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There ought to be a law about that!

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      15.02.2012 23:14
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      The coalitions' plan to make London into a Delhi shanty town.

      There Ought To Be A Law About That? Publishing calculations in how the current administration came up with the figure of 26K for a benefit cap.

      I was irritated where the sun doesn't shine while hearing about David Cameron's rendezvous amongst the staff of Asda. The best of Anglo- American company that has a logo emulating a happy green smiley face - claiming they put customers first, thanks to their roll-back campaigns, hereon gives the impression they're doing you a favour when it comes to an item price. Cameron pompously asked - whether it was right that people should be able to earn more than £26,000 just through benefits alone? Everyone in ear-shot or existence would unanimous say no in unison, it is not right Mr. Cameron, that benefit scroungers can morph into a sofa everyday and get paid 26K net for the privilege. No-one could disagree; let alone Asda's green army whom are on a minimal wage - all equipped with 'roll back' teabags under their 'roll back' eye lids. Why is the cap at 26K? It is as if the 26,000 is a deal-breaker for the day-time TV scroungers. This magical figure seems to work with the contestants on 'Deal or No Deal' - so why not introduce this to benefit caps? The banker offers them these semi rounded digits and they grudgingly squeal 'deal'. Maybe this magical number is a form of psycho analytical benefit deal-maker that'll work in the same means. At least they'll be subconsciously familiar with the digits.

      I can imagine the conversation Cameron had with Ian Duncan Smith and Chris Grayling; "Oh guys, its 2.26 pm, go back to your second homes and think of a benefit cap number - I'll call you both this evening asking you for an answer, after I've dealt with Hester the RBS banker, deal!". My position isn't that I oppose the cap, or want to give them more or less of my hard earned tax, but where this numeric figure has come from? How do the numbers proportionately stack up against the 280 million pounds the UK treasury gives to the poverty stricken country of India, who've already claimed they don't require the funds? This is simple math and being a transparent coalition administration after the alleged bung culture of the last administration, these benefit cap calculations should be made public property.

      In April 2013, currently 67,000 homes and counting will lose 45% of their income, at a drop of a hat. Most of which habitat children who're already worse off thanks to food and fuel inflation, brought on by the obscenities of capitalism - whereby gargantuan blue-chip corporations are monopolising consumption and energy markets. In the public sector, 100K plus jobs are a common occurrence and their wages are still rising due to none published contractual agreements in regards to bonuses - these six figured annual salaries aren't being capped. Yet, it is still coming out of the treasury i.e. the taxpayer. The problem is, it is so remarkably easy to stigmatise welfare claimants with the blame for the claimant culture they've been buried into and the alleged financial woes of UK Ltd - instead both ends of the public finance spectrum requires capping. Aren't we supposed to be in this all together? (Rhetoric incessantly used by the Coalition). Obviously not is the answer! A start would be to cap the wages of public servants such as the civil servant chiefs i.e. John Fingleton - Chief Executive Office of Fair Trading: £275,000 - £279,999 or Sir Jock Stirrup - Chief of the Defence Staff and Air Chief Marshal: £240,000 - £244,999, or perhaps, Robert Parker - Parliamentary Counsel: £210,000 - £214,999 to name a few out of (11) who've wages over 200,000 per year (public servant wages - June 2010 YouGov) - Now, if the cap went across the public sector spectrum, proportionately of course, then and only then will UK Ltd be slightly fairer.

      To make the incentive of working viable for the 'work shy' - the government has to scrap the 'minimum wage' and rename it 'liveable wage'. A myriad of businesses including Asda systematically should be offered a deal or incentive to increase their hourly rates to bring up salaries to a 'liveable wage'. Otherwise, the system will collapse under the strain of over pressurising employers and their employees. At present the chasm of benefit claimed per annum is unrealistic compared to the employment prospects for millions on benefits. Polls claim, on average by working their take home page after tax will be one third of what their benefits currently are. This is profoundly ludicrous, however 'they' didn't design this poverty trap; it opened up for them - and without any credible life guidance, or work ethic, there they exist sitting in the giant fruit bowl wilting; mimicking the entity of a dried up prune - bidding on shopping channels, scoffing Doritos.

      Miracles do happen though, the glistening bulb forehead of Chris Grayling - (Employment Minister) has a cunning plan, (his bulb forehead shining 'dimly'). He confidently states; "Workless families currently receiving payments at a level above the cap will be given support to make them understand the need to find jobs before the April 2013 deadline". You really shouldn't give up your daytime job Grayling - Are you going to get the job fairy to knock on 67,000 doors at 7.26am every weekday morning?

      Naturally we all would like a 'Hindsight wand', and if I had a 'Hindsight Wand' I'll wind back time for a few days to see Cameron conducting the Asda employees to his vocal symphony; telling the Asda green army whether it was right that people should be able to earn more than £26,000 just through benefits alone? I would shout out from over the Asda wall; "No, Mr. Cameron, it is not right - but nor is it right during austerity that 11 gold-plated civil servants should earn over 200,000 pounds each? I take it capping their wages and bonus entitlements are not on the agenda - not mentioning Simon Hester?" The double-standards would be comical if it wasn't serious.

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        11.06.2010 13:06
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        It is a mission to walk along the streets these days without being accosted by a charity canvasser.

        This 'review' will generally just be a rant filled expression of my opinion on a matter which I think should be heavily circumvented and controlled by the law - Those annoying charity workers on the streets with their clipboards.

        As I attend University in Glasgow City Centre almost on a daily basis, this involves a long walk up busy Buchanan Street. It is a certainty that I will be stopped by at least three of these Oxfam, Quarriers (insert charity name here) workers on my way up to class, in an effort to entice me to sign me up to make monthly direct debit donations to their respective charity.

