| Product: |
How to Discipline Children |
| Date: |
11/07/01 (187 review reads) |
| Rating: |
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Advantages: many
Disadvantages: who knows
Indeed, this subject is one that is tough to deal with in such a short space. After all, even the Bible ventures an opinion. However, the first distinction to make is that of the case being talked about in this opinion area. A slap is not a spanking. A slap is a demeaning action that is more intended to humiliate than discipline. It's a move made out of anger, not concern and care. Therefore, whether against a child or an adult, it's inappropriate. Well, when a man's advances go too far, that's another matter, as well as another subject. Back to spanking and physical discipline against children. One thing to realize is that the goal is discipline, not hurt and pain. I was spanked as a child and I think I grew up very well. The spankings weren't done as a reaction to anger, but in order to teach me not to do the same thing again. My older brother has a son now and while he was spanked like I was, he does not discipline John-Michel in this way. He's learned that his son learns through my brother expressing his disappointment in J-M's actions. An amazing concept. When there are those rare times that John-Michel's will and obstinence is stronger than normal, time-out against the wall works too. I don't have kids yet, but personally, if I can teach my children to grow up without spanking them or needing to touch them in any way other than lovingly, I will certainly do so.
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- 19/07/01 I'll have to go back and check my op to see what I said and if I said that I think slapping is ok. I associate slapping with something that happens on the face or a body part other than the backside, which I think is horrible and very wrong. That's the distinction between slapping and spanking for me.
Regarding me and hubby, we won't use any form of physical discipline. Removal of privileges, time out, many other ways of doing it without the degradation that the physical form can cause. |
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- 13/07/01 I join jessy and leah (lol) in disagreeing with you.
There are very few parents who don't give the occasional slap/spank, no matter how horrifying this appears.
All children are individuals, so what works with one, doesn't with another (even a sibling). The method you eecsribe would NOT have worked with our son, but would certainly have worked well with (delightful and sensitive) daughter No 2 (now an Oxford Graduate).
Our method (of using 'fines') - see my opinion in this category - worked so well with all our three, and gave many 'fringe' benefits. We still laugh about some of the incidents ....
Consider it as an option when you have some 'little darlings' ... |
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- 11/07/01 An interesting distinction between spanking and slapping but I still think that physical violence against a child is wrong. The worst physical move you should make on a child is restraint if they are causing harm or damage to others. I think your brother (?) got it right with the dissappointment and wall treatment. Steve |
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