Auntie Brian!!! (Gender Dysphoria)

Member Name: weeonelass

Product:	Gender Dysphoria
Date:	13/10/01 (73 review reads)
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My dad's uncle has always been a real family man. He had a lovely wife, two children and three grandchildren. He owned his own business as a landscape gardener and was a very masculine man.

He has always been a bit sad though and we always put it down to the death of his daughter when she was only 5. She died in very tragic circumstances.
We used to see him at weddings, funerals and the odd family BBQ.

On day I was on my way to my mums house when she rang me on my mobile and asked if we could leave the visit for another time as it was not a good time. I remember feeling really hurt as I was heavy pregnant and we were suppose to be going out to look at baby stuff.

Later that night I discoverd that my dad had just found out the his uncle Brian was going to have a gender change and felt that he was a woman trapped in a man's body. Well I was dumb struck. I could not believe it. I am sorry but my initial reaction was laughter. Not very sensitive I know but I could not help it. I just could not accept that this strong very masculin man was going to become a woman. I thought it was a joke.
Then reality set in. His poor wife and children what must they be going through?
It is not that I am not able to accept that this can happen I have met others who have had the same experiences, but when it is a member of you own family who you have know for years it is a real shock.

Apparently he came home from work on day and announced it to his wife, who since has had a nervous break down. He had been having councelling for years and this is one of the things he had been discussing. If you think of the emotional turmoil he must have been through. Also how hard it must have been for him to tell his family. He was 55 years old.

From this point everything seemed to happen so fast. He went to Italy to have his very strong facial features softened by having his bones shaved.OUCH!
He then went to sweeden
to have a special hair transplant something similar to the treatment Elton John had. He was put on some hormonal treatment and he quickly lost his muscle bulk and developed breasts and hips. The last part was the removal of his penis. I do not really know what this involved, I was a bit shy to ask. The whole lot must have cost about 20,000 pounds.

Her name is now Briana and she lives as a lesbian as she is still attracted to woman. In fact she is still married to her wife and loves her to bits. But her poor wife just cannot deal with the situation. Her children and grandchildren are trying to be supportive but find it a very big effort.

She lives in a flat with another group of girls, she has lost her home and most of her family.
Was it worht it? Well she obviously thought it through before the operations and decided that being a man was more hurtful and hard to live with then losing the family. Is she happy? No. She still considers suicide quite a lot and still feels that she does not fit into society.

A very sad story I think. She has been through a very traumatic period and has had little support. I think the main problem is that people just do not understand. They laugh (SHAME) and they mock and do not try to understand the sacrifices that these people must make. I wish I could help, but I do not know where to begin. Is it a mental disorder or a real genuine mistake in nature. Was he really born a she or is it a chemical imbalance in the brain like depression? I am not ashamed to say that I am as ignorant as the next person. The difference is that I can see that she and her family are hurting and this is not a situation to be laughed at. There is a genuine problem which needs as much sensitivity as any other trauma in life.

I am trying to be very careful what I write as I do not want to offend anyone or make generalisations. As I have said before, people are people no matter what gender, race or religio
n.

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