        This really bugs me as frequently I do donate to various charities, but this is when I decide to do so, not because some person on the street is trying to pester me into doing it. Moreover, these workers try and coax you into a long term arrangement which many individuals including myself really cannot afford at the moment.

        On Buchanan Street alone there are around 20 of these charity workers operating at the one time, all the way up the street. Add to this the Hari Krishnas, Romanian Buskers and Big Issue sellers; you literally cannot get a minute's peace to have a leisurely and undisturbed walk along this bustling high street.

        I find it hugely ironic that these workers attempt to get you to sign up to donate to their charities when they are earning over £8 per hour for doing their job. I wonder how many of these canvassers personally sign up for the donation schemes that they promote. Also, how much of the money donated actually goes to helping people? Rather than just paying these canvassers their generous wages.

        From first hand experience, many of these charity workers simply do not leave you alone and will not take no for an answer. On many occasions when they have attempted to stop me I have politely answered "no thanks, I am unemployed at the moment", but that does not suffice for many of them who insist that you listen to what they have to say and continue to follow you all the way down the street, like some stalker. In my view, they are nothing more than pests!

        I also feel that perhaps more vulnerable people in society who may not be assertive as others may be lured into agreeing to these debits without knowing all of the facts. My fiancé agreed to donate to Quarriers through one of these reps simply to get the girl to leave him alone. As soon as he got home he was swiftly on the phone to cancel the direct debit.

        Whilst I appreciate that these individuals are only doing their job and furthering good causes. I feel that there are far too many of them plaguing our streets and pestering people who are just trying to go about their daily business undisturbed.

        I believe that a law should be introduced that restricts the number of these workers that can operate at the one time in one location. For instance, perhaps limit this to say one worker per charity operating on the one street. Surely this would be more than sufficient to allow them the opportunity to still fundraise without pestering the public so much.

        Furthermore, tougher restrictions and rules are needed to ensure that these workers do not harass and put vulnerable members of the public under duress to sign up to these payments, which many of these representatives do in practice.

        These canvassers have been dubbed 'Charity Muggers' and I believe this description to be wholly justified, as in my opinion this is a problem that is much more serious than the vast numbers of people begging on our streets.

        I am not alone in my views, as recently in Edinburgh there have been calls for a crackdown on charity canvassers on their streets and I hope that this is something that is tackled in the foreseeable future by Parliament, especially in Scotland, as in my eyes it is a very serious problem that will only get worse without legal intervention as we continue to battle our way through the current recession

        Thanks for reading!

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          21.03.2009 20:12
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          Why can't people just treat others as they'd like to be treated?

          I have decided to write this piece having made a trip to one of my local shopping centre today. To get there I had to take a bus and a train, and I cannot believe the number of rude people one can encounter in the space of a few hours. So who are the top offenders? I'll try to keep the list to a minimum or else I'll be here all night!

          First on my hit list today is mum's with prams who seem to think it's okay to run people down who might be in their path. I don't know why anyone thinks it's acceptable to steer a small child towards a complete stranger with such ferocity that everyone complies and gets out of their way. I completely understand that it must be a hassle to drag a couple of kids to the shops, but it doesn't excuse rudeness. Today I have stepped back to allow women with prams in front of me at doorways, onto escalators and infront of me while queuing to get on the bus, and not once was there any acknowledgment that I had made way for them and attempted to make their day slightly easier. I don't want a medal, but a small smile, or a thank you would go a long way.

          Just as bad are those who walk through a busy shopping centre with their head down, not watching where they're walking, or who they're walking into. These people are often so involved in texting that they fail to acknowledge when they inevitably bump into someone, let alone apologise. I don't understand why these people cannot step to the side, out of the way of people.

          Why is it that grown adults must push to get on a train? I remember being at highschool, and being crushed in the crowd trying to get onto the school bus and it amazes me that I have to encounter this behaviour as an adult. I have witnessed men push women out of the way when getting onto trains and cannot convey how disgusting this is. Equally annoying are those who are in so much of a hurry to get onto a train that they don't wait for the passengers who want to leave to get off. It's a fairly simple concept, yet there are a lot of people who fail to understand that it's quicker/easier for everyone if they wait the couple of seconds it takes for people to step off a train. Other transport offenders include those young, able bodied people who refuse to offer up their seat to an elderly, pregnant or less mobile passenger. You'll notice that these people often just pretend to have not seen the person in more need of a seat. While we're on the public transport issue, I'll briefly mention those who seem to think its ok to inflict their bad taste in music on an entire carriage. Why? I don't know, maybe I'm just getting old before my time...

          During my travels today I encounter one creature who seemed to achieve all possible rudeness offences. To describe him, he was one of those who had to wear 2 pairs of trousers because one pair had the waistband sitting around his knees. I followed him on the footpath for less than 50 metres, and in that space of time I was exposed to foul language, spitting and littering despite walking past a garbage can.

          Anyway, if I don't stop now I could go on for days I think. Seeing how people act in public makes me question whether I'm just forgetting what it's like to be young, but often it isn't just the young who are rude. It seems to be a disease that can afflict just about anyone. It's so rare to encounter genuine acts of politeness that it makes my day if a gentleman holds open a door for me. Maybe I was just born in the wrong era.

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            21.11.2008 11:20
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            Just a bit of fun for a Friday

            What a strange world we live in - we all know that there are some things that one shouldn't do (for either cultural, social or health reasons amongst others). However, it never ceases to amaze me that people actually introduce legislation to cover certain things, and I find it incredible that other people actually voted to pass these laws.

            I have been surfing and have come up with some gems - I hope you enjoy. Interspersed are some strange and wonderful facts as well. Oh, how I spoil you!

            Every citizen of the American state of Kentucky is required by law to take a bath once a year - I really, really hope that other laws insist upon on the use of a shower for the remainder of the time!

