I'm not going to have the Marmite - Bovril argument here as I have tasted neither, the whiff all you need to know about that stuff, looking, feeling and smelling like earwax! These are the top ten food stuffs I have tasted and took an immediate dislike to.

--- Peanuts ---

I don't know why I hate salted peanuts but I do. I think it's that stale and sweaty smell that explodes out of the packet when someone opens a pack up at the party. In fact the whole business of nuts doesn't do it for me, those flaky bits getting between your teeth like ladies short and curlies. Maybe it's a subliminal dislike of them that may suggest I have a hidden allergy or something but I just don't get why people want to eat nuts. If I ever come to the Ciao Christmas party and you want to get rid of me then open up a bumper pack of KP guys!

--- Cracknell---

This is the sweet in the aqua blue wrapper that remained at the bottom of the Roses tin uneaten for the whole of Christmas. It was made of a glass like substance and was like trying to eat flint, guaranteed to crack your fillings. It had no real flavour and I suspect the dentist federation lobbied to have it included in the tin. The worlds worst sweet by far.

---Broccoli, Cabbage, Brussels---

As far as I'm concerned they are the same thing and boiling either of them produces a horrendous stench. They look like soggy wallpaper in the pot and slide down your throat like seaweed. If something natural tastes horrible its not supposed to be eaten.

---Peas---

If I want to eat things that taste like grass I will eat grass.

---Mustard---

There is something about the whiff of mustard that makes me want to wretch. I believe it tastes like it smells and so I would never taste it anyway. It looks like the contents of burst zits! Horseradish and Mayonnaise also come into this category, the sickly sweet smell of those very off-putting. Mint Sauce remains my favourite condiment. In fact I put mint sauce on pretty much everything I cook to give it some sort of taste.

---Jelly---

Why would anyone want to eat a jellyfish tasting like cherryade? Just looking at those wobbly things on the plate is disturbing. The thought of eating and slurping jelly makes me feel slightly odd. Don't get me started on trifles! We think we can feed kids anything when they are young and only get away with force feeding jelly as the kids think they are fun looking. McDonalds' chose a clown to push their junk food because kids love clowns. Get em hooked on sugar and fat young!

---Currents---

I have this thing about shiny buttons where if they are on their own and not attached to clothing they make me creep out. If I see a stray one I will pick it up and throw it out of the window! It's the same with currents. I can bare the odd current in a scone but I will pick the rest out and dump them in the bin or throw them out of the window to avoid that icky taste. Eating currents and raisins is like eating human friend human organs. Not that I have eaten human organs. They are in-between chewy and sticky and just don't feel right in the mouth. Ewwwe!

---Coconut---

Coconut flakes with chocolate sweets is just criminal. Eating a Bounty Bar leaves most of the coconut in your mouth and teeth still well after the event, like picking you know what from between those teeth after your girlfriend insisted on some 'ah hem' after one too many Smirnoff Ices. Coconut flakes, like nuts, should never be in the same room as chocolate. End of!


---Pear Drops---

Boiled sweets remind me of the time we had to go around me Nan's as kids. The old bureau would creak open and out would come the Acid and Pear drops to crunch on after a beetroot salad. They were designed by the same people who created that Praline sweet to get you to the dentist as quick as possible. Pear Drops taste horrible and will forever be associated with old people.

---Baked Beans---

Did you know that 96% of the world's baked beans are sold in the United Kingdom? Well not in my shopping basket pal! Anything drowning in tomato sauce is not for me. Tomato flavouring in moderation is fine but beans and tomato sauce is just yucky. They slope out of the can like vomit and just sit there like splodge. Anything that feels like sick when I eat it quickly goes on the bad list.

Ok, your turn now!