A CANDLE WITH ONLY ONE CATEGORY? WHATEVER NEXT?

They don't smell of anything, they only come in three colours and they aren't called 'Yankee' anything, so I guess that's all 'doodle-dandy'. Now you can relax, as at the very worst, you'll only get three different reviews of these, and more to the point, only one of them from me!

Like Ronnie Corbett, who only wanted ice-cream without pistachios (and NOT without walnuts), I suppose you could at a stretch review the Philips Imageo lamps that don't smell of Sandalwood, and compare them to the ones that don't smell of Jasmine.

However, I suspect that all you and the Dooyoo management might smell is a rat.

We get through a lot of tea-lights at home as we like mood lighting and hardly ever turn on the overhead light in our lounge except when I've lost something down the back of the sofa (the matches to light tea-lights for example!).

After a chat with some firemen with whom I work twice a year, it would seem that smoking in bed* has been overtaken by getting a bit squiffy on Pinot Grigio and forgetting to blow out the candles as the chief reason for household blazes especially exacerbated with every approaching Christmas and New Year.

(* Q: Do you smoke in bed? A: I don't know; I've never felt the need to look and no-one's ever told me I do!)

WHAT DO YOU GET FOR YOUR 17 QUID? THE LAW OF 'DIM-INISHING' REARS ITS HEAD

The LED lamps are deliberately made to resemble tea-Lights inside a ground glass tube. On the inside of the tube near the base, there's an LED which flickers ever so slightly when powered up. I have to admit that this is pretty realistic, and can prompt people to touch the tube to see if it's hot - it isn't by the way, as LEDs are an extremely efficient source of light.

There's no on-off switch visible, and you merely rock them slightly to turn them on or off. Being rechargeable, you might expect them to have some visible electrical contacts but no.

Recharging is achieved by placing them in the triple charging tray, looking rather like a drink-cup holder and magnetic induction does the rest. If you've got a Braun Oral B toothbrush, you'll be familiar with the lack of wires. Lesser UN-branded equivalents have a jack-plug sticking upwards which inserts into the 'candles' when returned to base or just run on replaceable batteries. For example, the Lakeland Shop's own tea-lights use those rather pricey CR2032 silver oxide 'button' jobs.

Coming back to the Philips' product, this does lead you to ask whether they'd be watertight too, given the penchant lots of people have for turning their soak in the tub into something moody. At least with the low voltages involved, you wouldn't get a shock if they fell in, but the lights still might! According to the instructions that came with the second lot I bought, they are 'weatherproof', note that, NOT waterproof.

WE ARE THE LIGHTS THAT SAY 'NiMH'

Unlike previous rechargeable devices, these are powered by Nickel-Metal Hydride batteries that are less prone to deteriorate with lack of use, unlike the older Nickel-Cadmium cells which 'accumulated (pardon the pun) a 'memory' making them less likely to hold a charge. Even here, with NiMH batteries, you are advised to use them at least once every three months.

Charging takes around 10 hours for approximately 20 hours of light. For some reason the blue ones only give you half of the light duration. I think I read somewhere that LEDs nearer the 'white end' of the spectrum have long been the Holy Grail of achievement for LED makers, and even now they need more current than anything nearer the natural 'red end' of the LED spectrum.

WHERE HAVE YOU GONE, JOE DIM-AGEO?

To be honest they are, well, a bit dim. There's no way that these are as bright as the average uncovered tea-light, although putting one in a ground-glass tube is not something I've tried for fear of overheating the glass and cracking it. I don't suppose the blue or red ones are any better, and at least mine give off a natural flame-coloured light.

It's just that you'll need more than three of them to turn the surrounding gloom into a 'romantic evening in', or a massage parlour. Maybe the red ones are for putting in the window?

Which brings me neatly to the question of getting some more. At first, I'd harboured some thought of getting more lights without yet another charger, but as with so many things these days, buying spares, whilst they do exist is not an economic proposition, especially given the current list price on a whole set, hence I just bought another load and have mothballed the charger unit. The second set were the half-height tea-light versions, as I thought the 'change would do me good.' These also cost £17.50 at Amazon. The charger is the same though.

CONCLUSION?

At the current reduced price or around £17 (see Amazon.co.uk or 7dayshop.com), these are a pleasant addition to a dining table, as can no doubt be seen in countless restaurants across the land. Unlike real candles, it doesn't matter if you forget about them, they'll just croak after 20 hours use needing to be returned to base.

You're going to need a lot of these to create any meaningful amount of light. Emergency lighting they are not!

Perfect for non-smokers to wave around at Barry Manilow concerts too!