....and don't come down till you've found it! (How to Discipline Children)

Name: pphb

Hello doyoo user, You have to be logged in to use these functions... Login or register Close window

Send message to member

Product:	How to Discipline Children
Date:	08/02/02 (100 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Please Read

Disadvantages: Please Read

We all have very different opinions on how to discipline children, I believe the way I was brought up was a mixture of what I like & dislike. My mother left my father when I was around 5 due to physical violence. We moved from Yorkshire down to London to stay with my aunty, this was obviously a very stressful time for my mother. My older sister & I thought this was such an adventure (as 3 adults & 2 children in a one bedroom flat would be!)

We were then moved into temporary accommodation until a house council house came up (my father was still in their own home running up the bills & still drinking heavily). We stayed in this accommodation for around 3 years before we struck it lucky! My mother during this time was quite hard on us. She would loose her temper very quickly & over very silly things, such as not being able to find a hair band. I remember running around the house desperately trying to find one so that she wouldn’t go mad. We did receive smack’s & quite often felt we didn’t deserve them (as all children do – I’m sure my mother would tell it very differently!) My mother had a very hard job being a single mother & bringing up 2 children & a newborn baby boy (Oops – an accident!) She was only 28 at the time anyway.

We would be disciplined quite hard & usually involved a smack. I don’t think this is wrong but I think you can only smack a child until a certain age before you have to start doing other things. At the age where you take away any luxuries – ability to go out with friends, computer, TV, pocket money etc.

I did however get grounded for a whole month as I refused to go to a class detention!! How terrible was that? Holidays, nothing to do – I wouldn’t be doing that again!

So, as you see all different types of discipline exist & most work on some level or other, I was quite scared of my mother which is never the way to deal with things. My
mother is the best Mum I could have asked for, yes, she did have a difficult time & could be a right old hag (hope she doesn’t read this!) but we get on famously now & have done for years. She understands me & has supported me through many difficult times. She has brought my younger brother & sister up differently, not including smacking; if she does it is a smack on the back of the hand.

I have a great respect for my mum, don’t swear in front of her, and don’t argue back & listen to what she has to say. My younger siblings are the opposite – how did they end up like this? Was it the difference in discipline? Is it just different times? Not sure, I can say one thing, I don’t ever think my mother did a bad job of bringing us up – we know to respect elders, we have very good manners & have never been in trouble with the law or any other teenage problems. So what is wrong with this?

I don’t have children of my own but my partner & I are discussing the bringing up of children – we were both smacked as children & we believe if it’s necessary it will happen – Only to a certain age where you have to take away other things away to make them appreciate it. We’re not talking beatings, a smack, on the bottom, on the hand NEVER round the face. That happened to me once received from my step-dad, he accused me of smoking in the house & I told him he smelt wrong… oops, mistake! He promptly slapped me – not something I would do to my child – though who can say?

Summary: