Are you addicted to Smack? (How to Discipline Children)

Name: yampy

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Product:	How to Discipline Children
Date:	10/09/00 (225 review reads)
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Discipline. It's been good for me over the years,
but there are some areas of discipline that I
wouldn't recommend to anyone. Firstly I would
need to divide the meaning of the word discipline
into two different areas, a) the practice of
IMPOSING strict rules of behaviour on somebody
by the way of PUNISHMENT, not happy with these
two words, b) the attempt to improve the behaviour
of oneself or another by training or/and rules.
I'm happy with b).

Now comes the very hard part to my opinion, my
past. From the age of six, I'm now forty six,
I have been part of the a) meaning of the word
discipline up until my early twenties. I was put
in a home with three of my sisters because of my
parents splitting up. I was in four different
homes in ten years and these ten years were maybe
the blueprint in the making of how the rest of
my life has mapped out.

Four different homes, four different regimes, all
very regimented, and all under the local authorities umbrella of 'Corporal Punishment', which is another
part of a) above which really means physical
punishment. I was badly beaten on numerous
occasions, why? well looking back I'm still not sure.
"You have to do what we tell you", this is what I
remember most, "or else". This is not just imposing,
or threatening but to me it is very abusive.

As a child being abused like this, and having to
behave in a very controlled way, was extremely
difficult especially when I new that there was not
anything I could do about it at that time. Knowing
that when I did something wrong or naughty I would
not be sent to bed early, or have a toy taken away
from me, or even not get any sweets, but to be beaten
in a way that would suggest to me now, when I look
back, that I was not being punished for what I'd done
wrong but fo

r some other reason.

Getting up in the morning and acting and behaving
in a way that was strange to me, odd and even out
of character just so that they, my guardians,
could see that they were in control. Doing things
right and getting punished for it is what strikes
me to be my best recollection of them bad old
days of discipline. As the years have gone by my
opposition to 'corporal punishment', which to me
is physical abuse has grown to a point that
could not get any stronger.

Any kind of punishment that involves smacking,
slapping or any other sorts of physical abuse
is totally and utterly unacceptable. To punish
someone for not having the same views as oneself
seems to be the crux of what a dictator would
believe in. To teach is not to punish.

My children have, all five of them, had a violent
free upbringing and all because of 'RESPECT' my
favourite word, give respect at an early age and
you will never look back, like I have done. They
make me feel very proud as to how they have turned
out. Love, respect and understanding pays in the end.

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