It is such a hard decision (Childcare in general)

Member Name: NikkiH

Product:	Childcare in general
Date:	22/05/01 (93 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Local, Good ones are worth their weight in gold

Disadvantages: Not inspected enough

Deciding on childcare for my daughter is one of the hardest things I have ever done, and I am not here to preach about how I got it right, in fact I got it wrong, but at least you can learn from my mistakes.

My first decision was whether to actually go back to work. I have always been very career minded, especially as I was told children would probably never come along, so I worked hard to gain promotion, and I was sure after a few months at home with a newborn, I would be craving adult conversation, and the routine that the job brought. In fact, I loved the time I spent with my daughter that I had to think long and hard about my return. My husband and I discussed it, and came to the conclusion that financially, it was necessary for me to work. It was heart wrenching, especially as my daughter was very clingy, and would scream if I passed her to anyone else, including her dad.

I had 2 months of precious time with my daughter after I made my decision, and I returned to work when she was 7 months old. I fretted that I would miss out on so much. How would I cope if someone else heard her first words, helped her take her first step? I tortured myself in all honesty. I felt like I was the only woman ever to have gone through this.

Then I looked for advice regarding childcare, which I found in abundance, but there was so much of it conflicting that I became very confused, and then there were so many opinions that tried to convince me that leaving my daughter in the care of someone else would be detrimental to her development, lessen our bond and make her more aggressive even!!! Then I spoke to friends in the same position, and they disputed these findings, in fact they thought the opposite.

What kind of childcare did I want? We have all heard the horror stories about abuse and neglect, so I proceeded with caution.

I chose a childminder, as I felt that it would offer more continuity and more of a home from home feel than a nurse
ry. I called my local social services offices, and they sent me a list of registered childminders in my immediate area. I rang round a few that were full, and then made an appointment with Jackie. Darrell and I took Ellis to meet her, and I was all primed with lots of questions, but she totally caught me off balance. She was so nice, so friendly, and her family seemed so nice too. My questions went out of the window, but I would advise anyone to ask the following questions:

How long have you been a childminder?
How old were the other children you cared for?
Do you have CPR and first-aid training?
How do you discipline children?

Then most importantly, ask for references. I did not, and I cringe even saying that.

We paid £2.25 per hour, and we provided meals and nappies.

At first Ellis seemed fine, she was not very mobile, so very easy to look after. There were 3 other boys there aged 4-5, and they loved her. Ellis seemed happy enough when I left her, so I was relaxed.

The problems started when Jackie decided to take on another boy aged 20 months. Whenever I went to collect Ellis she would be sitting alone, and I would always be told she did not want to eat. Anyone who knows Ellis knows she could eat for England.

Then one night, we called Jackie,as we needed Ellis minded the next day, and she said she could not as she needed to get some things for her social services inspection the next week. I admit I blew my stack when I found out that these things were a first aid kit, and socket covers to name a couple of things. Her attitude changed in a moment, and she became very aggressive. In that moment I decided I would never send my daughter back to her. I had paid her £350 in advance for the coming month, and I could not claim it back as I was the one not sending Ellis.

To cut this long opinion short, my mums best friends looks after Ellis now for £10 per day, and she gets more stimulation, love a
nd discipline that I could have imagined, so while I would recommend a registered childminder, it has not been the best option for me.

I do have some bad news though, regardless of the decison you make, you will at times question it, and you will be sure you have made the wrong choice, but stick with what your instincts tell you. No choice is irreversible, so please try not to fret too much.

Summary: