An Ode To My Nokia 3510i (Nokia 3510i)

Member Name: stephen_logan

Product:	Nokia 3510i
Date:	13/05/05 (485 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Cheap, Durable, Thief resistent

Disadvantages: Bulky, Not a great fashion statement

My days in the dark ages of mobile technology are drawing to a shuddering halt. Having finally succumbed to the temptation of technological consumption I have finally agreed to an upgrade. So this piece is as much a review as it is a fitting epitaph to a dear old friend. In a world of miniaturization and amalgamation the Nokia 3510 stands as a decaying relic of past ingenuity. A phone built to last not to be pleasing on the eye.

Of the four phones I have disastrously owned over the last 5 years this has lasted longest and survived more. Although now tragically outmoded, it has simplicity and efficiency where others have style and innumerable portable options. It may not support the new fangled wave of electronic gizmo’s, your bluetooths, your java downloads even your ‘real’ ringtones, but dammit it’s got table tennis.

I got this phone a little under two years ago, by which point it was already clearly out of date. But alas whilst others have taunted the rather bulky inadequacies of my phone it has outlasted all of theirs. You see it has a security device that no other phone can buy, that being it is without any value or credibility. You can leave this on a park bench in the middle of London for an hour and no one would dare touch it. Yes the vain amongst you might find this a little disturbing, but is a phones job not simply to make calls?

You see in this post-modern technological age where elements of every appliance must be combined in order to make something ‘new’ we have largely lost sight of items original and most fundamental use. Oddly I got this phone to call people, I bought a camera to take pictures, a CD player to listen to music and a camcorder to video things. This simplistic sentiment appears to be a rather archaic and heavily outdated methodology for purchasing goods in the modern marketplace. I was weak to the temptation of integrated gizmo’s the flashing lights the exciting noises, in essence I fell into the gaping consumer trap that has enveloped this earth. The hegemonic power of the bourgeoisie informs us mere serfs to purchase to extravagance and we dutifully oblige. That is not our fault it is in our new breed of human nature, to survive we must consume, we mast remain credible, and the only way to do this is to buy, buy, buy.

The 3510 was the first phone I possessed to come with a colour screen. In the light of modern technologies this is a little underwhelming but through its inherent inadequacies is an underlying depth and sustainability. Not once has the phone given me any kind of problem. Good battery length, no mechanical malfunctions and software breakdowns, it has been a mark of consistency. It also has all the minor features a technophobe could possibly require. It has simple (T9) texting, polyphonic tunes, organiser gadgets and the all-important Nokia games. It may only have 3 games but they are addictive (well at least initially, I make only sporadic time for them now) Backgammon, Ping Pong and Sky Diver, some crazy stuff but needless to say a lot of fun.

The phone does not have the capability to import or export pictures, other than those simplistic pixelated ones which come as standard with the handset. Personally this has never come as too much of a problem, but if you are photo-texting fiend then this is not the phone for you. So who is this phone for? You are probably so put off by the endless spiel of mine, undermining it is credibility at every juncture that the idea of owning one seems quite preposterous, but wait. Ok if you’re a long time owner of a new phone this handset would seem like a marked step back. However if you need just a simple handset to get started on or just a phone for emergencies this could very well be your saviour. By now it’s price has plunged and it’s credibility fairly well diminished so it’s easy to obtain and easier to keep. Like the old Nokia’s (3310 etc.) the 3510 is painfully easy to use. The phones menu is split up into twelve clearly labelled and numbered sections. Ranging from games to organizer the phone has the complete set of, admittedly simplistic functions that you might require.

Its durability also offers it up as a very good security phone for the elderly or even younger children. This phone is unlikely to run out of juice or breakdown out of the blue, ultimately making it a very safe proposition for a very unsafe world. The buttons are large enough for my podgy fingers, and I see no problem with anyone being able to use them. The screen is fairly large and come with equally giant displays, which can even be read when under the double vision spell of heavy inebriation. In it’s value range I don’t think it can be beaten, it will not make you any friends but for those who like me don’t care about such things it offers the perfect answer to life’s communicatory problems.

Alas my time is through with this decaying piece of technology and it will soon be time to bid it adieu. But lest ye forget how well this brick has served me, yes it is culturally unacceptable but so is my fashion taste so we are two of a kind. It is a dinosaur of the mobile communications age but yet it still stands up as a very useful piece of technology. Mock me if you wish but I love my 3510, and will undoubtedly miss it when it is sent to the great mobile gig in the sky.



RESPONSE
In light of the questions raised by sirg0508 I have added this little extra segement, not that many will notice or care about it's contents I just thought I'd have a mention. The phone does have a wap capability I never got i connected so i cannot vouch for it's quality or how much it can do but i would assume that it is fairly good, but as a wise man said never assume it makes an ass out of u and me. Similarly the memory is questionable i know for a fact that it has the capabilityt to store around 100, but like all fools i chose to save them to my sim card so this may be variable. I hope this information has been useful to you.

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