            However, in Topeka, Kansas it is illegal for you to install a bathtub - I'm not quite sure if this applies to plumbers as well. Having installed a bath myself, I don't entirely disagree with this law - I got soaked and extremely annoyed and frustrated.

            Sex always tends to rear its head doesn't it? Well, how could I disappoint you?

            In the state of Washington there is a law against having sex with a virgin under any circumstances (including on your wedding night) - I assume this law does not still exist or Washington would be a desolate place! I suppose the locals nip across the border to deflower each other then!

            In Dyersburg, Tennessee it's illegal for a woman to call a man for a date - quite right too, how forward!

            There is a town named Dildo in Newfoundland, Canada -hmm, I'll have to check this one out. Obviously someone had a sense of humour or had it in for the town.

            In a 1631 printing of the Bible, an English printer left out the word 'not' from the Seventh commandment, causing it to read - 'Thou shalt commit adultery'. This printing was referred to as the Wicked Bible - I never was religious, but I might reconsider now.

            Kentucky state legislation demands that no female shall appear in a bathing suit on any highway within this state unless she is escorted by at least two officers or unless she is armed with a club - must be something about bikinis I guess that stir up the passions of Kentuckians! But why a club in particular?

            On a more serious note, how about these punishments?

            The Romans would crush a first-time rapist's gonads between two stones - excellent idea and I bet it stopped any re-offending.

            While not as extreme, Greek men still had their fair share of discomfort when their pubic hair was removed and a large radish was shoved up their rectum - why a radish? And from I recall of Ancient Greek culture, it maybe not that much of a punishment......oops, best not follow that train of thought too far.

            Okay, so let's move on to personal habits and hobbies:

            It is estimated that around 10% of Americans have picked someone else's nose - Why? And who on earth would actually admit to this particular foible? Is it by mutual consent or do they have a quick root around the nostrils whilst the other person is sleeping?

            In Chicago, it is illegal to fish in pyjamas - what about night time fishing?

            It is also a misdemeanour to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless it's a whale - 'Quick, circle round again and I'll have another pop at it!' Has anyone seen any whales wandering around Chicago recently? - Best warn them to get out of town.

            Californian law requires that a mousetrap may only be set with a hunting license.

            It is also illegal to eat oranges in a bathtub - any other fruit apparently is okay!

            Do you wash your car at weekends? Do you use your old underwear as dusters? Come on, don't be shy. However, in San Francisco, it is illegal to wipe one's car with used underwear. I assume its okay to do so with brand new underclothes!

            This isn't a sexist comment but I totally agree with this following law (and would so for men too!) - In Guernee, Illinois it is illegal for women weighing more than 200 pounds to ride horses in shorts.

            Tennessee law states that it is illegal to use a lasso to catch fish - I would have thought it was downright impossible!

            When eating out in Memphis, remember that it is illegal to give any pie to fellow diners, to take unfinished pie home and all pie must be eaten on the premises -the mind positively boggles!

            Also in Memphis, it is illegal for a woman to drive by herself, unless a man is walking or running in front of the vehicle, waving a red flag in order to warn approaching pedestrians and motorists - Dare I say anything? I think I'd best not!

            Two interesting facts about Holland (believe me, these took some finding!):

            Do you like carrots? Did you know that in the 18th century all carrots were either purple or white? Dutch farmers decided to plant and cultivate orange crops as it was their national colour.

            Tulips from Amsterdam? Well, no actually, tulips originated in Turkey and were only exported to Holland in the 17th century.

            And finally, do you have children? Do you sometimes get a bit tired of hearing Why? What? When? Probably, and research has shown that the average 4 year old child asks 437 questions a day. That's a lot of questions (apparently 436 begin with 'Can I have').

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              17.10.2008 21:13
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              What would it be like, if my wife was god?

              Let us go back to the beginning. A long, long time ago, I, giksy21 went on a perilous journey. You see, I had a vision. Ok, so a drunken vision it may have been, but it was a vision nonetheless. My lord came and spoke to me, and told me that there was a tablet which contained the rules we should live by. Yes, my lord (Mrs giksy21.), said onto me, that I should seek out this tablet, and live my life obeying its rules.

              Of course, I done as she asked, for mine is a vengeful lord (in fact, hell has no fury like her.), and I left the very next day. Long and hard was my journey for the commandments, for as I climbed, perilously, to the top of Mt Sinai to find the word of the lord, she sent me many obstacles for me to overcome. I saw plagues of credit card bills, and swarms of nagging. At my lowest, I confess, I took refuge in a large field, with eighteen little holes which had flags poking out of them. But she found me here too, and I was 'saved' from the nineteenth hole. Lest I forget that it is in this nineteenth hole that they sell the nectar that my lord hates above all others. I don't understand this, however, because it is upon drinking this nectar, that she seems to look the best........

              Despite my trials, I found my copy of the commandments, and they read as follows.......

              1.......

              Thou shalt not covet thy neighbours ass. If thou are convicted of this, thou shalt not partake of the pleasures of the lord for a period lasting anything up to 6 of thy holy months. Dependant on the seriousness of thy offence, thou may be removed from thy testicles, as the lord uses them to make a nice pair of holy ear rings.

              2.......

              Thou shalt not steal the magic channel changing box, that operates the moving picture box. Thou shalt not hideth thine remote when football is on, lest the lord shall miseth coronation street. This crime is also punishable by the removal of the pleasures of the lord.

              3.......

              Thou shalt not start a sentence, by saying "the bum of the lord looks big in that". This crime is punishable by a blow, with an open hand to the side of thy face, as thou must suffer a pain equal to the pain that thou hath caused thy lord.

              4.......

              Thou shalt not pee on the toilet seat. Thou may not sit to pee, but thy lord does. There is no wind in the bathroom, so there is little excuse. Thy lord showest little mercy for the poor direction of thy stream, after all, is it not easier to direct a stream of water from a small hose, than from a large one?

              5.......

              Thy lord cannot have enough shoes. Thy lord needs these to live. They please the lord, and gifts of shoes should be offered to thy lord freely, and with no alterior motive.

              6.......

              Thou shalt not start a task, if thou hath no intention of finishing it. Thy lord is sick and tired of looking at that wall that was to be wallpapered two months ago. Similarly, thy lord is not pleased by the planned shrubbery that looks good, apart from the fact that the holy shrubs that thy lord brought home from the garden centre are still in the pots in the shed. Pullest out thy finger, and gettest on with it.

              7.......

              Although, thy lord is the best at tidying thy holy chambers, and ironing thy shirts, do not let thy lord suffer these chores alone. Although thy lord will suffer this for a time, she will become like medusa, producing a stare that can kill.

              8.......

              Thou shalt not lie, and say that thou are at thy work, when thou are actually in the pub with thy friends. These people are not as important as thy lord, who can deny thou pleasures that thy friend cannot offer. At least thou lord hopes that they cannot.

              9.......

              Thou must listen, when thy lord tells you words of wisdom, like "those shoes look nice", or "That would look good on me". These are clues to help you to please the lord, and are the way to her heart (and parts beyond.).

              10.......

              It is not suitable for thou to simply agree with thy lord. Thou must listen, and value her words. They should be like sweet music to thy ears, and all of the information given, should be kept in thy tiny brain. Thou may be tested at any point, and no mistakes will be tolerated. Punishment, usually would be that thou will not hear thy lords lovely voice for prolonged periods. Thy lord may also adopt a stern looking face. This is the wrath of the lord, and you should be afraid. VERY AFRAID




              Hope you enjoyed that. A satirical look at married life. None of its true, though. I love my wife very much, and she is the best thing that has ever happened in my life. I will continue to say that, as long as she holds the carving knife so close to me!

              Giksy21. 100th review. Hope you have enjoyed it!

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                14.10.2008 11:40
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                Help us out!

                So this may seem like a minor thing and I guess it will be to most people but not to me. I work in a little shop in Chester which at certain times of year, especially around Christmas gets overrun with junkies and drunks that come into the shop just to intimidate the staff...ove rthe last 5 years this has happened quite a lot of times and the problem is that we can't do ANYTHING about it. Calling the police results in a hefty wait and them saying "oh well we can't really do anything about it"

                It's really hard for all of us because we don't know how to handle it and when these people become irate it becomes even trickier, they intimidate all the customers so they leave they we are lumped with the person and a nervous wait to see IF the police turn up and thats if we are even able to get to the fone!

                So what I'm suggesting is a crack down and more attention to protect small businesses in towns and to get officers out on an immediate response to protect us as thats what they are supposed to do aren't they???

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                  05.08.2008 03:04
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                  sorry this is a bit on the long side- it jsut shows how badly things need th change!

                  saw this and I just couldn't stop myself! Laws that need to be added!! I really cant just give one, I tried to narrow this down but its just not happening, so I will add them all.

                  1. People who think its OK to play music through the speakers on mobile phones. Now this needs to change, not only is the music always really **** but its also really tin-ny, there is no base, no real beat and its just pathetic- who listens to that and actually enjoys it? It sounds bad already- its made worse by the speakers on the phone!
                  Something needs to happen about this, I could say fine them, but they are normally kids who will just get mummy and daddy to foot the bill, and mummy and daddy either wont care and will pay up cos they are loaded enough to swing a Nokia n95 phone for the brat, or they will just take it out of the rent bill and mean everyone else paying taxes pays that little bit more to cover the legal fees. Nope, this needs to be dealt with appropriately.
                  Also, the companies producing speakers to add to the phones that are portable- not OK, they are also tin-ny and rubbish and also all to easily used on buses. Its easy to deal with them, just fine them and tax them more for the speakers, they will soon stop what they are doing.
                  Kids however, need to be approached differently, jail wont work, fines wont work. What they need is to be sat on an open cart or truck which trails behind the bus, feeling every bump and swaying from side to side to create nausea, they may be bombarded by petrol fumes and rained on. In this event, they are not allowed to sue for consuming these fumes, they knew the rules before they lurched themselves onto the back seats of the bus. And if that doesn't stop them, they need to be taken to weekly operas until they learn~: not everyone has the same taste in music, in fact, speakers on a 4 inch phone are not the best way to play music. If you can call it that.

                  2.closely linked is making **** music. There needs to be a law, and very fast too. Its too easy for music managers to bang out pop rubbish and rap with irritating rifts, this needs to be stopped, don't just punish the writers, punish the people who manage and fund it, punish the music mongrels. You know what type of music I am on about- the cheeky girls ring a bell anyone? Or the creepy singing frog? Or the new found interest in taking a 1980s hit and speeding it up to Smurf like tones and replaying it on repeat.
                  These funders need to be shut in a room for a full week, and repeatedly played over and over again the music they produce, things may change, we may actually end up with some quality that way. If not then I would expect the rate of music of thins type to die a slow death, there has to by default, be better stuff out there.

                  3. Next comes people who maltreat animals, not just the idiot who hits the cat or dumps puppies in a bag in a bin, but the bigger idiots who train them for dog fighting, dog baiting (i.e. using cats to lure in dogs for fights) and people who think its acceptable to breed dogs the size and intelligence of walnuts to sit in a bag and yap all day long. Even these dogs are at the end of the day, dogs, they do need to be protected, and seeing adult women shove their faces at a dogs nose when the animal has clearly had enough is not OK. These people who maltreat animals will of course be of different cultures: someone who decides a dog looks better only when its rat sized and a person who breeds a dog to eat other dogs are not likely to meet one another. So here's the plan; they need to go to therapy groups together, or at best, one-on-one talking, they need to own each others pets for a month, starting with weekend visits, so they can get to know that dogs need to be respected, protected, loved and let to breath, they may learn something from this, if the animal is too unwell to take part, I am sure suitable alternatives can be found as this type of behaviour is rife. Its sick and twisted and animal cruelty at the moment is too exclusive, far more of it goes on then is acknowledged by the authorities. It needs to encompass far more then it already does.

                  4.Rising taxes on things we enjoy. What is wrong with this government- in fact with all government's- they all seem to do the same thing- increase the tax on things we can afford, take it off things they like. Its not fair- where are we supposed to find the money? Their pockets perhaps. There needs to be a law to protect past time and enjoyment, making museums free for all does not count, not only is it only for certain long standing galleries which you would have already seen countless times, but its also not what most people want to do to unwind after footing the bill for the tax man/government/arms trade (whoops, did I say too much?!). Joking aside, I do not smoke, I do not drink- and I cannot drive, but now instead of thinking about any of these as a way of meeting people, -the drinking at least, there's no chance. I cannot afford the odd drink now as tax has spread to everything that poor people like. That's not fair.

                  5.Public transport. In general this needs to change, at present it is no more then a cattle truck with out as much air ventilation. We need new laws, this should not be able to happen, a better idea would be to swap the cattle for the people. Put the people on the big lorries (cleaned out of course) and the cattle on the trains. This way the train companies would actually get sued for over-riding animal rights- by squeezing too many of them into too small a space, not allowing ventilation and delaying the time stated for travel. In the mean time, people travelling in the lorries will have the ride of their lives- who hasn't been thrilled as a kid with dangling your head out a window whilst your dad or mum drives down the motorway at 70m.p.h? Well here's the next step- how would you fancy I fairground ride to work- everyday! The wind in your hair, the cool breeze in the heat- who cares if the bloke besides you has no deodorant, aside from being over 2 feet away, the wind just erases the stench- you will arrive to work feeling cool, exhilarated and ready to work, not tired, nauseous and angry. And the railway service? Well if we start this off in the summer, by the time winter has arrived, there will be so many changes to protect the animals that it will be comfort for people to go back onto the trains/buses/tubes as they will no longer suffer over crowding and the change over will happen just in time for the rainy snowy winter months.

                  6.Bottled water should be free. No argument.

                  7. Sanitary wear/ products for women's menstruation should also be free, this includes tampons, towels, liners, neurofen/feminax/whatever your poison and there should be free chocolate/caffeine on that week.

                  8. Free time and free use of every gym. I don't understand how the same government that tells us all to get of out of our chairs then expects us to then take our weekly wages- that will barely cover food and public transport, to then use that money to avoid our friend and families and spend hours in a gym burning off calories we ha not been able to previously burn off as we were stuck in offices- one day out of the 5 week days needs to be allowed off to exercise, 2 a week would be great but I guess you need to be realistic- although the general consensus is to workout at cardio levels for 3 different days per week. Erm, at the current law, exactly how?! If you become better at what you do, you earn yourself a place at a more luxury gym, so its in your benefit to workout harder and aim for better levels of fitness.

                  9.Bike theft needs to be dealt with! Every bike should be sold with a GRPS chip in it somewhere- it should vary per bike and always be on the inside of the inner tubes of the bike- the more expensive the bike, the more chips the bike gets. You should then be able to monitor your bike by internet. If it separates of gets stolen, either CCTV or wherever the chip has gotten to will be followed by the police- this should be a law, there needs to be a harder law set for bike theft, and running on a treadmill in the heat of summer for the entire summer (so the thief gets no break) for what cause? Well to create energy which can be given to bike makers so they can build better and better bike security plans of course!

                  10.OK, I think I should stop after this one, I could be here all night and you may be here all day reading through my waffling! This final one is important. E bay fees. This is an atrocity- you pay to list your items fine, but then you pay a percentage of your winning again to e bay after its been won? Now hang on here, I can understand this to a degree- but e bay take too much- especially if its a cheaper item. This is doubly unfair when you find that e bay also don't do decent customer service, not reading the question you give them, not sorting out a problem and being so difficult to contact that you give up and loose cash. E bay need to be made to pay all these earning back, and not be allowed to take a penny besides listing fees (e.g. no winning fees) until they have gotten their act together, at the moment, they have not changed for years, this is because they have not had a penalty to pay, but just take a look at the brand Chanel (or was it Gucci?) suing them for not doing enough to stop fakes being sold- e bay sat up and listened then didn't they?! Maybe if they were banned from taking payment until they got a clearer working system, things would improve.

                  Summary? A lot needs to change, there are more laws to add to these but I don't want to bombard everyone- the power needs to return to the people- not the multinational organisations! Power to the PPL!

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                    25.04.2008 20:59
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                    Wouldn't you like to ask your government a couple of questions? I know I would

                    I would like to see a law that says:
                    the Prime-minister and the whole parliament must attend, with no exceptions and sick-leaves, the new weekly T.V Show "Ask Your Government"

                    It would be a three hour T.V show, broadcasted on Sundays when it would receive higher numbers, where the whole government would be on stage, sitting on their comfortable red arm-chairs. They'd have 100 cameras on them and 1000 mics , so they won't be able to even whisper to one another without the camera picking it up.

                    Every week there would be a RANDOM pick of three u.k citizens who would appear on the T.V show and have an hour each to ask whomever from the government any question they wanted.

                    I would like to see their faces sweating and them looking at the clock every two minutes hoping that the time would go by faster every time anyone asks those corrupt politicians why s***t is going the way it is in this country.

                    I am sure we would have to run an operating room backstage to save all those politicians from all the heart-attacks they'll be having.

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                      24.01.2008 23:41
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                      Think about your children, and you will KNOW that I am right!

                      I feel very strongly that there should be a law to protect societies most vulnerable (our children) from sick and depraved sex offenders for life. This whole thing of getting 4years for being caught with child porn is disgusting!

