- Premium reviews
- Express reviews
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- Ratings received
I have read a number of opinions already on the new super, improved, whiter-than-white, stain resistant, flame retardant, guaranteed to unblock your loo, dooyoo. Oh yes I have.... And from what I have read so far - NOBODY, Repeat, NOT ONE SINGLE DOOYOO MEMBER have thought that the supposed £8 million spent on making dooyoo better (£8 million ??? sure it ws not 8 million Turkish Lire?), has done anything other than alienate us. The site does not work properly. The site has poorer functionality. The site is slower. Oh well, you've read it all before - basically, the site is SHITE. (And 'Alkaliguru' most definately used more 'language' in his op and was right to!!) IF - And it's a damn big IF - Dooyoo possibly have any staff in decision making positions, that could give a toss about what their members think... a re-think, an about turn and a very quick bowed head 'sorry we messed it up' should happen. Otherwise it will be a massive '"Ciao Dooyoo" as members vote with their proverbial feet. Someone earlier wrote in their op "If it ain't broke - don't fix it". It wasn't broke - it is now! So WHY ?????
I must say that this came as a bit of a surprise to me. I'm not a great fan of chain Pizza parlours generally. Certainly Pizza Hut has it's uses, but 'authentic italian' it is NOT. Thus, I had never ventured inside a Pizza Express restaurant, expecting - quite wrongly in this case - that it would be another of the Pizza-clones. Pizza Express was founded in the 1960's with one humble restaurant near Museum Street, London, WC2. They aimed to offer good, wholesome, authentic Italian-style pizza and some Jazz. The link with Jazz continues today with many of their restaurants having music nights and jazz themes. Plus, you only have to look on the Pizza Express website (more of that later) to see their virtual obsession with the style of music. Founder Peter Boizot, is now a millionaire and past Chairman of Peterborough Utd Football Club. Anyway, I first found my nearest Pizza Express virtually by accident, definitely not by design, nor choice. I was booked to do some photos at a couple's family get together after their return from getting married in a far flung place. It was to be a nice celebratory, but informal affair and held at the Pizza Express branch in Bedford. I was not even certain exactly where the place was, yet, it turned out, I'd been past it umpteen times. On the day in question, I arrived and was invited to stay afterwards for the meal which the couple?s family had booked everyone in for. Literally taken over the Restaurant for the whole of the lunchtime/afternoon period on that Sunday. To compare Pizza Express with Pizza Hut would be like comparing McDonalds to a Steak House. The Express menu is traditional Italian - GOURMET Pizzas, is how it was described to me and certainly they were superb. Not that doughey, mass produced, stodgy and heavily artificial pap you tend to get in the 'Hut?' Usually there are the old stand bys in most Pizza outlets, 'Margherita', Ham & Pineappl
e, Spicy Beef or Chicken, Tuna and Sweetcorn etc. At Pizza Express you have an enormous range to choose from, like : SLOPPY GIUSEPPE - spiced beef, green peppers, onions, mozzarella, tomato FIORENTINA - spinach, free range egg, parmesan, garlic, olives, mozzarella, tomato CAJUN - prawns, red peppers, onions, tabasco pepper sauce, mozzarella, tomato GIARDINIERA - sliced tomato, mushrooms, olives, red peppers, leeks, petits pois, mozzarella, tomato (vegetarian recommended) LA REINE ham, olives, mushrooms, mozzarella, tomato AMERICAN HOT - pepperoni sausage, hot green peppers or jalapeno peppers, mozzarella, tomato NEPTUNE - tuna, anchovies, olives, capers, onions, tomato (no cheese) SOHO PIZZA - rocket, parmesan, olives, garlic, mozzarella, tomato Of course before you even make it to your Pizza, there are various 'antipasta' to kick start your evening. That first time, I was introduced to 'Dough Balls'. And before you ask - No, that was not the restaurant's nickname for the Chef!!!. BAKED DOUGH BALLS, to be precise, served with garlic butter and surprisingly, far tastier that they at first seem. Other options are the ubiquitous GARLIC BREAD - "PizzaExpress" - baked dough sticks brushed with garlic butter, or BRUSCHETTA and a couple of different Salad options. There are a few traditional Italian dishes to try if you want a change from Pizza as your main course: KING EDWARD - "PizzaExpress" potato, four cheeses, onions, parmesan, tomato HAM & EGGS - "PizzaExpress" two free range eggs, ham, mushrooms, tomato served with baked dough balls. LASAGNE PASTICCIATE - layers of pasta with bechamel, cheese, bolognese sauce, parmesan, tomato CANNELLONI - rolls of pasta filled with ricotta, spinach, parmesan, tomato Nothing too obscure or adventurous, but all done with a certain individuality that tends to be missing from your 'run-of-the-mi
ll' Chain eatery. OK That's quite enough to whet your appetite. I have since eaten at two other branches of Pizza Express in this country as well as tucking into a gorgeous meal at Pizza Express, Paphos, Cyprus - overlooking the scenic harbour. They have several things in common. Modern décor, but both warm and inviting to boot. A Very nice ambience for whatever occasion you have planned. Prices are exceptionally reasonable for the quality produced. Expect to pay around £8-10 for a pizza - enough for 2. Add to that maybe a starter or some garlic bread, drinks (or a bottle of wine for around £8) and you can have a very nice meal for 2 for less than £25. Lager lovers could do worse than try a bottle of Peroni - Nastro Azzurro, it goes down very nicely with Italian food. Pizzas like the aforementioned 'Sloppy Guiseppe' (wot? I thought at first) you can now buy pre-packaged in Sainsbury's, I notice. We had one the other day and although not exactly as good as a fresh made one in the restaurant, it most definitely rated at the top end of the scale of the shop bought variety. You can locate your nearest branch of Pizza Express at their website, or search for their restaurants now beginning to sprout up in various overseas destinations. - www.pizzexpress.co.uk
If you are tired of some of the inconsequential 'fluff' at the Cinema at the moment. Plus you are not looking at your head to be pounded in by watching some brainless actioner and you don't really feel up to a kid's film - this one might be just the ticket. And I bet you missed this when it was at the Cinema! K-PAX, was a massive hit in the States last year, and hit our screens back in April. Starring Oscar winning Kevin Spacey as the mysterious 'Prot', who turns up out of nowhere and professes to come from the Planet 'K-PAX'. Not surprisingly he is carted off to the nearest Mental hospital for 'further examination'. Here, he meets Psychiatrist Dr Powell (Jeff Bridges), who is 'sceptical', to say the least! But Powell is also sympathetic and curious about the 'alien visitor'. Especially when Prot begins to have a rather strange effect on the mental health of the other patients. Prot also seems to know far too much about 'other worlds', distant star systems and the galaxy in general. He appears before a panel of four eminent astronomers and gives them answers that no one else in the universe would know. Dr Powell, is thus faced with a dilemma. Who is Prot? Is there really a chance that he could be from the planet K-PAX ? Meanwhile, back at the hospital he reveals to Dr Powell that he is planning on leaving soon. He must return home and will take just one person with him to K-PAX. For Powell, it is now a race against time to discover the truth about his mysterious patient. Just before he is due to leave, the Doctor takes him home with him to meet his family, hoping that interacting with a real family (something he claims they don't have on K-PAX) will go some way to explaining the mystery behind Prot. It does - in fact it is more than a chink of light thrown on the truth behind Prot.... more like a bolt of lightning!!! Having watc
hed this film when it first came out, I came to it expecting an intelligent, thoughtful Sci-Fi movie. What K-PAX, is, in fact, is something far more heartwarming and real. Please do not get put off of this film by the 'Sci-fi' tag. This is a riveting, thought-provoking and extremely sympathetic portayal of the tricks the mind can play. The film's Producer Lawrence Gordon is quoted as saying that it has the same kind of feel to it as a movie like 'Field of Dreams' - which he also produced . "Both stories are about passionate men who go against conventional behaviour simply because they are believing in something, as improbable as it might seem to others. And both stories contain rich, memorable characters that are hard to find in todays scripts" It most definitely has that indescribable magic that holds the watcher. Intrigued at what the secret behind Prot is, but also hoping maybe that impossible is true, because you 'feel' for the characters. I will not reveal what the truth behind 'Prot' is. In fact, I'm still not certain myself, as my wife and I came out of the cinema with different understandings. What I will say is that Spacey is awesome as the believable, but confusing 'alien' and Bridges (who himself played aliens in 'Tron' and in 'Starman', back in the 80s) is outstanding. Directed extremely sympathetically by Iain Softley, this movie is definitely a MUST SEE and was one of the best films I've seen this year. It should be close to being out on DVD and Video - Don't miss it this time around. CAST Kevin Spacey --- Prot Jeff Bridges --- Dr Mark Powell Mary McCormack --- Rachel Powell Alfre Woodard --- Dr Claudia Villars David Patrick Kelly --- Howie Saul Williams --- Ernie Peter Gerety --- Sal Celia Weston --- The Duchess Ajay Naidu --- Dr Chakraborty Tracy Vilar --- Maria Melanee M
urray --- Bess John Toles-Bey --- Russell Directed by Iain Softley - Running Time 120 minutes
The original Rollerball movie became one of THE True ?cult? films of the 70s. However, this quite woeful re-make will most definitely be regarded as one of this decade?s real TURKEY! Well, for a start, who on earth thought that leading man, Chris Klein, could carry the star role in this Sci-fi wannabe-blockbuster? Lightweight, but nice enough dumb hunk 'Oz' from the 'American Pie' movies, Klein will be hard pressed to get a lead role again after his uncharismatic portrayal of Johnathan Cross in this one. Some would say his acting is 'wooden' - well I reckon if you searched him you?d find the mark of Chippendale on his ass. Possibly his next 'acting' gig??? Anyway, what was a well regarded and memorable original starring James Caan, about a futuristic game on roller skates, is now turned into a cross between WWF and 'Starlight Express' by Director John McTiernan. From it?s US Opening last year, it has been universally panned by critics. They are not always right, but most definitely called it correctly with this dross. For those of you remotely interested in seeing this movie sometime(and take my advice ? don't), the basic plot sees us in 2005 and Cross (Klein) recruited by Alexi Petrovich (Jean Reno) to star in his new venture - an extreme sport played out on roller blades. There are few rules - cancel that....there are NO Rules. Audiences are after blood and violence and they get that aplenty. Bribing goes on to get teams to go 'over the top', to help viewing figures. When the original movie came out, the Rollerball game was obviously based on the then popular US sport of 'Roller Derby' , with many overtones from the oft violent sport of 'Ice Hockey'. That was a well observed, acted and original piece of cinema. This remake tries (I think it tries anyway) to update and add to that legacy - but fails dismally. The sets are tacky, the costumes, frankly, plain awful
and the whole thing is just very poorly 'thrown together'. Sad too - bearing in mind the director was responsible for some decent work in Die Hard, Predator and Thomas Crown Affair. And for fans of rapper LL Cool J and sexy Rebecca Rominj-Stamos, they are both in this movie too. But, Please don?t use that as an excuse to go to see this - this will not be a movie they will be highlighting on their Showreels. There have been several movies released in the UK this year already, that have had a very short stay at Cinemas. Personally, I?m glad I did not have to pay to watch this and I can fully see why we?ve had to wait 9 months since the US release of this, to get it here. They were trying to sneak it in before anyone noticed. Apologies to anyone expecting an epic review of this movie. Sorry - it really is just not worth it. Don?t bother, Stay away, Save your money and go see something like Minority Report or Resident Evil instead. NOTE ? Possibly so bad that it will - in the future (around 2005) be regarded as a 'cult' movie.
We've done it!!!!!!!!!!!!! We made it through the 'Group of Death' and now play Denmark on Saturday in the last 16. But the game against Nigeria had more than it's fair share of worrying moments. Maybe they did have their bags packed ready for the flight home, but the 'Super Eagles' certainly ruffled England's feathers in the opening half hour. Time after time, our defence was carved open by astute passing from JJ Okocha and some nice runs along the right from Udeze. Two good point plank saves by Seaman and some immensely classy defending by Rio Ferdinand kept England from going behind. It seemed to take an age for us to get going - FORWARD. Heskey, I'm sad to say, has not found his feet in this tournament and often it is left to Owen to try and break the opposition down. Emile did manage to get a toe end to a near post cross, but the teenage Nigerian keeper got down well. Paul Scholes' 25 yarder looked destined to break the deadlock, but after some earlier 'flapping' at crosses, Enyeama pulled off a staggering fingertip save to divert the shot onto a post. I'm sure Sven must have had a few words at the interval, for, despite an air of calm, the group was loking a bit too close for comfort as Sweden were also goalless with Argentina. We looked a little more solid after the break, but give Nigeria their due - they hadly ever showed a weakness. All their players - from 17 year old (YES 17 !!) midfielder, Opanbunmi, through to former Stevenage Borough defender Efe Sodje battled well. It would need something special to score against them. And frankly, on this day, we did not have anything special - except Rio! Heskey was finally put out of his misery when replaced by Sheringham and the 63 year old Spurs striker (well, almost) got under a sharp chance from 10 yards out that was arguably the closest we came to scoring. So, the masses who missed work tod
ay to watch the game will have something to celebrate - the fact we are still in the World Cup. But the fact remains that we were shown today to be a workmanlike side with only a couple of real CLASS Players. Sadly, Beckham is a pale shadow of his best - understandably after his injury. Hopefully, if we progress further he will get better. Michael Owen is just out of luck in front of goal, but if he can hit a vein of form, that in itself could carry us on to glory. Well played Nigeria, you may be going home, but you can hold your heads with pride. And England....look out Denmark, we're coming to get ya!
Any WWF Fans out there? Well, if you haven't already - you've gotta see this movie. You will love it to death. Macho to 'nth' degree, minimum of storyline, musclebound hero with a touch of humour. End of Review.... ...well, not quite. SPIN OFF This is almost 'The Mummy Returns Again', Scorpion King having been introduced to us - briefly - in last year's Mummy 2 epic. WWF legend 'The Rock' dominates the screen as the eponymous hero from ancient times and despite limited acting talent (all WWF stars have to be actors, of course), does a pretty good job. This is NOT A sequel, prequel or whatever - it is a Spin Off from 'the Mummy' Set well before the two Mummy movies, in this, The Rock plays 'Mathayus' a beefy, sword wielding, slayer of evil doers. His task is to rid the ancient world of the threat from the very nasty 'Memnon' (Steven Brand), by removing his sorceress sidekick, 'Cassandra' (oh how original a name is that?). SEE KELLY HU NUDE ...Well, very nearly. Oriental lovely Kelly Hu takes the female lead role as Cassandra and it does not take a 'Rock'et scientist to work out that before long, she will be 'rocking' with the King. But, definitely a plus point to this movie for you red bloodied guys out there, is the fact that Ms Hu spends most of the movie wearing the minimum of 'mummification'...clothes in fact. FANTASTIC FIGHTS AND EXCEPTIONAL ESCAPES Along the way there are plenty of 'beat-em-up' scenes, even more whizzing of arrows, buckles being swashed all over the place and still 'Scorpy' (my pet name for him, because he's a pussycat really!) comes through it all unscathed. He defies death by the dozen, as even with odds stacked against him, you just know who will come out on top. It's ferocious, it's frantic, it's frankly ridiculous - BUT it's Fun. LOADSAMONEY This movie had broken Box Office records in the USA on it's first weekend of release. When I saw on it's day of release in the UK - I was one of only around 15 people in the cinema to see it. Despite that, I'm sure it has been (who said The Rock is a has-been' ??) a hit over here. The Rock has a lot of fans and this kind of hokum is often big business. I'm sorry that I really can't go into more detail on this movie. It comes at you like a 10 ton truck. It's predictable and cheesy with the action letting up only briefly, but there is a grain of humour along the way too - usually brought about by Scorpy's hapless and exceedingly dorky sidekick, Takmet (Peter Facinelli). FINAL ANALYSIS Above all, this is a vehicle for the undoubted heavyweight talents of 'The Rock' - or Dwayne Johnson, to give him his correct name. He has honed his acting 'skills' on the boards of the WWF 'wresting' theatres. He has charm, is good looking, definitely has 'screen presence' and certainly packs a 'punch' or two. He will be the next action hero to dominate our screens and follow in the meaty footsteps of such 'thespian' talents as Schwarzenegger, Seagal, Van Damme et al. He is the next 'Arnie' - He WILL Be back. You'd better believe it. ~~ Please be warned - there will be no Oscar nominations coming from this movie and do not expect to have to use even one single brain cell while sitting through this. RATING - Far from a Classic. Do give this a chance, you may be pleasantly surprised - I was. (c) KEITH MAYHEW 2002
Becoming increasing peeved (not to say pi$$ed off) at the rapidly decreasing numbers of dooyooers that feel the desire to read my opinions, I thought I'd try this. Write in a popular category like this new 'dooyoo crowns' one. Yeah, great idea - at last my words will be read. At last, after a mere 300 odd opinions churned out over 20 odd months, I will get the widespread recognition that my fantastic writing ability deserves. Ah, but what to say? More to the point - what to comment that has not been covered before. Maybe I could rant and moan (Oh No, he's not going to do that AGAIN!!)....no, hold on, don't dash off and read something else. Gis a chance, you never know I might be worth reading (Oh yeah - AS IF?) The Dooyoo Crown system. Don't you just love it? One of the most discussed, defiled, praised etc etc... roobarb roobarb. Yes, it's certainly been the centre of attention for pretty much all my time on this site. The main bone of contention is "How the flipping 'eck do you get one of the damnthings?" Well for some people, it appears to be easy - for other mere mortals, it is nigh on impossible. I have, in the past, expoused the theory that it is WHO You are rather than, WHAT you write, that generates the volumes of crowns for some writers. It does seem to be a wholly inexplicable system, not to say 'inequitble'. That some writers whether new on the site or 'old hands' can hit upon the secret to receive crowns for every two or thre opinions they submite, yet others have to literally 'write their balls off' to get a nomination. I must confess that personally it is HIGHLY FRUSTRATING. But, I promised I'd not moan and groan and frankly, I'm beginning to 'care less'. Indeed, why should I? It is a supposed 'mark of excellence' - let's forget the paltry £1.50 that the crown earns you, the 'crown' conveys to the masses that the opi
