Hindu marriage (Marriage - Is it outdated?)

Member Name: dipika_suresh

Product:	Marriage - Is it outdated?
Date:	25/09/01 (79 review reads)
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MAGNIFICENCE OF HINDU MARRIAGE

A Hindu wedding ceremony is a solemn and religious occasion just as in other cultures. The large crowds which attend these lavish events in the
'marriage season' may be a bit talkative and restless, but always scintillate with so much feminine glamour and radiance all around.

Besides the rituals performed by the bride, bridegroom and their respective parents and close relatives, the priest most importantly reads mantras (
verses ) from the holy scripture, Vedas, which were originally written in Sanskrit (cf the Latin sometimes still used in Catholic churches ).

The priest uses the following substances in the ceremonies:

Fresh flowers - to signify beauty;
Coconut - to signify fertility;
Rice, jaggery and other grains - to signify the food necessary for sustenance of human life;
Ghee (purified butter) - to feed the sacred fire;
Kumkum (vermilion) - red powder used for marking the forehead to signify good luck and to say that your soul (husband) is with you.

The arrival of the bridegroom's party at the venue is heralded by special musical tunes played on the shehnai (flute).

The groom's party is formally welcomed outside by the bride's family and relatives before being led into the suite. The groom himself is treated to a
ritual welcome at the entrance by the bride's mother. He is then escorted to the mandap ( the fourpole canopy where the actual wedding ceremony
takes place) while the rest of the party takes seats among the audience.

The groom is accompanied to the mandap by the best man and also a young girl, usually his sister, cousin or niece. Her job is to keep on shaking a
small, metal pot, covered with a white cloth, containing coins and betelnut. The jingle is supposed to keep the groom awake during the ceremony. In
olden days, weddings used to take place at
night, lasting several hours, and the bride and groom were very young!

The bride, normally dressed in a white and red sari with embroidery in gold thread, is led to the canopy by her maternal uncle who blesses the
couple and gives them a cash gift. Often the bride has another sari on top of her head which has been presented by the groom's parents usually
accompanied by some jewellery. White is for purity and red signifies abundance and fertility. Garlands are then exchanged between the couple.

The whole wedding ceremony essentially consists of three parts as described below.

Kanyadaan

The bride's parents perform rituals of the giving away of their daughter. This includes washing the couple's feet with milk and water to purify them
for a new life.

Hastamelap

In this ceremony -which literally means joining of hands -the bride's right hand is placed on that of the groom whilst the priest chants holy verses. At
this point a loop of white raw cotton, wound round 24 times symbolising different characteristics and virtues of human life, is put round the shoulders
of the bride and groom.

This means that these threads of white cotton bind the two together from now onwards as partners to fulfil their respective roles fully and sincerely.
Although a single thread of raw cotton is easily broken, many of them form a very strong bond and so will abilities and virtues bind them together
more securely in a stronger bond.

The marriage vows

After this a small open fire is lit in the centre and the fire God is invited to witness the marriage. Fire, a purifying agent, is also a source of energy.
Only fire can separate this bond of unity between bride and groom. The bride and the groom are joined by a piece of white cloth, one end of which is
tied to the bride's sari and the other thrown over the groom'
s shoulder.

The bride's brothers are called in to participate in the next ceremony called 'mangal fera' when the groom and bride walk around the fire four times.
All the rounds are initiated by the bride's brothers and male cousins, signifying their consent to the marriage. This solidifies their marriage and
makes them husband and wife. The bride's brother/cousin fills the palms of the couple with grains of rice, oats and leaves, which signify the four
blessings: wealth, good health, prosperity and happiness. These they offer to the fire signifying that "all these worldly possessions we sacrifice to
you because there isn't anything greater and more rewarding than your blessings upon us".

They walk around the fire four times paying homage to all saints and prophets and to God Almighty who dwells in all four directions. The
circumambulation also signifies the four stages of life, namely childhood, youth, middle age and old age.

During the first three rounds the groom is followed by his bride. This signifies "I shall follow you wherever you go-in happiness or hard times". In
the final round the bride goes in front and the groom follows, which signifies that during old age when the time for departing comes, the bride wishes
to die first and not be left as widow.

During the ceremony when the bride and bridegroom are in the canopy, they represent Lord Vishnu and Laxmi-Vishnu being the creator - and thus,
after this ceremony they have the right to carry on the family tree.

The wedding ceremony is now over and they are declared man and wife.

The bride's mother brings some Indian sweets for the newlyweds. The bride feeds five mouthfuls of sweets signifying "I am your wife and it will be
my duty to cook for you and your family". The groom does the same signifying his duty to provide for her and
their family. A prearranged number of
relatives also come into the mandap and put a red mark on the forehead of both the bride and groom, and sprinkle rice grains. The red dot signifies
'saubhagya', meaning may your husband live a long and happy life, the rice signifies 'may the heavens shower upon you all happiness and wealth,
progress and peace and may you have sons'.

Laughter and tears

At this stage some of the ladies may try and pull the groom's nose, and if one of them succeeds the groom will try to get hold of her sari. If he does
then he can demand some form of compensation. Whether he gets it is a different matter but this is done just for fun to bring laughter in the
ceremony.

It is now time for jubilation and exchange of greetings in the middle of the mandap. Relatives and friends come to bless the couple and all guests are
welcome to do this beneath the canopy

After this follows a session of family photographs and in the meanwhile the rest of the guests are invited to dinner.

When the dinner is over, the departure of the marriage party commences, which is known as 'viday'. Farewell to the bride by her parents, brothers
and sisters, relatives and friends is indeed a very emotional part of the whole event. The bride is leaving her parental home to build an entirely new
life with her husband and members of his immediate family in a different environment altogether. She leaves with tears of joy and sorrow, but carries
the very best wishes of all who witnessed her matrimonial ceremony.

This is a very long occassion abut very useful too..

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