Teenage Pregnancy - It's all about Cheese (Teenage Pregnancy)

Member Name: sdean

Product:	Teenage Pregnancy
Date:	28/01/09 (133 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: errrr?

Disadvantages: Lose time in your youth, not able to tech your children!

So I am going to get on my soap box a bit. I apologise now if I offend anyone - this is general, and based on my personal experiences my opinion.

I have a half sister who I have got back in touch with after quite a few years of us being apart - she is 21 in April. She has 2 children under 2 years old.

Now to me she is a good mum, they have a roof over their head, the kids want for nothing her dad helps her and her fella out a lot. She has been with the same guy for over 5 years both kids are his - They are getting married in the summer. Not a typical get drunk get pregnant story. Really I am proud of how she is handling it, she suits being a mum and the kids are the top of her priorities, she did the whole getting drunk and into nightclubs when she was really young (even I was shocked) so doesn't feel like she is missing out on anything.

Here is my problem. I was with her (we live 200 miles apart) for the kids christening, she needed help doing the catering for the party as someone had let her down. So super-me comes in and sorts it all out - being the elder sister by 8 years - this is what I do!

She had a shopping list, a lovely hand written list and on this list was amongst other things - Chesse. Eh - Chesse. Roughly translated - Cheese.

The thing that bothered me and feel free to think I am picky, insane, daft was it brought it home to me how young she was. She had had a lot of problems at school etc didn't have the perfect childhood by any means. She couldn't spell cheese. Now I am not the best speller in the world, I mix up e's and a's and I's and allsorts, I am by no means an English Grad. But to have 2 children who are going to depend on you - a lot -and you can't spell cheese.
This is not the only example. She hadn't been anywhere, seen anything or experienced anything either, which was sad - but I digress


The point of the matter is, not that she can't spell cheese, is that our mum was 19 when she had me, I'd never really though of the implications of this when I was younger, just that I would be 'ready' when I wanted kids and be in my 20's or 30's. But now I'm 28, and feel quite ready. Money's tight (when won't it be) not enough room(when will we). But now I feel emotionally ready to look after someone other than myself. For a long time I said I was too selfish, but now I could see myself being - hopefully- a good parent. Above all I wouldn't feel cheated out of the 'best' years of my life.

Some women rock at bringing up children in their youth, if they have a strong support system, are made to get their own place and they live responsibly. They can be brilliant because all the stuff you should know to bring up children, which you don't and are not emotionally intelligent enough for your support system will help you cope and fill in the gaps. But if you let your mum and dad take over, still live at home. I think it is the worst thing to happen. But if you can grow up quicker than your kids - bonus, and my sister will do it, I have faith in her that both her children will be amazing. I think it was just shocking as you expect your parent to know everything

She had her first child when she was 19. I see it as my responsibility to make sure the kids don't find that appealing.

In essence I agree teenage pregnancy is awful, when you have so much life to live. Had I accidentally gotten pregnant when we weren't living together or we'd only just met or I wasn't ready I think I would have had an abortion. There are so many unwanted children on this earth- why add to it. But this is another discussion. This highlights the point that not all teenagers want babies. I think some are forced into this life by low achieving parents, no goals and the only way out is to have a baby, which is really sad. Think Shameless.

If teenagers were given more support, had great mentors and role models as well as their parents we may have a drop in teenage pregnancies and more people with goals and able to achieve what they wanted. To all the teenage parent out there, I'm sure you are doing a brilliant job, and I admire you. It's ok to ask for help and it's ok not to cope sometimes.

Thanks for reading and rating !

Summary: Teenage pregnancy - cnot all it cracked up to be !