| Product: |
Football in General |
| Date: |
26/06/08 (82 review reads) |
| Rating: |
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Advantages: PLENTY TO DO
Disadvantages: NONE
I may be late writing this as Euro 2008 is nearly over however hear is my list of ten things to do apart from watching a bunch of overpaid men kick a football round and perfect their acting skills running round a football pitch.
1. Audition for x factor - you will have as much chance as winning as England winning the next world cup or Eurovision Song contest.
2. Take up a new sport - buy lots of new gear for that sport and within three weeks you find your new sports equipment is back in your wardrobe to be used never again. If you haven't guessed the sport is tennis.
3. Learn to dance - go to your local salsa dance class with high hopes of being the next Spanish version of our own Fred Astaire and discover you have got two left feet, sweat like a pig and dance like your drunken Nan at a wedding.
4. Get every box set out on DVD for 24 - after two weeks of non stop 24 you're a quivering wreck as you haven't turned your TV off in 2 weeks, haven't slept and have become paranoid that your next door neighbour is a government agent watching you. To make matters worse two months later you discover you can't afford to pay your electric bill when it arrives.
5. Learn a new language - after years of wanting to learn a new language you finally decide to take the plunge and order that 10 disc easy to learn Russian in 2 weeks language DVD course from the Mickey take language company. Six months later you discover you're about as good as speaking Russian as Sean Connery was in the hunt for Red October".
6. Discover the joys of reading by reading every play William Shakespeare ever wrote - to get in the part you dress up in authentic costume and go round your house reading the Shakespeare muse out loud for hours each day. Eventually you will find yourself being taken away by men in white coats.
7. Spend hours on the internet searching on your name - I know your tempted to try it and see what weird and wonderful people are out there with the same name as you and what they have done.
8. Listen to those embarrassing Cd's that you haven't listen to in years - even twenty years on Milli vanilla still don't sound like they look like. Also in this time of pop revivals isn't it time brother beyond get back together. (in the words of John McEnroe "you can't be serious").
9. Go to the shops - Not to actually spend any money but to play the game follow the security guard. Fed up of being followed by security guards in shops (not that I look suspicious with my balaclava and large suitcase) then go and stand close to the security guard and when they move you follow them. Hours of fun and exercise at no cost.
10. Go scuba diving in dangerous waters - within hours you will be headline news with details of your great escape from the floaters at your local swimming pool.
Summary: FED UP OF FOOTBALL EUROS TRY MY SUGGESTIONS
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