Fosters: My chemical tasting romance (Fosters Lager)

Member Name: azwethinkweizt

Product:	Fosters Lager
Date:	02/04/09 (116 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: It helps you burp the alphabet.

Disadvantages: Everything else about it.

I know it says 4.9 percent up there, but that's not usually the strength we get it here. Either way, I'm going to review this 'lager' as a cautionary tale to people not yet familiar with Fosters...

For some reason in the UK we tend to drink really awful lagers like Fosters and Carling in large amounts. It might be because it's cheap, it might be because it's constantly in our faces and we've been conditioned into thinking it's not like drinking watery metal... whatever the reason, here's the truth:

It's fizzy. Like, really fizzy as if you just swallowed a pocket of wet air. If you're drinking Fosters from the can *shudder* then the liquid actually evaporates in your mouth before you can swallow it and you just swallow some tinny bubbles. You'll then spend about half an hour burping for each can... that's 6 hours of burping for 12 cans (I don't think anyone could drink that much fosters, though).

The taste is a bit like chemicals, water and fizzy metal. There might be a hint of yeast in there, but it's the kind of yeasty taste that you wouldn't even feed to a duck you hated if it were made into bread.

The packaging suggests that Australians actually drink it, but somehow I don't think anyone over there does. It's probably a joke to them and embarassing that Fosters claim "Brits drink over 30 pints of the Amber Nectar every second". I'm sure they just pulled that out of their asses, though.

I went through this whole thing without any jokes about the amber nectar and urine.

Summary: I really don't like Fosters.