                      I would seriously and whole heartedly support a return of the death penalty for these animals. I know that that is a ridiculous and unattainable notion, so lets just lock 'em up for life. And can we please make it mean life? I mean, 15years is not life. If your son dies in an accident at 15 you don't say, oh he's had a good life though. Or your 30 year old daughter dies from an illness, do you say 'oh well darling, she had twice the average life' NO we don't!!!!

                      So why oh why is 15 years considered a LIFE sentence? It's nothing, a paedo locked up aged 25 will back grooming our kids before he is 26, is this fair? Is this safe? Is this acceptable?

                      I'm hoping the answer to the last 3 questions is NO from you all!!

                      I really really feel that we need life sentences for all our sex offenders in the UK. And by life I mean they can only come out of prison in a box!!! I do not care if they are 19 years of age, they would go in until their dying day, no appeal, no questions, no more injustices to our kids.

                      As adults you may say 'oh, well, erm, he's changed' bull twoddle!!! You are not toying with the safety of an inanimate object, it's the safety and protection of every childs innocence and safety!!!

                      Lock 'em and keep 'em there - FOREVER!!!!

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                        30.12.2007 10:43
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                        Hmm....

                        If God was a Postman, and Moses was Jess......




                        Before there is light, there is dark. And then after the coffee and the banana, the dark becomes light, Thy work is done and the day shall begin in earnest pursuit of an early finish.



                        Thou see a man diligent in his business? thou shall stand before kings of kingdoms; although thou shall not stand before mean housewives who telleth him not to walk across their unkempt gardens.



                        And verily it was told unto thee that there are rules. And the rules must be told to the masses of sinners. And the rules are thus:



                        Thee shall have no other post arrive before thou, and therefore thou cannot complain if I arrive "15 minutes late". Later than whom? thou can only see thou delivering thyne mail, thyne magazines of dubious inscription and thyne inscribed 'Valued customer' pizza delivery menu.



                        Thou shalt not watch too many daytime gardening programs and attempt thy hand at a feature of water, unless thyne budget is large and thyne owns a house, not a flat.



                        Thou should endeavour to resist any temptation to "try thy hand" at complicated garden makeovers "as seen on T.V" without proper and considered and sensible instruction from a man of more hesitant thinking.
                        Any attempt to gravel thy drive with a layer of small pebbles 8 of thy holy inches deep will lead to a plague of local cats and verily thy postman shall know your house and occupants as the 'stinks of cat poo drive'.



                        Thou shalt not build your house, nor buy a house, if your driveway has and incline of 45 of our holy degrees or greater.
                        Thy driveway is thy access to thou's Devine letterbox, and what goes down thy driveway must return up. And and down next door. And up. The people of our lands must build their houses on the flat lands, or at least fill the land in first before building thy houses. Or something.
                        Thy hath no need to build thy houses with such localised steepness.




                        Thou shalt not covet thy amount of, and regularity of thy neighbours mail.
                        For thou knows, thy neighbours signs thy selves to free magazine subscriptions in all the names in thy family so that thy neighbours gets lots of mail, and thyne postman must negotiate with thyne lowdown letterbox with 4 copies of Kleeneezee weekly updates, 4 copies of Can Opener Owners Gazette and a weekly refresh of the holy take-away scriptures.




                        Thou shall not allow thy domesticated canine companions to scare the holy shit out of thy postman by allowing it to assault thy gas bill as it peaks through thy letter box, still being manoeuvred by thy now jumpy delivery personell.
                        Thy should know that on tomorrows delivery, thy postman shall be prepared for battle and his first tactic is to hold onto thy precious letters and attempt to extract thy growling canine through thy letterbox.



                        Thou shall fix thyne f@*&g broken gate for your postman's shins are not plated with metals nor made of stone. If thy gate gets on your holy tits every time thy leaves thou kingdom, then bloody fix it.
                        Thy postman delivereth thy Giro Cheque, so thy postman knows thy is not committed to employment for the daylight hours. So what is thyne doing with thy time?



                        Thou shalt not try to build a rockery out of old mattresses in thy front garden. This, St. Malcom of Giro, does not constitute work.



                        Thou shall consider thy thoughts whilst thy wait diligently for thy canine companion to finishing curling out a holy turd. If thy thoughts do not include reaching for and collecting thy new pocket warmer, then thy becomes cursed to be observed stepping into thy fresh poo as thy postman distracts you with some chirpy early morning banter. And verily there will be laughter from afar, of course.



                        If these rules are follwed, there will be no more war, and we can all go home to bed.

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                          03.06.2007 12:48
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                          The government should start listening to the public instead of doing what they think we want.

                          There are many pointless laws in the world, why do they even exsist?

                          For example:
                          In Alabama it is illegal to play donimoes on a Sunday
                          In Colorado car dealers cannot display their cars on a Sunday
                          In Florida it is illegal to have doors that open "inwards" on a public building
                          In London it is illegal to enter the Houses of Parliament in a suit of armour.

                          Crazy you may think, but why are there not laws in place for the things that we really want banning?

                          There are many laws that should exsist and in my opinion a few are as follows:

                          ~Wages should be fair~
                          Yes, there are laws in place to ensure a fair place in employment, such as age, race, and sex discrimination. Footballers are on crazy wages, while other people who work seriously hard for a living scrimp and save for their food shopping each week.
                          I think a law should be introduced to companies to ensure that anyone working full time should get a higher wage than those working part time. This will encourage people to want to work, and those who only work 16 hours a week so they can also claim all their benefits, such as housing and council tax benefits, will actually be worse off than those working full time. It really angers me when people I know work 16 hours a week, they dont want to work anymore hours as they will lose their benefits, and be worse off if they work full time. I work 39 hours a week, and they have a better quality of life as they have more money than me.
                          Obviously there will be some problems with this law, and the only people that will moan and gripe about this are those who drain money from the government - our money than we pay through our taxes. And why do we pay this money? Oooh yes, thats right, because we work full time. I also think that those people who are on benefits should be paid by voucher ONLY, as most of the teenage girlies who think a baby in a pram is a fashion accessory should use their "hard earned" benefit money to buy baby products and child care (so they can go out and get a job), instead of the latest top or pair of shoes from New Look.

