An opinion from a recent child (How to Discipline Children)

Member Name: Sam H

Product:	How to Discipline Children
Date:	16/09/00 (38 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: You sometimes need to remind the child that they have to do what they're told

Disadvantages: It should never be used excessively

As an 18 year old, with brothers aged 13 and 6, I have been a child recently and I have witnessed (and, to some extent, participated in) the upbringing of my little brother.

There are two types of smacking, as many other reviewers have mentioned. There is the measured and deliberate punishment, and then there is the uncontrollable lashing-out when the parent simply loses their temper. For me, however, there is also a third; the smack whose power to punish is almost entirely implicit. What I mean by that is that it does not hurt much, but it acts as a reminder that what the child has done is unacceptable, and also that the child is subject to the wishes of the parent, not an equal.

If a parent makes a conscious decision that physical chastisement is a valid way to teach their child not to act in a certain way, that is none of my, or the law's, business. I personally don't think I would, but I would vigorously defend my right to.

If a parent loses their temper and smacks a child that is misbehaving and not responding to reason, that is regrettable but not evil. Small children can be impossible, and I sympathise with the parent who cannot stop themselves - so long as this is a rare occurrence and not done in a very violent way.

The third type of smacking, where a child needs to be reminded to do what they are told, is in my opinion the most useful. It is still not acceptable to do this often or excessively, but on occasion it does no harm and may be justified.

More than anything, though, a good parent will never be able to do their children any real harm by smacking them because it won't feel right. He or she may smack occasionally with every justification, but as soon as the child realises what is happening and reacts, any further punishment is superfluous and probably counter-productive. At this stage, the principle of only using smacking as a last resort means that it isn't necessary, so don't do it. <
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Finally, I should just say that in my opinion it is *never*, *never* right to hit your child with any kind of implement; making it more painful does not make it more useful and is plain sadism.

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