PARDON ME FOR HAVING SUPPORTIVE PARENTS (How to Discipline Children)

Name: mr blonde

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Product:	How to Discipline Children
Date:	21/05/02 (90 review reads)
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Righty then, let's see, this is one of those hit or miss opinions i am afraid, i am expecting a few misses in the comments box to be honest, but i will give it my best shot. Bearing in mind i do not have a child of my own, i am only 17 after all, but i do have my own opinion on this subject!

Firstly, if my girlfriend reads this then she does already know my opinion on the subject and disagrees completely with it, so i apologise to her in advance, and she knows if we do eventually start our own family, i will respect her wishes on the matter. So, anyway, enough of that, down to business!!!!

Righty, i will get one thing crystal clear here and now, I AM NOT IN FAVOUR OF CHILD ABUSE IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM. I do however think that if a child does something wrong then a quick smack on the backside or a quick telling off is more than appropriate and will not harm the child. I think that if punishment is suitable then it should be given, I just do not think that taking it to the extremes of what can only be classed as bullying , whether it be verbal or mental.

My opinion I suppose really starts here, this is the bit where I guess it gets past the babbling on at the start! I feel that too many children are abused in this country every day of every year. I feel that there is an extremely fine line between a quick smack on the arse, or quick telling off to beating children and mentally demeaning them.

This is going to sound completely stupid coming from a 17 year old, but “when I was a kid” (I cannot believe I just said that), if I did something wrong, I got either a quick smack on the backside/grounded/told off. If I was really bad then I would have got a combination of the three, normally in the shape of a telling off and grounded. One thing that I couldn’t say about my parents is that they were not supportive of me, even though technically I was a little swine. They stuck by me and merely did their best,
and because of that I was brought up as a decent kid, lots of children who get abused go on later in life to abuse others, and their own children.

What I found in my childhood is that I was one of the misfits that didn’t quite go well with the other kids in school, and because I disliked most of them, and most of them disliked me, the obvious schoolyard collisions occurred. Anyone who has read my opinion on how I was bullied knows I got it pretty bad, and because of that then I suppose there was a distinct worry that I might well go off the rails in future life. However, I went the other way, I decided that my parents saw something in me. I guessed that I wasn’t such a bad person and that I could cope with being an outsider in school, but I would one day prove that maybe I was an outsider, but I was never less intelligent than the others. The only problem with this is that after the bullying my self-confidence is still pretty bad, even now, but I have risen above that and I did well at GCSE level, and am now doing my A levels.

What I found as a child is that I loved to read, so much so, that even at the age of 6/7/8 I had a tv in my room that I could have sat and watched all night long, I chose to read book after book after book. I went through the entire Narnia series by the time I was 8, and in fairness, my parents were always more than happy for me to constantly be reading, the only problem they had was that I was staying up until 3am most nights. The only thing stopping me from being up later was the fact that they came in and made me go to sleep. That was just it though, they never told me off, it was more just like “come on col go to sleep will you, it’s late”. I know a lot of people who used to be up late just as I was, and they would have been shouted at because of it, which is something I disagree with, any children I ever have will never get told off for doing things like reading.

Anyway,
I feel we have deviated from the path somewhat here. Back on track now, the question is, how should kids be punished, I do not see the problem with each parent having their own way of disciplining a child, I just disagree with the way people bully children because of their size and their fear of adults. Surely if you bully a child as a parent, you will create a monster that learns to hate and to abuse others. Just remember it is that monster that will one day decide on your nursing home. Do you want a nice place or do you want a cheap nasty place, as they decide to exact their revenge by using the excess money in your bank balance that is being saved on the cheap home, in order to feed their drug addiction? A drug addiction that very possibly you as a parent have caused, as they have not been guided as a child to take the right walk of life.

I have already said that there is a fine line between punishment and bullying, this line must be trod on carefully in order for the child to be brought up well. I agree with a quick smack, or a kid being grounded, they won’t harm a child and will probably make the child realise they have done wrong, and that they shouldn’t do whatever they have done again. I do not think that a child should be hit, in the sense of being kicked, punched, or have abuse hurled at them, to do that is to damage a child and their sense of morality.

I do agree with a review by hillbilly1, that when there are brothers and sisters involved, they will always fight anyway, that is just what brothers and sisters do. I agree with her that in that case if violence is used against them, then nothing good will come of it simply because of the fact that children are more intelligent and aware than they are often given credit for. On most occasions they will pick up on the hypocrisy of the event.

Anyway, this is my review, the subject is hit and miss I accept that fact, and I feel that there will be a few comme
nts that have said I missed with this opinion, all I can say about that is “Oh well, the world still turns I guess”. Thanks to anyone who reads this opinion. I hope that it isn’t taken in the sense that I agree with abuse or violence towards children. smacking is something that should only be resorted to in extreme cases (A point I know I have not made clear in the review and I do apologise for only making it now).

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