                          ~Spitting~
                          I hate this. There are two types of spitter.
                          -There is the collective group of proffessional spitters. Lads, and many girls, walk down the street normally, then you here this foul sound coming from the pit of their stomach while they create the biggest glob of mucous you have ever seen and spit it out of their mouths, making it fly 10 feet.
                          -Then you have the wannabe spitters who are having a conversation with you, and after ever sentance they spit just a little saliva on the floor. You make a fast escape from them before you are paddling your way across the street.
                          Both of these groups should be fined £30 per spit if they are seen and the money donation to charity. This would stop them, and stop old people slipping over the slippery globs all over the floor in the town centre, while out shopping on a saturday morning.

                          ~Dog walkers~
                          Dog walkers should keep their dogs on leads, unless on a beach, or an open place. I am sick to death of walking my dog and being approached by another dog off their lead with the owner trailing 100 feet behind. My dog doesn't like other dogs, why should I keep him muzzled, when I keep him on a lead? If I see another dog approaching on a lead I can simply cross the road, if the dog is off the lead it is on my dog in seconds. Twice, my dog has been attacked my another dog, once by a huge alsation, and the other by a staffordshire bull. The owners couldn't of cared less and didn't even apologise, they said they had the right not to have their dog on a lead.
                          A law to have all dogs to be put on leads in public areas, exept designated areas, so those who want their dogs off leads can do so, at their own expense. Those who don't adhere to this should again be fined and the money donated to an animal rescue or animal charity.

                          ~Groups of kids~
                          We have all been young once, but 60 teenagers on my local park, right near my house, untill midnight every Friday and Saturday night is hell. This isn't just my problem, this problem exsists on most parks, and outside corner shops in the country. They are all rowdy, all drunk and all usually fighting by 9pm. The police come, take the ale off them (this has no effect as they are usually already out of it), and move them on. An hour later they are back again. And it continues....
                          So, a law stating that no more than 5 teenage individuals can "hang around" on the streets after 9pm. Any found after that are taken home and parents are fined. Simple.

                          ~TV~
                          I think there should be law in place on TV channels to only show repeats a certain amount of times. I am sick of turning on the TV to find I have already seen almost every programme on every channel. BBC1 repeats it's programmes on BBC3, and BBC2, yet we pay a TV liscence to them. So if they break these laws in one year, nobody has to pay the liscence.

                          ~Criminals~
                          There are so many burglars, usually druggies who rob people's homes and property. Most of the time by the time they are caught they have sold any goods on, and spent or hidden the money. The vicitims of these often crimes don't get a penny back. The criminals get a little prison sentance, and are out again in a few months happy as larry. The victim struggles to find the money to replace whatever was stolen from them
                          If someone steals your car, drives it and crashes it, you have to pay for the damage yourself if the criminal doesn't have car insurance. So if they do £3000 damage to a £3500 car, you are screwed.
                          When these idiots go to prison, they have 3 meals a day, sky tv, playstations, a gym, a nice clean room, and lots of courses to attend to aid them get a job on release.
                          So... when I was at college, at the age of 23, i had to pay for my course, as I was too old to get a free education. I struggled to find the money to pay for 3 meals a day, didn't have Sky, or a playstation, or a gym, and was seriously skint. I worked 30 hours a week as well as studying to pay to live.
                          I should of just robbed a house, sold the goods, spent the money, handed myself in, gone to prison, got fed, had a nice room, worked out and done my course for free.
                          A new law taking all these luxuries away from these losers and bringing back hard labour in prisons may just deter. I am unfortunate to know of 2 people who went to prison for drug offences, and they are never bothered about going back in, both have said they have a better life on the inside than they do on the outside, so where does the punishment come in? That is the thing - it clearly doesn't.
                          Before criminals go to prison they should be named and shamed in the town centre, and be made to stand there for a few hours, with gaurds of course so people can mock them, then send them off for a year of hard labour. That should work.

                          I could carry on and on and put the world to rights, but I'll stop here. We all know these laws probably won't ever come in for force, but with the ridiculous laws I mentioned at the start of the review - who knows?

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                            15.03.2007 14:00
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                            Laws that are needed.

                            There are quite a few things that I would like to see a law against. The first thing is that I would love to see a law banning chewing gum, this stuff is just disgusting and it is beyond a joke the amount of gum you find on the streets and stuck to seat on trains and other modes of public transport.

                            It is such a horrible habit, there is nothing attractive about having to look as someone masticating like a cow on speed and then occasionally blowing the odd bubble to announce waht they are chewing, I have no desire to have to look into the insides of someones mouth, if I did I would have been a dentist.

                            I cannot see any nutritional value in having this product and the claimed benefits for teeth care are not convincing in my mind. If a ban is not possible then at the very least tougher fines for those that litter and also a community service order to clean the street as well should be dished out with much better enforcement.

                            Secondly I would like to see a law enforced for people who only use the middle lane on motorways and refuse to move over. If they are such bad drivers that they cannot use the left hand lane then they should not be allowed to drive. They are a menace to other road users and just make people more frustrated and likely to undertake which is very dangerous.

                            Driver re-education and being made to stand in the post office queue on pension day would be a good punishment as then they will appreciate what it is like to be held up by some doddery old fool.

                            Bit of a lunchtime rant I know but I felt the need.

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                              15.03.2007 10:55
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                              This country is going downhill fast.

                              The law is an ass!

                              Apparently a number of men who were sentenced to prison for murder and who were subsequently released have been paid compensation for the years where they were locked up. Law Lords (whoever they are) have ruled that they must pay for the board and lodge that they had at Prison. This will be deducted from the compensation awards. I'm not going to comment on whether I think the people are guilty or not. But I have to say that the whole idea of paying for the bed and board is simply a joke. They were found to be locked up unfairly - why should they pay?

                              Someone who is guilty doesn't have to pay? Why doesn't someone who goes to jail have to pay for board and lodge if they have the money to do so, in that case?

                              I have completely no faith in the Police and the law. It's there to protect the real ciminals.

                              The police are now just tax collectors who enforce speeding, parking and council tax payments.

                              If criminals are caught, they are normally released and don't pay the fines. Jail sentences for serious crimes are a joke. Whats the point in having Police?

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                                12.12.2006 19:32
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                                Get out of my way!

                                Picture this: you are walking along minding your own business, you have adjusted your speed to the people around you and everything seems to be fine when all of a sudden THE most annoying thing EVER happens – the person in front of you stops. Suddenly without even giving a hint that they will slow down, let alone stop. Invariably you end up walking straight into that person or throwing yourself to one side which means that you tackle another innocent bystander. A variety of this is when someone gets of the bus and then stops as soon as their feet hit the concrete. This causes everyone who walks right behind this person (usually me) to be stuck somewhere in nowhere land - between the bus and the real world. Very annoying and frustrating.

                                Sticking to the same theme, I recently was out shopping and everywhere I looked there were people with prams. I can accept that people have children and even that they want to bring them when leaving the house but I cannot see why someone chooses to enter a very small shop pushing a pram in front of them. Don't they understand that it will be very crowded and that no-one will be able to walk past them in the very narrow aisles and therefore has to walk in a ridiculous line behind them UNTIL the pram-person decides that it’s time to leave the shop and everyone has to walk out of the shop because there’s no way in hell that the person will be able to pass you? Do you recognise the type? They normally move in packs of three or more and they ALWAYS have to walk next to each other with their humongous prams and again there’s no way to pass them and if you politely ask them to please step to the side so you can pass (because let’s face it, not everyone enjoys moving at a speed of one mile per hour) they look at you with their how-dare-you-suggest-that-I’m-in-your-way-I’m-a-mother-for-Christ’s-sake look.

                                Now don’t get me wrong. I realise not all mothers behave like this, but some do and I strongly believe there ought to be some kind of law against that. Maybe I will change my mind if I ever have children but I doubt it. I have a deal with my friends so if any of us ever shows signs of turning into an I’m-a-mother-for-Christ’s-sake mom we’ll have an intervention and make everything right again.

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                                  25.08.2006 21:28
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                                  Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!

                                  There are many things in life that anger and irritate me. I really feel like a rant right now, so I'm hoping that writing this might help to vent some of my fury and prevent me from doing a "Bobbit job" on a certain young man.

                                  The following things should be banned:

                                  Nose picking
                                  Nostril penetration with the finger should be banned. The purpose of nostrils is for breathing, while that of fingers is for typing on the keyboard, turning the pages of books, etc. The nose has its own mechanisms to clean itself: hair, mucus, sneezing, shedding of nostril hairs. I can therefore conclude that nose-picking is an act against nature. While I’m on the subject, why is it that parents find it so hard to get children to eat their vegetables, when most children are happy to snack on dried nasal secretions? I’ve lost count of the times I’ve had to tell children to keep their fingers out of their noses – yuk!!!!

                                  Page Three topless photographs
                                  Until the tabloids are prepared to display photographs of hunky men with big erect penises directly underneath the gormless nineteen year old girls with big breasts, it should be banned. It’s only fair.

                                  Valentine’s day
                                  Valentine’s day should be banned, and those who celebrate it shot. It is an overrated capitalistic invention by Hallmark with the sick side effects of making those people not in a relationship feel degraded and inadequate. If you dare go into a card shop in January or February, your eyes will be assaulted by more pink shit than a flamingo convention at Jordan’s house. Even if you do have someone, it’s a fabricated day in which you basically have to prove your love. People feel under so much pressure that they propose or get married on Valentine’s day, its ridiculous! I think they should re-name it Co-Dependent Hell day.

                                  Cold Calling/ Telesales
                                  Imagine you’ve recently met the man or woman of your dreams, and they’ve promised to call. Your phone starts to ring, and your heart begins to beat a little faster. You answer with what you hope is a casual and sexy tone of voice, but alas, its some monkey with a script in a T-Mobile call centre wanting to speak to you about call plans. It is intrusive and annoying. The CEO’s who arrange this should be gathered up and dumped half-naked in Alaska, preferably during the mating season for polar bears.

                                  Boy Racers
                                  If my hobby was to run around with a pair of knickers on my head, and a stereo on my shoulder blaring shit music, people would laugh. After a while, it would get annoying. Seventeen year old boys’ cars with their tinted windows, loud stereos and exhausts, and their suspect driving skills are also funny but irritating. If they insist on drawing attention to themselves, they should be made to cycle around towns in little pink Barbie bicycles. At least then my eardrums would get some peace.

                                  Baby Ear Piercing
                                  I hate seeing babies and infants with their ears pierced, it is extremely tacky. There is no conceivable benefit to the baby, except a mum wanting even more attention by making her baby look more “cute”. Babies are beautiful as they are. They don’t need to be decorated like Christmas trees.

                                  Spitting in public – just for fun
                                  For some people, spitting is involuntary, it is almost like a fetish for them. Seeing people spit in the street makes me nauseous. Most of the time it is totally unnecessary. I remember being walked home after a night out by a really hot guy. The moment was ruined when he gobbed all over the pavement. I didn't invite him in for coffee. Haven’t these people ever heard of tissue? They should be thrown to gorillas on heat.

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