NEWS OF THE WORKING CLASS. (News of the World)

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Product:	News of the World
Date:	17/12/01 (26 review reads)
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Advantages: Burns well on a winters day, Toilet paer if you are caught short., Summer BBQ paper

Disadvantages: Cause a riot, No news, Too much sport

More boys then girls are born during the day; more girls are born at night. This is one of many useless facts littered in this Sunday red top that make it very ignorable on the day of rest. But like its sister paper, you can?t help reading those little trivia boxes that substitute serious news and comment space.
The only time this rag becomes relevant is when they pull of a stupid publicity stunt like today?s.

They tried the pedophile nonsense before by pasting up twenty odd convicted ones on the front and middle pages with predictable underclass backlashes. %80 of pedos know the children they sexually assaulted. They were incredibly unlucky to lose their kid this way.

Sarah Paine?s parents are five hundred times more likely to molest their kids than a complete stranger.
The nature of the current sex offender?s list means that the monitored ones are often buried in the lattices of poverty stricken housing estates where vulnerable children run free.
And if you stir up the locals to the whereabouts of these girls and guys in the neighborhoods you are bond to create more disorder and drive them underground to prey on more innocent children.

But statistically the mobs off track suited morons that mill around housing estates 24/7 looking like a Kosovan field gun crew are fifty times more likely to be child abusers. Given them the green light to brick out suspected pedos was always going to generate some ignorant mistaken identity.
The idiot?s that tries to burn out Welsh pediatricians the last time they ran this line will be banging on the doors of pediatriast everywhere soon who bare the slightest resemblance to the not so magnificent seven.

When you insight the underclass through rags like the News of the World you are doing it to sell papers and not to help people you cant help cross the road from. This was and is a commercial excersize to sell copy at the time of the Whitingcase and conviction that has dominated th
is week?s news.

The police force involvement in this latest scoop beggars belief in my mind. First they have breached those peoples confidentially rights that is the whole point of the sex offenders registry. Secondly they are encouraging vigilante action against people who may look like the grainy photos. And thirdly it will drive them so far underground that they may strike oil.
Its also interesting to know that when a pedophile is vanned of to prison youngest hoards of low life?s and single mums taking the day of the doll queue to vent their thrustrations in the scumbag killers.

The guy was evil and should rot in hell in anyone?s book. But where were they when Doctor Shipman left court on the final day. Nowhere, because the people that need to show hate to appease their own guilt when it comes to possible child abuse don?t give a toss for 300 dead old folks.
This is cheap vulgar populist stuff that is deserving of its readership.

More useless facts from today?s issue. It?s impossible to sneeze with your eyes open. The sport is of course the bulk of the tabloid with the complete David Beckham shopping list from the weekend and why the British Olympic team is still as significant Lisa Tarbuck.
I can?t think of anything more moronic than reading about a football match. Oh yes buying this paper that?s stupid to.

The best bit is the on going quest to make the fat guy win Pop Idol.They along with the sister Murdoch tabloids are running an e-mail campaign to get the punters to hone him into the winners enclosure, if he can fit that is. He?s like Bernard Mannings not so little brother.
The producers are getting so nervous about it that they had to drop him from last night?s show on the excuse that he had a sore throat. In fact most of them had sore throats as the show yet again turned into a farce.

The ploy is to limit his exposure so the public get bored with it all and vote him off. But the News of the World
is gallantly hanging in to embarrass everyone in the business so they have to go through with making this guy famous.
The old syruped bandit Cowell did come up with some cracking put downs though. He obviously has a speech writer now has he slaughters contestants he was praising last time out.?Wold you be gutted if I told you you will never be a Pop Idol?. Or ?for me, that was distinctly average?.

The crumpet in here is rough to with the type of bird that puts lip stick round her nipples before she goes to Chicagos.Why cant they have some of those sexy student girl who wear zero slap and have that natural innocent look. Still someone?s got to pay Jordan?s rent.
From one big pair of tits to another, did you see the expose on Louis Theroux about the Hamiltons.Well they rate this paper above the Guardian and The Mail on Sunday as they are draped over a double bed again. How ghastly are these guys.

The only news is predictably reserved for the Leeds reserves in Bowyer and Woodgate Calling them everything under the sun because they beat up a student. Now come on guys, one or two of those posh ones do need a good hiding. My hero Paul Calf put it gracefully enough when he was frequenting a Leeds nightclub.?Hes a student, he?s looking?s it when down?.
Isn?t the biggest news of the week that a driver has gone down for a good six years for being involved in a million to one accident.
Now how the hell can a court prosecute that after Railtracks negligence and poor safety record caused the previous two crashes. Those guys all walked of with payoffs whilst a similar amount of lawyers Ganges up on this guy.

If you want serious news you have come to the wrong place. If you want toilet paper then you have come to the right place although becareful of the print running on your bottom. The magazine is equally moronic packed full of desperate celebs that didn?t get an invite to the excellent comedy awards looking for coverage.
Due to its
extra glossiness, its not advisable after a night out on the beer and curry. S**t on s**t, all very ironic.

.SERIOUS QUESTIONS OF CONFIDENTAILATY HERE.

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