A COLD TURKEY OF A MOVIE (Rollerball (DVD))

Member Name: snappy

Product:	Rollerball (DVD)
Date:	01/08/02 (261 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Rebecca Rominj-Stamos - gorgeous in anything, better in NOTHING

Disadvantages: The cast, the plot, the film.

The original Rollerball movie became one of THE True ?cult? films of the 70s. However, this quite woeful re-make will most definitely be regarded as one of this decade?s real TURKEY!

Well, for a start, who on earth thought that leading man, Chris Klein, could carry the star role in this Sci-fi wannabe-blockbuster? Lightweight, but nice enough dumb hunk 'Oz' from the 'American Pie' movies, Klein will be hard pressed to get a lead role again after his uncharismatic portrayal of Johnathan Cross in this one. Some would say his acting is 'wooden' - well I reckon if you searched him you?d find the mark of Chippendale on his ass. Possibly his next 'acting' gig???

Anyway, what was a well regarded and memorable original starring James Caan, about a futuristic game on roller skates, is now turned into a cross between WWF and 'Starlight Express' by Director John McTiernan. From it?s US Opening last year, it has been universally panned by critics. They are not always right, but most definitely called it correctly with this dross.

For those of you remotely interested in seeing this movie sometime(and take my advice ? don't), the basic plot sees us in 2005 and Cross (Klein) recruited by Alexi Petrovich (Jean Reno) to star in his new venture - an extreme sport played out on roller blades. There are few rules - cancel that....there are NO Rules. Audiences are after blood and violence and they get that aplenty. Bribing goes on to get teams to go 'over the top', to help viewing figures.

When the original movie came out, the Rollerball game was obviously based on the then popular US sport of 'Roller Derby' , with many overtones from the oft violent sport of 'Ice Hockey'. That was a well observed, acted and original piece of cinema. This remake tries (I think it tries anyway) to update and add to that legacy - but fails dismally. The sets are tacky, the costumes, frankly, plain awful
and the whole thing is just very poorly 'thrown together'. Sad too - bearing in mind the director was responsible for some decent work in Die Hard, Predator and Thomas Crown Affair.

And for fans of rapper LL Cool J and sexy Rebecca Rominj-Stamos, they are both in this movie too. But, Please don?t use that as an excuse to go to see this - this will not be a movie they will be highlighting on their Showreels.

There have been several movies released in the UK this year already, that have had a very short stay at Cinemas. Personally, I?m glad I did not have to pay to watch this and I can fully see why we?ve had to wait 9 months since the US release of this, to get it here. They were trying to sneak it in before anyone noticed.

Apologies to anyone expecting an epic review of this movie. Sorry - it really is just not worth it. Don?t bother, Stay away, Save your money and go see something like Minority Report or Resident Evil instead.

NOTE ? Possibly so bad that it will - in the future (around 2005) be regarded as a 'cult' movie.

Summary: