(crown) "Bring back life form. Priority One. All other priorities rescinded". (Top Ten Horror Movies)

Member Name: thedevilinme

Product:	Top Ten Horror Movies
Date:	31/10/09 (79 review reads)
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Here's my top ten for the Kensington Gore freaks out there. My idea of horror is not like Hogsflesh's idea of horror - headless men and lusting lesbians - but the safety and sanity of the more conventional and cliché. They are in no particular order although they are listed in the order I remembered them so I suppose that is favouritism of some sort...

Remember guys you can rent any five older films for five quid for the whole week at Blockbusters high street!

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Poltergeist (1982)

*****5 Stars*****

Diane: "Sweetheart, do you remember last night when you woke up, and you said "They're here.'?
Carol Anne: Uh huh
Diane: Well, who did you mean?
Carol Anne: The TV People"

Spielberg's horror classic is certainly flawed with that silly monster near the end but my word it's something special in the build up. There are so many wonderful moments here that it has to be up there in everyone's top ten, not least in the original way the young family in the haunted house actually embrace the paranormal activity for the oddity it is in that Californian, everything is a kinda cool, way. Who will ever forget the cute little girl that's not Drew Barrymore sliding across the kitchen floor and then the chairs being stacked up in the split second when mom's back is turned. When the little girl gets sucked into the telly it's all very creepy. The films curse also adds to its legend because both daughters in the film died not long after its release, one murdered by her ex and the little one from an incurable disease. The earthquake that hit Los Angeles in 1994 was centred exactly underneath the house that the film is based in for a likewise ending. It was supposed to be directed by Tobe Hooper of Texas Chainsaw noteriorty but pretty much everyone in the know say Spielberg was the man that made the decisions on set. If he hadnt Im sure this wouldnt have been in my list.

Imdb.com scores it 7.4 out of 10 (29,543 votes)


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REC (2007)

***** 5 Stars*****

Ángela: " No!"

This superb and creepy Spanish effort that came out recently is quite simply the best horror movie since God knows when for me. It really is quite edgy and claustrophobic, even nerve shredding dare I say it, as an unknown virus breaks out in an innocuous down town Madrid apartment block, resulting in a quarantine being enforced, so leaving a handful of residents imprisoned within to face the unseen enemy. The start, middle and ending are really good, unusual in horror, and the reality TV style premise and acting outstandingly real. If you didn't know this was a film early on you would certainly get freaked out before you did know. It was made and shot in real locations, and passers by weren't told it was a film so their reactions also helping its authenticity. No sets were built to make this movie either and the wobbly camera works to a treat to give it that Blair Witch edge as the power inevitably goes down in the apartment block. If you're going to see one horror film this Halloween and you don't mind subtitles then this is the one guys. Do not see the dreadful American remake, Quarantine.

Imdb.com-7.7out of 10 (26, 620 votes)


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Prince of Darkness (1987)

****4 Stars****

Head scientist: "A life form is growing out of pre-biotic fluids. It's not winding down into disorder, it's self-organizing. It's becoming something. What? An animal? A disease? What?"

Not everyone's pick for a top ten I'll admit but one I quite liked at the time as it stood out in a genre of what had become very corny indeed, director John Carpenter one of very few keeping things above the Plimsoll Line of taste. The suspense element to proceedings was a mysterious object hidden in a church pillar deep in its catacombs, Priest Donald Pleasance looking ambiguously evil as ever. What ever it is in there it had been waiting a very long time to get free and needed some humans to find it so it could use them to achieve its liberation from its millennium old prison.

The rather obvious and cliché cameo of a one Alice Copper back in the day as the head of the zombie like guardians of the church (presumably to sell the movie) didn't work but with a good sprinkling of edgy scientists geeks and some spooky planet alignment it holds that suspense pretty much all the way through. Again not everyone's choice but just one I took a shine too. I also thought BioDome was a great movie though.

Imdb.com- 6.5 out of 10 (8, 721 votes)


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Exorcist (1973)

****4 Stars****

Father Damien Karras: "The Power of Christ compels you!"

I think the Exorcist is in most peoples list because the reputation is bigger than the movie. It's a good film but not an outstanding one in my opinion, perhaps equal to its bedfellow 'The Omen' that also did huge box-office back in the 1970s.
The best scene in the film for me is the rustling in the attic as the unknown thing is beginning to stir unseen but not unheard above the little girls room by her guardians. The worst scene in the movie is the head spinning nonsense, extremely tacky when you see the film today, looking like a bad Spitting Image puppet. But what these horror films had back then was atmosphere, mystery and thought out narrative, not just box-ticking the horror clichés, that integrity seriously missing in horror films these days.

The start is very good as it mixes credible history with legend and that makes you interested off the bat, a critical trait for any movie. The discovery sequence of the relic was actually shot in Iraq, Pandora's Box again being opened there today.

Linda Blair as little Regan never recovered from playing the role and was cursed in her own way, this, her only notable performance since the ironic spoofing of herself in 'Repossessed' with Leslie Nielson.

The biggest problem with The Exorcist for me is it's a series of good creepy scenes placed in a podgy film with too much side narrative that's not relevant and drags the film out as the whole thing tires as the exorcism nears.

Imdb.com scores it 8.1 out of 10 (91, 454 votes)



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The Mist (2007)

****4 Stars****

Ollie: "We gotta discuss how we're going to stop that thing from getting in here.
Myron: What do you mean getting in? We shut the loading door.
Ollie: Yeah, but the entire front of the store is plate glass"

The Mist is classic Stephen King, the storyteller at his best, a very welcome return of form for one of horrors great writers on the book to film medium that had sagged since Shawshank. It has the classic King build up and tension as his familiar two dimensional characters surround the troubled three dimensional one, his perfunctory aloof writer, as the mysterious and deadly mist drifts over the small town by the lake in the sate of Maine (Kings home state) as the fun begins, trapping a supermarket full of locals to their claustrophobic fete. King, as ever, lives his fantasy life vicariously in the book as that very same handsome author by the lake with writers block, soon to be the reluctant hero once again. Kings ending in the book and film has to be one of cinemas bleakest and most unexpected.

If you have given up on American horror, awash with slasher dribble, dreadful celebrity cameos and unbelievable serial killers, then The Mist is for you to reinstate some of your faith in the genre. It's a horror film that actually gets all ages on their edge off their seats as the enigmatic mystery of the mist unfolds. If cynical middle-aged blokes like me enjoyed it then you are guaranteed to get into it! Well it is directed by Shawshanks, Frank Darabont after all. Guys, this should be your Halloween selection for Sunday night if you don't fancy my Spanish sub-titled pick.

Imdb.com - 7.4 out of 10 (66,120 votes)



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The Evil Dead (1981)

****4 Stars********

Shelly: Why does she keep making those horrible noises?
Ash: I don't know!
Shelly: Look at her eyes. Look at her eyes! For God's, sake what happened to her eyes!

This one nearly didn't make the list as I haven't seen it for ages. But I do remember it freaked me out some at the time and as it was the first ever horror film me and my brother rented, from 'Granada Video' I believe. In those days video recorders cost about £500 so you rented both machine and tapes. If you remember those ones you had at school that came out of the TV cabinet that teacher wheeled in and then used his feet to press the start and eject pedals then you are in the right ballpark. This was one of the films to be labelled a 'video nasty' in the U.K., alongside films like The Warriors, Driller Killer and the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, none of those making my list.
Five friends go up to a cabin in the woods where unspeakable evil is lurking in the forest in waiting. In the boarded up cellar they find the Necronomicon book and the taped translation of the text. Once the tape is played, the evil is released. One by one, the teens become deadly zombies; one raped by a tree no less! With only one remaining (Bruce Campbell), it is up to him to survive the night and battle the evil dead.
The film had comic elements (it was made into a musical in 2006!) but it was the invisible entity that chased the guys around the woods that really freaked you out. It seemed to be about being alone and facing your unknown enemy with no guns and hope, Blair Witch style. I recall it was written and directed by Spiderman's Sam Raimi, no less and only 21-years-old too.
Imdb.com-7.1 out of 10 (40,765 votes)



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The Shining (1980)

*****5 stars*******

Delbert Grady: "No sir, YOU are the caretaker. You've always been the caretaker. I ought to know: I've always been here"

I think this will be in most people's lists as it's so brilliantly made and packed full of genuinely home alone scary moments, what you would expect from Kubrik. But the threat here for the family in the old creepy hotel is not coming from an unknown force but the family itself, a clever reveal half way in, Jack Nicholson's sneering and manic inspired turn as the writer going crazy in isolation one of the best horror performances of all time, great acting and actors not something the genre is known for. The ambiguous ending leaves us all guessing as well as intrigued; something Kubrik always does in his movies on what exactly they are supposed to be about. If you're wondering where his so-called horror classic The Clockwork Orange is I do feels its somewhat over-rated and pretentious and so doesn't make the list.

Imdb.com - 8.5 out of 10 (156,342 votes)


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The Thing (1982)

****4 Stars*****

Clark: "I dunno what the hell's in there, but it's weird and pi**ed off, whatever it is".

In the 70s and most of the early 80s horror films started with the adjective 'The' in the tile. But when this came out with its revolutionary special effects that looked really believable for once the genre changed and got more sophisticated, no more the corny B-Movie territory. Special effects always let sci-fi and horror down when done poorly and when guys like Kubrik and John Carpenter got involved the game changed. Yes The Thing is an Alien copy of sorts, the polar ice cap being the loneliness of space substitute, but it's still very atmospheric and creepy. There could well be all sorts trapped deep down in the perma-ice at the ice caps and when that cones into contact with air again then who knows what it can do. Believe it or not but its star in Kurt Russell was a decent actor once and this by far his best movie.

Imdb.com - 8.2 out of 10 (68, 097 votes)


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Shaun of the Dead (2004)

*****5 Stars************


Ed: Any zombies out there?
Shaun: Don't say that!
Ed: What?
Shaun: That!
Ed: What?
Shaun: The zed-word. Don't say it!
Ed: Why not?
Shaun: Because it's ridiculous!
Ed: All right... are there any out there, though?
[looking out of the letter-box, he sees an empty street]
Shaun: I can't see any. Maybe it's not as bad as all that.
[he turns his head and sees a pack of zombies]
Shaun: Oh, no, there they are.

I know it's a comedy but aren't all zombie films in some way? The Romero Day of the undead films, which this is a tribute to, are normally subtle comic political statements on the mood of the nation at the time and this no different, in fact its only point. We haven't really seen British zombies since the Hammer Horror days and so Simon Pegg and Nick Frost, the boys that bought you the indifferent sitcom 'Spaced', had to get this right to avoid a laughing stock. When it goes wrong in this traditionally low budget genre it can be very bad, the Lesbian Vampire Killers with fellow Gavin & Stacey sitcom couple James Corden and Mathew Horne an example of. Is it me or is Corden incredibly loud and annoying and his sitcom the most over-rated ever?

The satire around Britain's apathetic pub culture of the twenty to thirtysomething is spot on here and its one of those movies you can watch again and again to see more little in-jokes and references to other films and laugh at the old jokes all over again. There is an issue why there's only one black and Asian zombie in a leafy London suburb and why the females are all hopeless in it but the geeky nature of Pegg and Frosts humour and director Edgar Wright's delivery allows for that as this is about being middle class and not Delboys. I think what was great about it was it was such an unexpected treat, only the League of Gentleman boys doing anything similar, but they sticking to what they know best with a film of their brilliant TV series. Sadly Pegg and Frost couldn't follow this up and we await the next great British horror film, The Descent and Dog Soldiers the only other contenders so far in twenty years...

Imdb.com- 8.0 out of 10.0 (113, 485 votes)


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ALIEN (1979)

*****5 Stars*****

Ash: "Bring back life form. Priority One. All other priorities rescinded".

You could easily put this classic in your top ten Sci-Fi as you could horror. Whereas Aliens (the sequel) is probably more science fiction and 'shoot em up', 'Alien' retains all the essentially ingredients of horror; the big one, being all alone with the unnameable beast the core of the fear here. The beast has no conscious to bargain with and only wants to kill and reproduce in the black void of space, a truly harrowing prefix to the movie to come. The tag-line is 'No one can here you scream in space', and the first five minutes of this superb movie really expresses that foreboding as you are soon on edge as the brilliant score crawls over your skin like bugs in the undergrowth and the opening visual images of space scream the black void of deafening silence. The sets and aliens are incredibly authentic and the art work amazing and Goudaesque, very convincing for the time this was made, many of the space ship back drops and internals made from cannibalised Cold War bombers according to director Ridley Scott on the audio commentary. Everything about is class and probably has the best opening in film, up there with Jaws, for pure atmosphere alone.

Imdb.com scores it 8.5 out of 10 (160, 456 votes)

Summary: Doot creak...