Luke, come to the dark side...... (Tia Maria)

Member Name: KatiePuckrik

Product:	Tia Maria
Date:	19/12/07 (139 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Tastes lovely and price wise is good.

Disadvantages: Not wise to drink neat

The origins of this opinion date back to New years eve 2002. It was a night where I couldn't possibly lose! I was kitted out in my best clothes. I smelt great, I felt great and I looked great! I was going to club Hertforshire, UK. I was getting a lift with someone who didn't drink alcohol! Which meant a lift back as well! I knew this night was going to go well.

The first action of night was to enter the club and make a beeline to the bar! I ordered every single alcoholic drink I could possibly think of! By the time I was totally inebriated, I had run out of ideas. I couldn't think of anything to order (this could be due to the fact that I had the all the mental ability of a dead mongoose). Then I saw my salvation!

It was sitting pretty behind the bar. It was unopened. A virgin bottle of Tia Maria (TM)! The packaging was kind of distinctive. Red on brown sounded like a ghastly combo, but it worked! Eye catching. I had heard of this drink before but I never thought to try some. Now seemed like a good as any time! Trouble is, I didn't how to drink it. What mixers do you use? Using the wrong mixer can be disasterous; anyone who's mixed Baileys and Red bull will testify to that (and yes! It was horrible!).

This was where my friend elucidated me. He gave me the whole lowdown on this drink. Now, apparently, Tia Maria has a distinctly sweet, almost chocolately taste. It comes from the carribean and is very popular. It is quite difficult to pin-point the taste as it is very unique. It is quite sugary so alert you dentist before ingesting! I'm not willing to dispute as it probably does taste like that. But you have to understand, that I was drunk! It could have tasted like the inside of a wrestler's jockstrap for all I cared!

I tried TM with coke, lemonade, diet coke, more TM. Hell, I would have mixed it with tea if the barperson sold it behind the bar! Then, boredom set in. I'm just drinking a straight "spirit and mixer" drink! Is there anything more exciting? Then. barman, leaned over and started to tell us a few cocktails. Now due to my shocking state, I could only remember a few! Here are the cocktails:-

Black Russian:
1 shot Vodka (preferably Smirnoff)
1 shot Tia Maria
2 dashes of coke

This is a simple concoction. Really it just tastes like a TM and coke, because the vodka is tastless and blend easily into the drink without you noticing. Almost like a spike in a drink.

White Russian:
1 shot vodka (preferably Smirnoff)
1 shot Tia Maria
Top up with milk.

A guaranteed ice-breaker! Every one is dancing with their cokes, lemonades and lagers and in you stroll with your milk! What will people say...? Tastes nice. The TM blends well with the milk and TM because TM has a slight chocolately taste it'll be like drinking chocolate milk!

Liquid Terry's chocolate orange:
2 shots of Tia Maria
1 Orange juice mixer
Devilishly simple to make and blindingly gorgeous in taste! The chocolately taste mixes with the OJ to form a chocolate orange taste. Also known as "smarties".

After a few of these, I lost track of the night. All I remember was sitting in my mates car, munching on a bag of chips while chatting to a pleasant american girl.
TM is quite anomalous in that for a drink with such a distinct flavour it can be mixed in quite a few cocktails. I thoroughly recommend TM if you're going on a night out. You can make many different cocktails out this one drink. the only drawback to TM is that drinking it neat, feels a bit odd. On its own, TM is lacking a certain flavour. Without a mixer it feels kind of naked. I don't think TM would break into the alcopops market and it would be too sickly and sweet. The overall taste, is quite smooth and refined. There's no alcoholic "kick back" which will have you sucking you teeth and possibly wincing a little (see "neat Whiskey"). You can feel the quality and be sure that this isn't a cheaper brand of drink. I find the cheaper the drink, the less refined it is and therefore the worse the hangover!

Price is very difficult to pigeon-hole. In the supermarkets, you'll probably be looking at about £10 for a 700ml bottle. In pubs, you be looking at a £2 for a 35ml shot, but JD wetherspoons sometimes do a double for £3 (regional variations apply) so look out for those deals! In club, you'll pay over £3 easily for a 35ml shot. Since TM is a big brand it will be unlikely that they will strike a deal with your local fleapit! Be prepared to be fobbed off with cheaper imitations. Overall, don't look to spend any more than the regular drinks for shot (vodka, Archers, Malibu, Bacardi, etc)

Overall, TM is good stuff, but if you like your drinks neat...best stick to brandy.

P.S This review has been cross posted in www.ciao.co.uk

Summary: Very good liqueur