nion that has been bestowed with the 'jaggy bunnet' (A Scottish terminology, much loved of the Johnstonian clan), is the tops! Indicating additionally that the writer of said 'bunnetted' opinion is one the reader should cling to, for he/she is a fountain of all knowledge. Thus, I begin my quest for a crown of my own. I am not a superstitious person. I find it terribly difficult trying to type with my fingers crossed - but on this occasion and in my avowed quest for the holy 'crown' of dooyoo, I have popped into Burger King, picked up one of their cardboard crowns and am wearing it at this very moment in the vain attempt that it's wondrous glow will somehow rub off on my pathetic writing. So, that's one tip if you want to get a crown - "Get a crown, Get a head, Get a crown on your head" (although what the hell do I know?) ~Tip number two - as mentioned earlier "Write your balls off". Please note, this certainly does not preclude any females from earning themselves crowns. And there are plenty of them on this site, who have more balls than me when it comes to putting the odd sentence or ten together. ~Tip number three - As mentioned above, many excellent lady, woman, girly type writers of the opposite gender-like sex are past masters (err mistresses) in earning the 'pointy hats'. Thus may I ask for you to share your advice on how it's done in a "Get your Tips out for the boys' opinion or comment? That comment is quite obviously aimed at the comely 'sexy kay', whose 'tips' are always well received..... ....And finally (because I'm beginning to get bored and starting a headache with this silly crown on - plus, I'll be a bit embarrassed if my wife comes up and finds me wearing it!)...I've read serious suggestions about extending the Dooyoo crown system by having categories or a quality of crown. A Bronze crown for a ru
n-of-the-mill brilliant opinion. A Silver crown for a really super-duper one and the zenith - the ultimate, Gold crown for the absolute Grand master of opinions. A very worthy idea, I must say - it would probably give me a sniff of getting the occasional 'rusty' crown. BUT - Hey, hang on there, you might just have the germ of an idea. How about a Top opinion of the month? It could maybe get to say on the front page of Dooyoo for the next month and be held up as a shining example to all others of the 'best of the best' of Dooyoo. Whether Dooyoo's funds can run to awarding this coruscating** opinion some almighty wonga, I doubt - but why not approach a Sponsor? After all it would be rewarding excellence. The 'Booker prize of Dooyoo' could be launched with all monthly winners for the year as nominations and the overall winner getting.....a BMW, Diamond Necklace, Caribbean Holiday or even, who knows - a free Macdonalds Happy meal! Ouch, this damned BK Crown really is 'going to my head' - but maybe I have just given the tiniest food for thought. One thing you can be sure of - this op WON'T Win it! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ **look it up in a dictionary - I once scored a goal that was described thus!
Routine, Run-of-the-mill and Unoriginal - there you are, in a nutshell, my review of Cate Blanchett's latest offering - the Wartime romance 'Charlotte Gray. We've certainly seen a lot of the talented antipodean recently. Here in the UK we saw BANDITS released in November, where she co-starred with Bruce Willis. That was closely followed by LORD OF THE RINGS, in which she played - albeit briefly - Galadriel. Soon to be on our screens is the much vaunted SHIPPING NEWS, where we see Cate playing opposite Kevin Spacey. This current outing, however, sees her take on the role of Charlotte Gray, the eponymous heroine of Sebastian Faulk's romantic novel. But, however fine an actress Ms Blanchett undoubtedly is actress (the nearest thing in the current day to Meryl Streep), she is unable to lift this predictable yarn of wartime romance above the level of 'We've seen it all before'. Charlotte meets handsome RAF Pilot, Peter (Rupert Penry-Jones ) and the two become lovers. His plane goes down on a mission over Nazi occupied France. As a fluent French speaker, Charlotte is recruited as a spy and she hopes that she may be able to find her missing lover. But remember it's wartorn Vichy France and things don't go according to plan. She meets up with a local resistance group and acts as liaison between them and another British spy. She gradually comes to realise that she will not find Peter and grows deeply attracted to Julien Levade, the swarthy communist inclined, local Resistence leader played by Billy Crudup. Ever stolid Michael Gambon - he of the extremely 'lived in' face, plays Julian's father. He's a real pillar of the local community and someone who would really like to just live out the war, Levade Senior hates the Nazis and helps shelter a couple of Jewish children. This part of the storyline is quite poignant and is probably the main redeeming feature of the movie as we see the chil
dren as helpless pawns in an evil game. The action - or what there is of it - is achingly slow. You find yourself thinking "what is the point of all this" and "where is it all leading". It all seemed pretty familiar ground, trodden a hundred times before in so many movies. In fact it would have been a nice touch to have introduced a bit of light relief akin to the cast of 'Allo Allo' turning up at some point. It's directed well enough by Gillian Armstrong, but it's the story that is not strong enough, there is certainly enough talent in the cast as you cannot fault the performances of Blanchett, Crudup and Gambon. I'm afraid that this movie is worthy enough and might be recommened to those of you who get 'horny' reading a Mills and Boon, but honestly it is not the kind of movie that lives long in the memory. I would compare this a little with last year's "Captain Corelli's Mandolin", which I thoroughly enjoyed and is certainly a cut above this film. Both have great scenery and a good looking couple as the movie's focal point, who get romantically entwined during wartime. You will also notice an incredible similarity in the endings of both movies. ? My advice - get Captain Corelli out on DVD and save the entrance fee on Charlotte Gray.
Put your hand up if you are a man and hate shaving. Right then, I made that err 1..2..3..4............ 18,738,962 or thereabouts. So - you hate it, but it has to be done. Do you prefer a WET Shave or are you 'all-electric' nowadays? If you prefer a CLOSE, Wet shave then the chances are you either use Gillette Mach 3 or maybe some cheapo disposal razor - or maybe you use this one, Wilkinson Sword's top of the range FX PERFORMER. Currently being advertised on TV by another famous 'baldie' Andre Agassi (that's him AND Me, but he's possibly more famous and he's a darn sight better Tennis player, I'll give him that!) Andre extols the virtues of Wilkinson's 'diamond coated blades' and that they will give you a cleaner, closer, safer shave. Well, that's as maybe. Myself, personally, I'll stick to Gillette's Mach 3 system. I've tried most of what's on offer in the shaving market. Right from the "Aaaaagh!!" ....to the "Oooooh!". I'm writing this op on the funky looking and pretty new Wilkinson Sword system, because a couple of months back, my son returned from his holiday with this rather nice looking, yellow razor. He'd - for once - forgotten to pinch one of mine to take with him on holiday, so had to buy one at the Airport to last him the fortnight of his holiday. It looked good - and as we know LOOKS are more important than effect (No!) As I said, it does look good. It feels good too (I AM STILL TALKING ABOUT THE RAZOR !!). The rubberised grip and the yellow curved plastic handle certainly help guide the blades through your stubble. The blade cartridge it a 'twin' rather than the Mach 3's Triple blade system. It had a now ubiquitous blue lubricating strip as well as the Wilkinson Sword patented guardwire to enhance your 'safe shave'. It does give you a decent shave, of that there is no doubt. BUT B
earing in mind that pricewise there is little difference between this system, the price of replacement blades and that of the Gillette Mach 3, I can honestly say that the Mach 3 is MUCH Better - Noticeable better! The Razor does come in a nice looking case, with space for half a dozen spare blade cartridges. The blades are easy to change - but aren't they all, these days? What else can I tell you about this shaving system? I could tell you that before you attempt to shave, wet your face and then when shaving, ensure that you move the razor over you face in the direction of your stubble's growth, rather than AGAINST it. Ouch! But, then you know that. If you don't...then maybe you are not old enough to shave - or you are a girl/woman.....maybe both. All I can add is that as a confirmed user of the Gillette System, worthy as the FX Performer razor is, added to the endorsement (bet they paid through the nose!) of Agassi, I would not change over. If you want to try it for yourself and see, keep an eye out for any special offers at Boots or any of the big supermarket chains. Not only do I have to go through the daily grind of shaving my chin, but also my bald head too. Must keep it smooth and kissable, just in case XXXXXX (please feel free to fill in the gap with the name of an appropriate hot babe of your choosing - please, NOT Nora Batty!) pops round for a 'quickie'. Safety is important and the Wilkinson razor does give you that. But for an all round smooth operator, Mach 3 wins hands down.
....OR ANOTHER 'F' IN FRIDAY... What is it about Fridays on Dooyoo? You log on hoping to read something interesting and there is just a succession of SHITE! Yes - YOU and YOU and YOU. You know who I mean. OH WOW ITS REELY COOL AND MY MATE SAID YOU KNOW FINGY, HE SUCKS. I challenge you - Just look down the list of latest Opinions. Apart from one of two exceptions it is UNMITIGATED SHITE!! No beating about the bush. I realise, of course that the moroinic perpetrators of this garbage will not be reading this. In the minute or so that it takes them to read this - they could have written three or four opinions of their own1 'Opinions' - yep, thats a laugh INNIT. Hardly the name for the rubbish that gets doled out in the name of 'opinion' at this time of the week. I asked WHY? But more to the point ... WHY BOTHER? The crap that wastes our time and forces GOOD, WELL CONSTRUCTEED AND WELL WRITTEN stuff out of the latest ops list rather indicates that instead of wasting their time on their PC and WASTING OUR TIME - They should maybe be doing some SKOOL WORK. Or maybe the 11 plus is easier to pass these days. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>. FINAL WORD AND APOLOGY Sorry to waste your time in reading this - BUT IT MAKES ME SO ANGRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!! >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> And just to prove the point that the Rubbish that gets posted destroys the Good stuff - How about taking a look at my Review of 'OCEANS ELEVEN' I wote half an hour ago - it's a damn site more interesting and literate than this garbage.
Put together one of Hollywood's hottest Directors, add some of the planet's hunkiest actors and even throw into the mix , an 'A' List actress and what do you have?... 'OCEANS 11' !! And there's more of course. Set the movie in the entertainment capital of Las Vegas, throw into the mix the plans to pull off a multi million Dollar heist = Sure Fire Success. So far, so good. The plans have worked. Oceans 11 is a remake of the 1960 'Rat Pack' caper movie - directed by Oscar winner Steven Soderbergh. The cast list reads as a Hollywood 'whos who' of heart-throb talent. George Clooney (drool) plays Danny Ocean, just released from the 'joint' and aiming to put together a team to pull off the heist of the Century. Danny's 'partner-in-crime' and sidekick in chief is none other than Brad Pitt (swoon), who plays Rusty Ryan, cardsharp and con artist extraordinaire. They go about selecting their crew of cronies to 'knock over' the vault of the famous Bellagio Hotel and Casino in Vegas. As well as all the Bellagio takings it also houses the money from the MGM Grand and the Mirage - a cool $180million !!!!! There's Matt Damon (faint) as master pickpocket Linus Cauldwell, a couple of crazy brothers - the Molloys - (who provide much of the comic relief), played by Scott Caan and Casey Affleck and cocky cockney explosives expert Basher Tarr. The latter's outrageous accent you'd swear was real (oh yeah?????), but Don Cheadle is most definitely from Kansas! Anyway, next step, find someone to back their audacious plans. They approach millionaire ex-Casino owner Rueben Tishkoff - Elliott Gould playing a real caricature of an archetypal Jewish businessman. Bedecked with jewellery, hideously cool sunglasses - completely Over the Top! He agrees after hearing that they aim to rob the chain of casinos owned by his arch rival Terry Benedict. There
is one more aspect to their plans - Benedict (Andy Garcia) is now shacked up with Danny's ex wife Tess. Danny would love to win her back AND take the money, but Tess is having none of it. Julia Roberts plays Tess in a rather downbeat manner. I just could not get over excited about the prospects of Danny winning her back. The old adage of "there's plenty more fish in the sea" kept coming to mind - especially with his cut of $180m !! Anyway that sets the scene for you. Clooney and Pitt wisecrack their way through the movie, surmounting all problems thrown at them. The gang gels together and puts all the pieces in place to pull off the ambitious heist. The soundtrack is great, really adding to the 'feel' of this movie. It's already been a huge hit Stateside and is starting to take the UK by storm. But do they manage to pull it off? Not telling ! - you?ll have to go see the film. I guarantee you that this will be the coolest film you'll see all year. Although whether Clooney and Pitt - as a duo, can hold a candle to those two greats Redford and Newman, you'll have to make up your own minds.
