Carling, darling? (Carling Lager)

Member Name: pert_abacus

Product:	Carling Lager
Date:	06/08/09 (106 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: The beer of choice

Disadvantages: Hangovers (if you have to stop)

As a kid I didn't know any better. When I first started hitting the pubs I used to drink bottles of K cider, pints of mild & bitter. I even, and I'm kind of ashamed to admit this, bought the odd half every now & then.

It's not something I'm proud of.

There's nothing wrong with bitters if you're middle-aged & have a beard, cider is also fine if you have leanings in that direction and if you're a pensioner and can still find it then drink mild by all means but if you're a youngish man (or lady in some more relaxed areas of the country) then lager should be the alcoholic beverage of choice.

The best selling lager in the UK is Carling and in my opinion it's the only one that tastes correct from a can or a glass. If you want to drink lager from the bottle then go with Bud (buts that's a different review).

Carling currently accounts for 11% of lager sold in the UK.

You can buy cans of assorted sizes up to 500ml and you can also buy it in bottles but you shouldn't.

Your bog standard Carling is 4.2% (I'm going from memory on that though & as I only look at the cans when consuming the cans that figure might be slightly blurred) but you can also buy Carling Premier which is 4.7% & keeps it's head or C2 which is a low alcohol version at 2% for ladies and drivers and such types.

Carling also contains calories but I don't know how many. It's actually pointless weighing up the calorie count for lagers because chances are that if you drink enough of it you'll also be tempted to consume any old junk - bar snacks such as peanuts & crisps, a kebab on the way home, pizza, the saliva of that funny looking bird at the bar who's giving you the eye etc

On the plus side though, for those dieting by consuming enough in the evening you can make sure that you're body won't be willing to accept any calories the following day. Have fun at night, diet in the daytime, it's win-win!

A common myth about lager & alcohol in general is that it dehydrates you. This is rubbish. It's in liquid form. What actually dehydrates you & leads to hangovers is stopping drinking. You keep a steady flow of lager going down your throat & you can't dehydrate. You stop though & do something foolhardy like sleep for a few hours & bingo you're dry as a bone with a throat like a badgers backside.

No I don't want to make you cry but you should also be aware that alcohol is a depressant so if you want to drink responsibly don't drink it with boring negative people or they'll bring you down....

Carling is the perfect lager because at 4.2% (or thereabouts) it's strong enough to keep you merry but not so strong that you'll get yourself into trouble. There's a reason why a certain stronger lager is colloquially named 'wife-beater' but if you drink Carling responsibly (eg don't nick / spill someone else pint) you won't be the one causing trouble.

The taste of Carling is clean & refreshing. Some lagers are a bit cloying or overly fizzy but not Carling, this might be because it's brewed from 100% barley but as I'm not in the brewing game I couldn't say.

So when's the best time to drink it? Opinions vary but here's a quick rundown of my favourite times to crack open a can or stroll to the bar:

1) At a festival - sitting/ standing in the sunshine, listening to a top band whilst swigging from a can.
2) Watching the footie at home or down the pub. Carling & footie go hand in hand so well that watching a match without it just feels wrong.
3) Wetting the baby's head.
4) Toasting a marriage - at my wedding the women had champagne in their flutes, the men had Carling
5) Celebrating a win at football / bingo / tiddlywinks.
6) At a barbecue. Hot, semi-cooked meat washed down with Carling - can't beat it.
7) Mondays
8) Tuesdays
9) Thursdays
10) Fridays
11) Saturdays
12) Sundays
13) In the AM
14) In the PM
15) Wednesdays.


When not to drink Carling:
1) When you've got to drive
2) Erm....

This review is now also badly written on Ciao under the same daft user name

Summary: Drink!