be in the middle or end chapters of your tale.

For me it all began when I was 18. I worked in a sports shop selling trainers, my boss was great, I had been working there for her for 2 years and during that time we had become really good mates. I really looked up to her and from day 1, I had desperately wanted to be her friend, which I found a little weird and desperate, but I cant really explain it, I just knew I needed to be around her. When I turned 18 and passed my A Levels, it was off to Uni for me. All the staff at work bought me a card and they all used to tease me, saying that all students dabble in relationships with the same sex. In my card almost every message said 'enjoy uni with all the girls' or 'we will always miss you whether you turn gay or not!' etc. My boss, well she wrote something similar. I laughed about it, as we all had - we were all really close at work.

Off I went to Uni, me and my boss who's name I shall change for privacy; I'll call her Miss X, stayed in touch. She came down to my house warming party; it was a disaster, she went out with some of my friends in to the city centre, without telling me, but then came back to stay at my house. I couldn't understand the feelings I had, but I expressed them by saying to her she had hurt me, by using my place as somewhere to crash, and my party as an excuse for a night out. We fell out, but then a few weeks later we made up and went on a night out. We slept in the same bed as we usually did, and we ended up kissing. The next morning she put it down to another drunk encounter with someone she would never see again (I know that because she has since told me), but there was no way I was going to leave it. I wanted to explore the feelings more and I think deep down I knew I was more than just curious) so I text her and we started meeting up with each other and I suppose you could say we were seeing one another.

Miss X then dropped a bombshell. She was leaving her Managerial career to join the Army. It was clear she was running away from who she was because her parents ultimately turned out to be very homophobic. I was absolutely gutted. I wrote to her every week while she did her basic training and we met up with each other when she came home for her long weekend. I told her I wanted to have a relationship with her, it was either all or nothing for me and her Mum was missing her so much that it was making her ill. In the end Miss X left the Army, a week before she completed her basic training.

In the meantime, my parents had gone through a messy divorce and I had dropped out of Uni. I had come back to live with my newly single Mam, so Miss X came to live with me. We got a little flat together, basically because neither of our parents knew about us or about our orientation. I then decided I couldn't lie to my parents any longer, I had never felt so safe and secure with someone, so happy and content. So in Love. I felt like I had wasted date after date with Men who had no idea what it felt like to be me, it was amazing to be with someone who didn't put every strop down to PMT!

I sat looking at the phone, weighing up who I should call first. Damn divorced parents! I called my Mam. I knew my Dad would expect that and he wouldn't be too hurt. Plus I was dreading telling him the most. I can remember the exact conversations:

Me: Mam, I have something to tell you, me and Miss X are more than just friends. We are going out with each other
Mam: I know pet, I've known for a while, I'm your Mam, it's my job to know everything about you.
Me: Um, ok, so what do you think?
Mam: As if you need to ask, as long as you're happy, I couldn't care less. And I love Miss X she looks after you and gets on great with all of us, so I am happy for you both.
Me: Phew. Im going to ring Dad.

Me: Dad, I have something to tell you, me and Miss X are more than just friends. We are going out with each other
Dad: I know, me and your Mam have talked about it in the past.
Me: Yeah, she said she already knew. So...?
Dad: Well, I cant say I'm not disappointed, I want to be a Granddad. But as long as you're happy that's all me and your Mam have ever wanted for you.
Me: Thanks Dad, you might still be a Granddad one day.

So that was that - my grand coming out story! My parents never had a problem with it, and they were both very supportive with Miss X when her parents practically disowned her for about a year when they found out. 7 years on and they are still unsupportive for the most part.

Miss X and I split up at the end of last year we remain great friends. We had a brilliant relationship and I could never be ashamed of who I was. I don't think anyone else should be either. A parent's love for their child should be unconditional, and in my opinion even if you havent got parents like I am lucky enough to have, then its their loss. You can surround yourself with friends, a partner, and other family, like siblings or cousins. I know if I ever do have children I could never be ashamed of them for being happy.

Summary: Do IT!