Death by reptiles in a metal tube... (Snakes on a Plane (DVD))

Member Name: blissman70

Product:	Snakes on a Plane (DVD)
Date:	18/01/09 (77 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: a good start and a few funny moments

Disadvantages: Everything after the good start...

Director: David R. Ellis
Producers: Craig Berenson, Stokely Chaffin, ,Penny Finkelman Cox, Jeff Katz, Don Granger, Justis Greene, David J. Taylor, Gary Levinsohn, Sandra Rabins, George Waud and Toby Emmerich
Writers: John Heffernan David Dalessandro and Sebastian Gutierrez
Stars: Samuel L. Jackson, Julianna Margulies, Terry Chen, Nathan Phillips, Rachel Blanchard, Todd Louiso, Kenan Thompson and Bobby Cannavale.


This 1 hour and 45 minute action/thriller was released in 2006 and involves, as the title suggests, a plane and a load of reptiles...


**BRIEF PLOT**

When gangster Eddie Kim, (played by Bryon Lawson) and his gang murder a prosecutor the only witness is Sean Jones, (played by Nathan Phillips).
Sean is then placed into the protection of FBI agents Neville Flyne, (played by Samuel L. Jackson) and John Sanders, (played by Mark Houghton) who have to protect him during the flight to Los Angeles so he can testify against Kim.
Only there seems to be a little bit of a problem onboard the plane, as they head for their destination.


* IN CONCLUSION...

I had been meaning to watch this for some time, as I tend to like Samuel L. Jackson as I find him to be able to portray a character brilliantly well... like his role as Zeus in Die hard with a vengeance, Elmo in the 51st State, Ordell in Jackie Brown and Jules in Pulp Fiction... and, naturally I thought that this interestingly titled movie would be one of his best ever...so when this came on the television on Saturday night I thought, "finally, a decent movie for a Saturday night instead of all that dancing in a freezer whilst showing off Britain's got no talent reality stuff that is pumping over the airwaves nowadays.."... but unfortunately I was a little wrong about this movie and a little disappointed that Jackson actually agreed to star in it at all...

Don't get me wrong, it wasn't the worst movie that I have ever seen... I mean, years ago I remember once sitting through a movie called 'absurd' and believe me, that was a bad movie indeed, if it wasn't for the gruesomeness of it I would have turned the damned thing off for the shear stupidity of it...

Anyway... back to this rather falsely advertising titled movie...
When I sat down to watch it I was pleasantly pleased as it began with a bit of action of sorts... well a bloke hanging from a tree about to have a rather heated argument with a man and his baseball bat... I rubbed my hands in anticipation, looking forward to the next hour and forty minutes of action... but how wrong can a man be...
Once the man in the tree finished his little chat with his oriental friend and someone took a few shots at the witness the only other action for quite some time was when the stewardess threw a tantrum when her passenger list went up the wall due to the FBI commandeering the first class...although there were a few half decent comical moments involving a fictional rap artist who has an aversion to dirty things, a dog in a handbag who takes a liking to the rap man and a rather camp sounding air steward who actually surprises everyone at the end..?

But as for the alleged action I was waiting for, well, I had to wait another hour and a bit before I began to get back into the movie... it was basically seventy odd minutes of pure padding, consisting of some dodgy rubber looking snakes, who seemed to see everything in an illumines green colour, being released from a massive crate, surrounded by what looked like pizza boxes... giving way to the idea of titling the movie as they did...
So with the snakes slithering around the giant tube, hissing at everything in there way and attacking any thing that moves, including a couple who are auditioning for the mile high club and a rather unsuspecting man who is innocently taking a wee, until one of the little blighters grabs his little blighter... probably thinking it was mating season or something, (although that particular shot did make my eyes water a little)... the movie plods on with the pace of a drunken snail dancing on ice...

As the death rate rises, (a little like my boredom levels), with the snakes being hyped up on pheromones or something, taking a liking to everything form a plump ladies eyeballs to the wanna-be WAGS dog in a bag...(sounds as delicious as scampi in a basket doesn't it), the so called action tries to show it head...but sadly fails until the last quarter of an hour... although the action from then on is more comical and a little to unrealistic, totally spoiling what could have been a cracking little movie.


In all...although the idea of snakes on a plane is technically a sound one it is a shame that it was written with so little enthusiasm..
The first ten to fifteen minutes are quite good and the last fifteen minutes are quite good as well.. but the hour and fifteen minutes in between should never have been allowed to be filmed... with the ending being about as realistic as Manchester City winning the Premiership this season... talk about writers running out of ideas for a genuinely good finale.
The all round acting was almost like something you'd see on a cheap 'B' movie and my opinion of Jackson has dipped slightly, although I do realise that he, and the rest, did the best they could with the rather crappy script they were given...

This movie could have been better if it was only half hour long and written with a little bit of something more than boredom...

It is one of them movies which I for one will not rush out to rent it...or even point the remote at the television if I see it advertised... but if you do want to repeatedly watch it, (each to his/her own I suppose) then www.play.com do a copy for less than a fiver.

Summary: The writers should have been killed on the plane as well...???