or SOMETHING FOR THE WEAK END, SIR? or even 'JONNY COME LATELY' There are three main kinds of penetrative sex - lets face it - and condoms are extremely useful in each of them. Whether you are a man or a woman - engaging in oral sex, full intercourse or any kind of 'backdoor' activity - these days Condoms are a must. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ~ WARNING - There may be some very tacky language used in this op. Words such as 'splat', 'goo', 'plop', 'spurt', 'suck', 'blow' and even 'todger' could find their into the text. Phases such as 'Oh yeah Baby' and 'Harder, yes, aaaaaagh' may not be graphically portrayed, but simply inferred. Please, if you find these kind of words offensive.....what the hell are you reading THIS for? ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ OK So there are those of us - married for a gazillion years - who have just the one sexual partner. In this case, condoms need not be used during sexual playtime, but can be used possibly as a change or as an aid to lubricating parts which in advancing age may not be as pliable and amenable to errr....rough treatment as in past years. Obviously the horrors of HIV (or as someone I know called it HGV - does he know something about lorry drivers I don't?) and Aids have brought the 'Safe Sex' use of condoms to the forefront. With not only homosexual intercourse, being linked to these diseases, but straight'sex too, especially of an overly promiscuous nature. The whole notion of safe sex took on a completely new meaning at the end of the 1980s with the spread of these awful plagues. It used to be that a man would wear a condom purely to prevent his lady getting pregnant. If the couple were regular sexual partners and a condom was dispensed with, the worst that would happen would be....a bouncing baby! Or the
absolute worse case scenario would be those taboo sexual diseases - V.D, gonorrhoea, syphilis etc, if you were to 'sleep around'. But the advent of Aids scared the sexually liberated - both straight and gay. It was a killer. Gone therefore are the days when condom was a dirty word....the kind of thing that schoolboys (and indeed grown men) would snigger about and get embarrassed buying at the chemists. It was accepted that if you were 'out on the pull', you would carry one with you - just to be safe - but also one less reason why the apple of your eye would not sleep with you, of course. In fact in the new condom generation, I'm sure there has been more than one moment of embarrassment, when the girl of your dreams rings you up to suggest you 'bring your mates round'. So you dive into your bedroom draw, grab a handul of 'mates' condoms and dash round.........oops! I must confess, the last time I used a condom was somewhere around 1975. I think they were still made of rubber in those days. But for the sake of this opinion only, I convinced my wife of very nearly 25 years, to 'humour me' (funny phrase for oral sex isn't it?) and we set about getting in a supply of the latest...or should I say 'latex' varieties. Now before any of you even think that to 'road test' half a dozen condoms, in the normal course of our sexual life would take well over six months - don't let my bald head and ageing features fool you. I AM A STUD! (...yes dear and you are a horny bitch too - she'd like that put in writing in case any of our neighbours read this). So it was off to the chemists, the men's toilets in a pub and a couple of other places locally that have blacked out windows and sell all manner of 'sexual playthings' shall we say...??!! Not being used to wearing this little things any longer (well not longer - shorter to be truthful), I did not quite
know what to look for - after all the ones with the ribbed bits and the nobby things on the end where not going to give ME the pleasure were they? Size matters, of course - Am I dreaming or did they used to have 'shrink to fit' ones in the old days? Whether your manhood is the size of a wiggly worm, or stands as tall and erect as Big Ben, then there is a size for you. They come is 'tiny todger' size, 'merely a mouthful', which is pretty much medium, right through to 'dustbin liner' for those of you who like to boast that 'extra large' is a bit of a snug fit !!! After doing our market research, we settled on some flavoured condoms - a glow in the dark one (so that Jill could carry on reading her book - under the covers) - a couple of regulars and a Durex one "with uniquely positioned ribs designed for greater lovemaking, coral coloured, lubricated with a non-spermicidal lubricant, teat-ended". So let's get ready to rumble - as it were. First...please, could we try the 'Rhubarb and Custard' flavoured one. With the picture on the pack this looked good enough to eat - and if only I'd been just a bit more flexible....??? But my road tester declared that it was "bloody horrid!'" so there was the first bout of potential excitement rather 'blown' away. The excitement mounted (you see that's my pseudo WWF nickname - 'The Excitement') and it was onward and upward.....??!! The ribbed one was very popular for the lady, I'm pleased to report and after disposing of that one quickly (hey I've got a few to get through, I can't hang around) it was back to a 'taste test'. Maybe strawberry or banana would be more to her liking. Hey, yes, this Strawberry is good. Mmmmmm very tasty - don't know what she thought about it, but it was doing the 'business' for me. Then - damn it - the bloody phone goes!!!! It was my eldest son, ca
n we pick him up in the morning and take him to work? To say that rather ruined the moment...well. "Let's try turning the lights out and get to work on the 'glow in the dark' one". Now this was something different. It worked. A little bit of lip action, some smooth tongue work and we were ready for re-entry. Yes, it definitely looked odd, but it was a rather pleasurable 'odd'. Very Sci-Fi. Ideal for some role playing I'd say. "Ground Control to Major Tom.... la la la.... I'm getting very near....la la la". And another one bites the dust. Well all that has definitely worn me out. Anyway I, sorry , We would recommend the Durex Ribbed, definitely for the female partner's heightened pleasure. They are not expensive (£24.95 for 36 - should be enough for the weekend!) and you could buy from a reputable and long established supplier like Superia Supplies - now online at www.superia-supplies.com. Well that's it from me, I hope you've enjoyed my piece of indulgence. Good Night and Good Sex. ++++++++ NOTE - I have one final option for a title to this Op. "300 UP" - No, it does not indicate an orgy is about to take place - just that this is my 300th opinion posted on Dooyoo....Yippeeeeee!!
