Big Pants and Thong Save The Day (The Blade Master (DVD))

Member Name: The Polar One

Product:	The Blade Master (DVD)
Date:	20/04/07 (629 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Miles O'Keefe for the ladies, Lisa Foster for the lads

Disadvantages: Hammy, weak and silly plot, bad continuity

96. The Blade Master - aka: Ator the Invincible (1984) *film only review

Writer/director Joe D’Amato is notorious for directing a multitude of gore, hard and softcore sex films, and various combinations of all three with lashings of sleaze thrown on top. He has worked on more films than many have watched, and gone by more pseudonyms than you could probably name members of your own family. Joe D’Amato being one of them; his birth name was Aristide Massaccesi. As his real name suggests, his films are Italian productions, but often working in English, with English speaking actors.

Ator the Invincible – also known as Ator 2, Ator L’invincible 2, Ator: The Blade Master, Cave Dwellers, The Blade Master, The Return… where was I? … oh yes. Ator the Invincible is the sequel to Ator; The Fighting Eagle – also known as Ator, Ator: L'aquila Battante, and of course Ator the Invincible. Oh dear.

The Ator films are a departure from D’Amato’s usual material, being more family friendly fantasy adventure films. Most likely made to cash in on the Conan films of 1982 and 1984 – the exact same years that the first two Ator films were released. I’m guessing they don’t make all that much cash anymore. On February 1st 2007 Ator the Invincible received an average score of 2.6 out of 10, from 1,336 votes, placing it at No.96 on the IMDB’s bottom 100 films.

The film starts with a quick, and unnecessary, recap of the events of the previous film. I’m not sure if it’s there to pad out the running time or show that Ator is really tough. Either way, he fights off some zombies, a shadow monster, and a giant spider God. So it gives you a flavour of what’s to come. The story revolves around an object of infinite power – the geometric nucleus. No more explanation is given, but an evil and powerful man named Zovv attacks the castle where the nucleus is kept. A wise man named Akronas has hidden the nucleus somewhere in the castle and Zovv must be stopped from finding it or he could… do something bad.

Akronas has also sent his daughter Mila out to find Ator and ask for his help to stop Zovv. Telling her to ride to “what seems like the end of the earth”, she actually just takes a quick jog through a field and some woodlands where she finds Ator in a cave. Strangely the journey back will take them a couple of days; just one of many plot holes and continuity errors. Ator joins her with his curiously named Japanese warrior friend ‘Thong’. Their epic journey begins.

Perhaps I’ve watched too many ‘bad’ films, but despite being very lazily made from start to finish, it’s actually quite amusing. Ator spends most of his time striding around in big pants and furry boots, proudly showing off his nipples and thwarting things. Whilst occasionally proving his exceptional scientific knowledge. And it’s surprising just how much he can fit into those pants, as throughout the film he almost magically produces numerous homemade bombs, and at one point a hang-glider out of nowhere! The standard of foes is similar to the previous film, including invisible monsters (a sure sign of the budget) and a big rubber snake.

There seems to be some confusion about when this film is set. We have a narration that talks of the fires of creation and man’s growing ascendancy - heavily implying prehistoric times through the clothing. Next we have well groomed men of science and language, along with medieval castles, gunpowder bombs, and mass-produced handrails on castle staircases. Not to mention the feudal samurai warriors, and the hang-glider. It’s all rather confusing.

The plot never goes anywhere logical. Despite knowing Ator is on his way, Zovv spends most of his time exchanging polite insults with Akronas and stroking his fake moustache. Despite knowing the fate of the world rests on attaining the geometric nucleus before Zovv, Ator decides to take a long excursion to sort out some petty disagreements between impoverished villagers. I would say things come to a predictable conclusion but the film is so loosely put together you can never be quite sure what will turn up next.

Acting wise there is very little talent on show. Lisa Foster is probably the most consistent and convincing of a bad lot as the smart, tough and sexy Mila. Miles O’Keefe, of Tarzan fame, gives an acceptable performance as the archetypal do-gooder muscle man Ator. Although his part calls for little more than killing things followed by a couple of moral speeches. Chen Wong (Thong) is lucky that he is not required to speak. It makes him appear a better actor by virtue of not being given the chance to make a fool of himself. Everyone else is atrocious.

It was a laugh, but it was also a great big mess, hammed up to the max. Whilst the direction is barely competent, pretty much everything else fails. They couldn’t even get the final narration right as a couple of words were accidentally edited out, rendering the sentence nonsensical. It’s quite astounding that this was followed by two further sequels. I wouldn’t recommend Ator the Invincible to anyone as serious entertainment. Conan fans might be able to derive some cheap laughs from it.


Rated: PG
Running Time: 92mins

Sequels:
Iron Warrior (1987) - starring Miles O’Keefe, but not directed by D’Amato.
Quest for the Mighty Sword (1990) - no Miles O’Keefe but D’Amato returns to direct it.

Summary: It has a character named Thong in it.