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Should the West bomb Irans nuclear program? 

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Teach the upstarts about Nukes (Should the West bomb Irans nuclear program?)

Cammij

Member Name: Cammij

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Should the West bomb Irans nuclear program?

Date: 19/04/07 (80 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: we will show the world that only us and our buddies can have nukes

Disadvantages: a few lame non nuke countries may whine

When I was a kid one of the neighbor kids got a brand new shiny bicycle for Christmas. He was so proud of it. I knew good bicycles from bad bicycles since I was a prominent BMX racer in my youth. This bike was no where near the quality that any of the four I rode was, but this kid was far too dumb to even realize it. His family really did not have much money at all and it retrospect I realize it was a huge sacrifice for his single mother to purchase it for him. I am guessing he probably got it from some charity. I did the only thing a person in my shoes could do. I broke into their flimsy tin shed at night and stole the bike, of course there was nothing on th bike that was usable for me, the handle bars were junk forged steel, the mags were rubbish and the crank was nothing like my three piece shimano. So I did the proper thing. I raced it down the hill and launched it into the river and I watched it sink into the moonlit murky water. I simply could not allow him to even begin to think that he could ever even desire the source of my pride. He had to go back to riding a rickity old huffy with a banana seat. He was depressed for weeks, you could see the evident pain in his eyes. I even offered to go riding around with him through the council blocks to look for his bike since he assumed someone stole it to keep it. We even found a kid who had a new bike just like his that seemed to be new and his mom called the police to report it but that kids mother had all the receipts and the paperwork from having it on lay away. that was just good fun knowing his bicycle was in the river being ridden by a fish and now the coppers were being called.

So what is my point? We have had nukes for sixty years and we showed them at Hiroshima that we were plenty happy to use them, now 60 years too late all these people come along and think that they are going to come join the club, and somehow they think that having a nuke made out of old refridgerator parts and duct tape that they can launch off a medieval catapault will somehow make them equal to Americans. We have all sorts or really cool stuff and these jerks think having some antiquated technology will some how give them status. I say light them up, send them a real nuke and show them what real nukes do, hitting them right between the eyes from 12,000 miles away.

I do not care about it being our fault that we may have caused the revolution by installing a shah in place of a democratically elected government or that we stirred up all this new wave of mahdiism by propping up Saddam so he could tar them good. To hell with them, they are just too proud of their new bicycle instead of envying mine. Nuke them now.

Why not? Because then the people over there might quit liking us? It just isn't about nukes either. If they had a good health care system or a building nice cars we should bomb that too.


**********Update after too many people thought I really think that Iran should get bombed**********
No wonder why i took a few months off. I was going to give you people a chance to learn what satire is. The simple fact of the matter is this, as most of my work is satire. What the piece does is basically eqaute the actions of Albion and their overgrown child, particularily their leaders as acting and thinking like teenage boys. I do not believe that anyone should be nuking anything. i do not write fancy reviews about ibiza or Crete because I do not go there, where I have been lately is Ukrainia to see first hand the effects of Nuclear devastation. All I tried to do is make it clear that President Bush is acting like a mean child and obviously we as democratic nations need to elect new sensible people

Summary: We should do it just for spite.

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Last comments:
duncantorr

- 07/06/07

What a pity you had to add the explanation. But I'm not sure the bike analogy is entirely apt.
freediveheaven

- 21/04/07

I totally get your review, I never realised that you lived next to the Bush family and now because of you and that stolen bike little George is pissed and wants a war, Just buy him a new BMX and we can all live safely. One with a bell on it and a basket at the front for his puppy.
Zmugzy

- 21/04/07

Ok I take your point and I also make a lot of ironic comments, satire and sarcastic humour in many of my rewiews and sometimes people fail to get the joke. But I just re-read your original review and it really is difficult to detect the fact that you're not being serious - for christ sake it could have been one Dubya's speeches! I could not see any indication in the text that you were 'having a laugh'. I've also debated recently online with many Americans who seriously hold the views you express in your review so it was easy to assume that you were another one of them. :-)

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