I never really understood the appeal of this film until I heard the music and watched the film. Yes, I know that sounds faintly loopy - but you know what I mean. You hear people talking about it. You read things saying how good it is. But you just think to yourself "Well it's not really MY Sort of film". Well, my advice to you, if you feel the same way as I did - forget it. Watch this film and prepare yourself for a real musical extravagaza - a true Classic. No two ways about it, this creation from the occasionally warped mind of Richard O?Brien (yes he of Crystal Maze fame) should be required watching. It's wacky, it's crazy, it's mad, it's fun, it's fruity, it's FANG-TASTIC! This really is a cult movie in the grandest of senses. Tim Curry, of course, completely steals the show in his suspenders and with his vampishly outrangeous performance. Richard O'Brien wrote the brilliant score including the 'cultier than cult' classic 'Time Warp'. I cannot think of many Parties, Disco nights or holidays I've been on where this song has not guaranteed the dancefloor to be packed with timewarpers going absolutely MENNNTTTAAAAAAALLLLLL for it. Sorry, I'll try and calm down a bit. What's it all about then? There is a plot (as if anyone really cares) - based around geek, Brad (Barry Bostwick now seen on TV in 'Spin City' as the Mayor) and his fiancée Janet (Susan Sarandon). They're travelling to meet their science professor when their car gets a flat tyre. They stumble across an old castle, in their hunt to find some help and come across all kinds of weird and wonderful characters. There is Riff-Raff - a handyman supposedly, with a nice line in hunchbacks. The master of the castle is Dr Frank-n-Furter (Curry). He is a transvestite scientist (now having read this far, I think you must be beginning to get the drift, the merest hint ,that th
is film is wacky!!!). Frank happens to be from another planet - the planet Transsexual in the galaxy of Transylvania!. He introduces Brad and Janet to his latest creation - Rocky - who is big and blond! Eddie (played by the one and only Meatloaf) makes a brief appearance about now. He is technically Rocky?s father, Frank having transplanted his brain into Rocky. He's killed by Frank after he escapes from the deep freeze. Lost you yet? Later on in the proceeedings, Frank seduces Brad....and then Janet. She then finds Rocky and seduces him. And theres more - Dr. Scott, their professor turns up there too! I could go on, I really could. If you?ve seen the film - you know what happens, if you haven't - well why not? Amazing, the more I think of it how many people this movie and the songs have reached - not just one generation of students, shall we say, from 20 something years ago - but teens, twenties, thirties and more love it just as much today. It is a GREAT Film. And in an age when that adjective is used far too frequently - this FILM IS GREAT!!! Fantastic glam and vampish costumes. Great, great rocking, singalong music. And a cast full of household names. Now we are all able to enjoy the movie in the glorious DVD Format with all the usual 'add-ons'. As extras to the movie itself, there is also an Audio Commentary by Richard O'Brien and Patricia Quinn (Magenta in the film). A couple of deleted Scenes. Plus plenty of other stuff ideal for fans - 11 Minutes of Outtakes and Alternate Credits Ending. - The Pop-Up Video, made by VHI of 'Hot Patootie'. - A 37 minute long documentary 'Rocky Horror Double Feature Video Show'. - Original cinema Trailers (I can't remember seeing those from the time the film was first released, that it was pretty cool to see these). - A brief Photo Gallery. - Excerpts from and previously unseen outtakes From VH1
's 'Behind the Music' and 'Where Are They Now' (a total of 45 mins). And there's more as well - indeed plenty to get your teeth into and indulge yourself in an evening's worth of Rocky Horror. FAAAAANGGTASSTIC - A real Time Warp. ~~ TIP - Try www.play.com for this DVD, it's current price of £17.99 is the cheapest I've seen it and it includes free delivery to the UK.
Have you dreamed of finding an easy to use idiot-proof camera that will take great pictures every time you use it? Yeah ? Forget it - take it from me, there is no such beast! I don't care how many buttons, program modes, digital this and that's - the most important thing in a camera is the person BEHIND it - i.e YOU! Personally, I have proved that time and again when I have passed my own pro camera and lens over to someone else. Explained how to use it and then - crap pictures! That's just the way of things. Exactly like handing me over a super-dooper-whizzbang video package. I don't have a clue how to use it, therefore the end product will be - I guarantee - rubbish. So far, so gloomy, you are thinking. But, I would certainly commend to you this small, but eminently flexible 35mm zoom compact camera -the Canon z135. Most 'serious' photographers still find the need to have a lightweight, point-and-shoot camera in their pockets for odd moments that happen. When I am not working, I won't be carrying around all my pro gear - two SLR bodies, Several lenses, flashgun etc. So a hobbyist/enthusiast has no need to either. I will usually have my trusty z135 in the car with me, plus it is the only camera I take if I am away on holiday. After all - I am ON HOLIDAY. But, take it from me, it produces excellent results in most circumstances and as long as you use it within it's extremes i.e don't try and take action photos at Old Trafford from the back of the stand! Don't expect the flash to reach the stage when you are at a Rock Concert and seated in Row Z1 and so on. When somebody who has a decent working knowledge of photography is looking for a small compact, the first question to ask is often "Is the quality of the photographs compromised at the expense of convenience and versatility?" Well the z135 has an excellent Canon lens and that speak volumes in itse
lf. Canon have been making professional standard cameras and lenses for many, many years. Their optics are amongst the very best around and the lens is a VERY Important part of any camera. I, for one, would probably look for a specialist camera maker first if I was searching for any kind of photographic package, be it digital, APS or 35mm. An electronics company - like Samsung - who make excellent appliances may have some superiority in the camera's electrics, but the handling and 'photo-taking' side of things, I would humbly contend, should be best trusted to a specialist like Canon, Nikon, Pentax, Olympus and Minolta. Just my own view, but one I'm sure you can see the logic of. So what does the Canon z135 have going for it? It is very smart looking for a start. In these days of sleek silver designs, this camera is not the smallest, but still easy enough to put into a pocket. It is lightweight, yet still retains a feel of 'weight' about it. Rather reassuring you that there is something inside that must be helping you in picture making and taking. >> I can vividly recall my Father-in-law buying a cheap and fairly nasty zoom compact 35mm a few years ago. He wanted to replace the heavier camera and lenses as he just could not lug them about on the rare occasions he got them out. He sold his gear and bought a supposed 'all-singing-all-dancing' Zoom compact. Without my guidance, I might add. When I saw it, it looked fine. When I picked it up it felt 'empty' - as if had no 'guts' inside it. Suffice to say that the camera in question was not a 'prime piece of equipment as results soon proved.<< Back to the matter in hand then. The Canon has a range of features and 'program modes' that make things easy for you. On an input dial at the back of the camera you have 'pictograms' indicating different shooting modes. The ubiquitous 'portrait', 'sports'
