Rustle Rustle (Penthouse)

Member Name: dave27

Product:	Penthouse
Date:	04/06/01 (543 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Shiny paper

Disadvantages: Normally placed a bit too high to reach in the shop, Astronomical price, not as high as I've said mind, Shows how out of touch I am

Pull up in the car ... furtive look around ... no one there ... slip out and lock the door ... sidle up to the newsagents ... damn there's a woman inside and she's got kids ... poke about in the chocolate bars for a while until she's gone ... success at last, we're all alone the shopkeeper and me and he's a man!!!

Oh no, his young teenage female assistant has come out with the tea ... bugger! Just buy a Mars Bar and have done with it!!!

Sound familiar? No, well there are only two sorts of men - those who read pornography and those who are liars ... oh yes, and Mrs dave27 says there is me as well, totally asexual and more interested in "messing about on the PC at all hours".

Penthouse is one of those very typical girlie magazines which revels in the open leg shot and rudey crude letters about things that are never likely to happen in real life (unless you're Mrs dave27 that is, on the day the gardener, Pervy Pete, comes round in his leather jockstrap - what's that, he's just keeping cool, yeah yeah yeah...)

It purports to feature other leisure features and includes some articles as well but you know those are only to keep things that tad respectable - mags like Penthouse should be firmly filed in the Do It Yourself section and come free with toilet paper, because they are just soft core porn and designed to respond to our basest instinct.

Now there's nothing inherently wrong about that and Penthouse does fulfil a valid public service (a bit like rat catching) and there are far worse examples around which should be treated a bit more scornfully, but I wish the makers would be a bit more honest about things, because all they're after is some sad gits who want to play with themselves of an evening and to pretend anything else is very deceitful.

Penthouse is the work of the porn king Paul Raymond and had little to commend it apart from pages which don't stick tog
ether...

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