Beneath the surface (How to Discipline Children)

Name: jimscreechy

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Product:	How to Discipline Children
Date:	16/04/02 (31 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Mutual respect

Disadvantages: Anarchy

This is indeed a difficult topic to debate and I feel that it is the implications that accompany the subject which confuse the true issues being examined. There are much broader ramifications to the subject of child discipline, and you only have to read the opinions posted here to see how much they vary. Issues on the morality of society, crime and violence, social attitudes all get drawn into the great whirlpool that quite possibly does originate with aspects of child discipline.

I will not go into my own personal opinion on these issues, nor will I attempt to draw conclusions or speculate on matters that stem from discipline in the early years of childhood.

I am a parent, and my son who is now twelve has not been smacked for some eight or nine years. He is very respectful and well behaved (at least when I am around) and I very rarely hear anything but a perfect account of his behaviour when he is away from home. I believe the reason for this is he learned discipline and respect for others at a very young age. It is all too easy to declare it barbaric to hit children without accepting the necessity for some alternative method of correction or accountability re-enforcement. I wholeheartedly believe that if a more effective method of control or discipline can be found, then this should be adopted. An interesting situation was described by "hillbilly" in her article, where she recounts that one of her toddlers would bang her head against the door when upset. This child is deliberately subjecting itself to pain so it is doubtful that smacking will be effective. Indeed she employed an excellent solution to the problem which involved no pain whatsoever. (I would suggest you read this article)

Smacking, beating, hitting or whatever you want to call it is an effective means of teaching a child they are, and have to be accountable for their actions. People property nature and pretty much everything on the planet, deserves r
espect. Punishment is a good method of defining boundaries. Once these lessons have been learned; and I do believe this can be achieved from a very early age without the need for brutality, I don't think that anything but mild and occasional correction is necessary.

That said, I have now come to realise that my method of discipline, though never extreme and rarely more than mildly painful, could possibly be replaced by more effective means. Until now (and I do mean until I actually read the articles posted here) I had always dismissed people's aversion to smacking as fanatical. After all, a smack is such an easy thing to administer and almost always conveys such positive results. I am not an anti-violence advocate nor do I have any real moral issues with corporal punishment, but! In all honesty I am guilty of both hitting because of my own frustration or anger and, not carefully considering if an alternative method of discipline could be employed.

Objectivity is a difficult thing to maintain, and the evaluation of principles we have accepted and never questioned is even more difficult, particularly when we have held them for some time. I think that it is vital that we do debate such issues and constantly question our motives and methods.

Eyes Open.

Summary: