Camembert is of course one of the most famous of those sweaty French nasty cheeses. Give me Cheddar any day personally but each to their own as always. It is with some trepidation and obvious trouble sleeping that at 5am in the morning I begin writing about a cheese of all things. I swore I wouldn't do it...but sometimes you just get these strange 'urges' don't you. At least this one urge which isn't about to embarrass me like the last one involving the...oh you wouldn't want to know. Anyway the cheese...

~History~

Camembert comes with something of a shady history which has never been truly documented. There are conflicting reports of exactly how it came into being with the 'myth' of its evolution being the one which most people seem to know and which the French themselve do nothing to dispell...and indeed everything to keep going. Its probably good for business. You see the legend goes something along the lines of this:

After the French Revolution, all that head chopping, Bastille storming etc. Catholic priests were required to swear allegiance to the new republic or be exile or executed themselves as well. Naturally, stubborn as folk are, many refused and suffered this fate but still more were unwilling to die for their beliefs and ran and hid in the countryside instead. Apparently, Charles-Jean Bonvoust was one such of these priests who ran to the town of Camambert in 1790 and was sheltered by Marie Harel. He himself came from another cheese related town by the name of Brie(nasty stuff brie) and in return for the refuge given to him by Marie on her farm, he gave to her the secret of making certain kind of cheese...the cheese which became known as, yup you guessed it, Camembert.

A statue of Marie Harel stands in the town of Camembert in homage to the creator of the cheese but it would appear that this legend is nothing but a legend. Indeed there may be some strains of truth to it, but on the othe
r hand the Camembert region had been well known for its cheeses long before the arrival of any fraidy-cat priests. Numerous writers from the sixteenth century referred to the cheeses of the region in their works - Brugerin de Champier in "De Re Ciberia", Charles Estienne in his work, both pre-1570 and in 1708 Pierre Corneille spoke directly of "the cheeses of Camembert" in his work. Still, Marie Harel is credited with its birth and around the mid 19th century Camembert cheese was seen to spread through France thanks to the invention of the railway. The same period saw such things as steamships allow for better world trade but Camembert cheese still had a problem when it came to transportation until in 1890 in stepped the French engineer Ridel who created the familiar round wooden box which we still see Camembert cheese presented in to this day.

It wasn't long before other countries started copying the production of Camembert to produce their own cheeses whic his why in 1909 the Syndicat des Fabricants du Véritable Camembert de Normandie(Genuine Camembert of Normandy Makers Syndicate) who defined exactly what a Camambert cheese should be which was later backed up by the "Appellation d'Origine Controlée" to protect the flavour by the french government in the 80s, followed by further protection by the EC later on(see? Thats what those guys get up to...not all banana straightening you know).


~Manufacture~

The making of cheese is always a disgusting thing to read about and this one is no different. Camembert goes through the usual curdling, ripening and bacteria infestation which occurs in the manufacture of all cheeses...its enough to turn anyone off cheese for life to read about this stuff. Its production isn't a simple thing, taking around 3 weeks for the entire process to be complete. Real Camembert takes as its main ingredient the rich fat and vitamin content of the fresh raw milk of Norman co
ws which is heated slightly and poured into vats called "bassines normandes"(Norman basins) for storage at 28-30 degree centigrade - during the entire process the temperature should NEVER exceed 37 degrees. The cheese is curdled over the space of around 2 hours through the addition of an enzyme called 'rennet' and then ladled by hand into cheesemoulds - carefully so as not to break the curd. Here they stay for a day being drained and turned before being taken to the salting room on the second day, now perfectly moulded.

This room is at a temperature of around 18-20 degrees centigrade and it is here that dry salt and the penicillium candidum baceteria are added. Penecillium Candidum replaced the original Penecillium Camemberti which was seen to be reposible for blue mould appearing on the cheese in times past - the new one doesn't have that problem, but one may then argue if indeed it is REAL Camembert produced in this way? Well the French think so, so who are we to argue! Well from here they go to the drying room(day three) which is kept at a temperature of 10 - 14 degrees centigrade before another 12 day ripening period and then packing...followed by another 5 days of further ripening. So 21 days and it is "affiné" (refined) and ready for consumption, becoming "à point", after 30 - 35 days.

~Eating Camembert~

My own personal view of Camembert is outlined next, but those who adore this cheese you are looking for certain qualities. The cheese itself should be a pale yelow colour with a crust resmebling a thin white down, sometimes but not always with little red dots on it. It should be served at around 20 degrees Centigrade where you'll be able to appreciate its full flavour and texture but beware of any whiff of ammonia because your cheese is then only fit for the bin. As to eating it, well rather you than me, but its generally eaten on bread as with most cheeses although it can also accompan
y a good young red wine apparently. Some of the more bizarre Camembert recipes have included Camembert chocolates called "Diamants Normands" and Camembert ice-cream, created bya guy in Colombes...don't all rush at once now ya hear? Of course with a fat content of around 50g in a 250g cheese the chances are that most of us will ran screaming away from it anyway, but if you're not watching your waistline then by all means enjoy your cheese chocolates. Like I said, rather you than me.

~My Own Experience~

My own personal experience of Camembert is both brief but more than enough to keep me from coming back to it ever again. It was on a school trip to France back in the 80s that I had my first and only encounter. We were encouraged to converse with the locals, to peruse the shops and bring back something quintisentially French for our loved ones...I brought back a funky cheese in a round wooden box by the name of Camembert Yes I know they have it in Tesco now, and probably did then, but 11 year old boys don't pay much attention to this kind of thing so thats what I came back with - that and something heart shaped, sweatier and even more repugnant but the name of that escapes me. Well it (and the other) was duly accepted by my loving family with the requisite "oohs" and "ahhs" as if they had never come across such exoticness before, and they really didn't by-pass it in the local shop every weekend in favour of cheddar. My mum declined to try it because she was on a diet(neat get out), my dad made some equally lame excuse but not me...I wanted to try this exotic culinary delight despite its sweaty, smelly outward appearance.

Surely all those Froggies couldn't be wrong?

Sure they could, Camembert is quite frankly disgusting and one taste was enough to keep me away from French cheese for life. I couldn't even get my dog to touch it which surely says something...this is the same dog th
at at one time had to be trained out of rooting hungrily around in the flower beds after where the cats had...well you know. Dogs a are wonderful creatures - just don't let them lick you! Anyway, this cheese ended up confined to the fridge for weeks before just 'disappearing' without a trace never to be seen again. I have decided that Camembert is not actually something that the French theselves eat but rather something they were intending to use as a weapon of war back in bygone days and now use to inflict upon tourists as a sick joke. They are laughing at us people, and we are too dumb to realise it!

Anyway, Bon Appetit, enjoy your sweaty, baceteria infested delight..I think I'll still pass.

Thanks.