;, 'landscape', plus 'auto' and even a manual override. What these modes do is take exposure worries out of your hands. ~~ LANDSCAPE MODE If say you are on holiday and taking a photo of a building, the beach, any kind of scenery, then 'landscape' mode does some of the thinking for you. It sets the camera to take the photo at the optimum depth of field. That is to say, it will stop down the lens to take the distant view as crisply as possible. As opposed to shooting as a fast shutter speed to 'freeze' action. Which takes us onto... ~~ SPORTS MODE This mode will do as mentioned above and calculate the fastest shutter speed for the picture you are taking. In addition to this, the brilliant Canon autofocus system (as recognised as being the fastest by the Pros) will also go into 'servo' mode which means that it will use an active autofocus to track the subject before taking the photo. Rather than in a static group or individual shot it will be in a 'one shot' mode as the subject is still. ~~ PORTRAIT MODE This is a combination of the two above programs. Usually - as the name implies - ideal for close up photos of one individual or a small group shot. In addition, the camera has the pretty standard, but eminently useful functions of automatic film-loading and rewinding. Fast flash recycling time of 4 seconds, which will automatic come on in dark or backlit situations. Thus, the chances of making mistakes are minimized still further. ~~ ZOOM FACILTY As is pretty standard in cameras of this type, the zoom is done by means of a button on top of the camera close to the shutter release button. You can zoom the lens to any position between the widest angle of 35mm and up to its limit of 135mm. Many zoom compact do not allow smooth zooming like this, but only allow say 35mm, 50mm, 80mm and 100mm and they will stop the zoom accordingly. Don't expect that havi
ng a zoom lens will let you get super close to your 'prey'. For example a human eye will normally be regarded as having a 50mm angle of view. So at the widest angle of 35mm, your camera is seeing lightly more than you would see normally and as such, is ideal for group photography, team pictures etc. Similarly the 135mm will actually gets just over twice as close to your subject, so yes, you could stand behind the goal at your local Sunday morning football match and get some passable action pics. Also it means that you could maybe stand a little further away from your young children while they are on the beach and still 'fill the frame' with them without them being as conscious of you being there. Either way, as I said at the outset of this review it is a very flexible camera. One final point. I would suggest you look for this camera in the second hand section of your local photo store. They may still have some new stock lurking around, but as far as I'm aware it was discontinued in 2001. Originally it was £250 plus and you'd be getting a great buy if you could pick up one for around £120 s/h. Remember, this camera - NO Camera - is not foolproof. But I can tell you that I have taken some excellent photos with this and also been able to guide my non-camera-using wife into getting good results too. ~~ FINAL TIPS Just think as you look through the camera's viewfinder (any camera for that matter) am I close enough ? - if not zoom in. Is the subject light enough ? - if not make sure the flash is turned on. Does the picture look how I want it to? If not, maybe move position. Good luck.
As we are all members of that exclusive club known as 'the human race', we appear to be drawn to reading about death and the weird and wacky ways that people find of getting there. The book that I'm reviewing here is the second volume of Wendy Northcutt's DARWIN AWARDS - True stories of how humans have 'met their maker'. It is just as funny as the first and can be highly recommended. The awards commemorate and "salute the improvement of the human genome by honouring those who accidentally kill themselves in really stupid ways" There are ten chapters in this current book and each one targets and highlights similar influences. For example, Men, Water, Animals etc. For a start, I was interested to read about the college student who died when a hand grenade he was juggling - exploded! Or another unfortunate occurrence when a tribesman in Ghana who purchased a potion that was said to make his body impervious to bullets. After he'd smeared the stuff all over his body for 14 straight days, the 23 year old stood in a clearing and asked his chums to shoot at him. Suffice to say, the potion did not live up to all it's claims. Another unlucky chap was in a hurry for a Coke. So he tried to tip over the Drinks machine to get at it - unfortunately it fell on him and crushed him. Ooops! Get the picture so far. This book does rather underline man - and woman's - overall stupidity. The ways and means of plunging headlong into oblivion are crazy and utterly stupid - in the extreme. I mention in passing 'women' - well for those of you interested, one of the 10 chapters in dedicated (if that's the right word) to women. The ways that certain female members of the species have seen fit to shuffle off this mortal coil. Take, for instance, the member of a small religious sect that test their inner strength by standing in the middle of a road in
the midst of traffic. This lady managed her 'appointment with God' rather soon that she'd planned, I think. This is the kind of book that is ideal for just dipping in and out of. It is guaranteed to make to think and certain to make you smile. I'm not sure if it is the kind of book that you would read from cover to cover, but great for picking up and taking with you on a journey. Although, be warned, other passengers may well wonder why you are sitting there with a big smile on your face! Most of the stories - despite some being pretty far-fetched - have been authenticated by the author, or so we are told. Frankly, who cares if they are completely true or not - they are funny. There is in fact a pretty famous piece of fiction which does rear it's hilarious head. Those of you familiar with the works of Hoffnung will recognise his 'The Bricklayer'. Wendy Northcutt does explain that it's inclusion in the Awards - despite it being fiction not fact - saying that it was "Just too funny to exclude". There is also a website which many of you may already be aware of - www.darwinawards.com - where a lot of these stories are culled from. Not all are about ridiculous deaths, but human stupidity in general. A sample is shown below ~~~ FAMILIAR KNICKERS (October 2001, Norway ) " A drunken robber, masked in his own underpants, presented a bank teller with a demand note and absconded with the money. But his gains were short-lived. His wife's name was written on the reverse side of the paper. The 47-year-old man said he didn't remember the robbery, but had a suspicion he'd been up to no good when he saw the picture of the robber in the morning paper. The masked man was wearing a familiar pair of knickers, and our forgetful thief found an unexplained wad of cash in his pocket. " Material increases by the month - after all, people don't stop doing stupi
d things do they? So, as well as the first volume of these stories and this current Volume 2, I'd hazard a guess we should be looking out for a third volume before very much longer (in time for Christams 2002 maybe ?). Anyway it's a great read, very amusing (sad also in a way) and available at present only in a hardback version priced at around a tenner, I'm told (I got mine as a recent Birthday pressie).