Needs the following label: Warning! Any Positive Pathetic Fallacy Is in Imminent Danger (Carlsberg Lager)

Member Name: Bruceybonus

Product:	Carlsberg Lager
Date:	05/09/08 (48 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Doesn't kill you

Disadvantages: "Watery" unsatisfying, unrefreshing, dissappointing beverage action

Me and some mates recently travelled to devon for a holiday at my mate's dad's house. We went out on the boat for a wakeboarding and ringo sesh and then returned to the harbour - knackered but warming up and dutifully sorted all the gear and boat out.

Coincidently there's a nice looking inviting bar (with a name that irriatingly escapes me) just to the left of the top of the slipway.

"Ooh, fancy a nice pint lads", I said.

"Ooh, that would be nice Bruce", they said.

So off I stroll towards the welcoming open fronted bar with cheery barman inside.

As it happened, the only lager available was Carlsberg.

"I geuss that'll be the one then!", I said

So, as you do, I dipped into my pocket and forked out 15 odd quid (five of us were there) and grabbed the drinks plus some salted peanuts and some complimentary olives to go with - Nice touch.

So we sat down and a table outside the bar looking across to the peer with the sun setting with a clear blue sky, a light breeze and wet hair.

Unfortunately, this optimistic pathetic fallacy will nw be spoiled.

"This is pretty much malty water", said Jack (An enthusiastic and appreciative alcoholic beverage sampler/more commonly known as a piss'ead).

This view was then cemented as the rest of us took a hearty pessimistic swig.

"Ahh man, I hate watery beer", I said.

Draught beer is supposed to be the most refreshing tasty taste bud tingling and satisfying version of beer there is.
But to my dismay this general philosophy was disregarded by "probably the best lager in the world"...(if you like it watery, yes)

But I remained well opinionated of this lager, having had the bottled version which well down without complaint, and defiantly blamed the pub of watering down the beer to get more for their money. After necking the so called lagers, having a chat and what not, we left the harbour and wandered back into to town.

It wasn't until a week later I was unknowingly bought the same drink by an offereng friend and the same reaction as mentioned above ensued. This may have been bad luck and was another dodgy pub (presuming the last one was) but my confidence was inevitably shattered.

Thus I am very sad to say I am conciously steering well clear of this most unjustifiably boastful beverage in the world.

It's foreign brother - Export however - is in a different class.

If I were from the homeland of Carlsberg I'd export all this stuff and keep the "Export" for myself!

Summary: This amount of unjustifiable boasting should be illegal