Newest Review: ... with each other, though they love each other deeply. There are a few good scenes with Bella and her new friends - Jessica (Anna... more
I'm Team "Wish the car had hit Bella"
Twilight  (DVD)
Member Name: Dentolux
Twilight  (DVD)
Advantages: Not as dull as some critics claim it to be, seems to be popular with the ladies.
Disadvantages: Wooden acting from Pattinson, terrible dialogue, female lead character isn't likeable.
We start off proceedings following Bella Swan whose mother has recently remarried. Now that mom is travelling all over the country, as her new hubbie is a minor league baseball player, it is decided that Bella should move in with her father who is the sheriff of a small town named Forks. Poor Bella now has to readjust from living in sunny Arizona to staying at the Washington coast which is famous for having the country's highest level of annual precipitation. Maybe she would have been better off ditching Forks and going over to Spoons which I hear has much nicer weather. Anyway, at her new high school Bella meets the equally pasty Edward Cullen who initially gives her the cold shoulder when the pair are forced to sit together in a science class.
The two do however gradually begin to get closer, presumably because Bella has a thing for scrawny pretty boys who use way too much hair gel. Her interest in him peaks when Edward saves her from being crushed by a runaway vehicle. The daring last second rescue, which involved a burst of superhuman speed and a display of phenomenal strength that halts a truck with the use of one arm, suggests that Edward isn't your typical teenager. Unless you have been living under a rock for the past seven years you'll know that Ed's extraordinary abilities do not point to him being born on Krypton. Edward and his family are all vampires, although not the ones you associate with Dracula. The bloodsuckers from Twilight are impervious to sunlight. Rather than causing them to spontaneously combust, ultra violet rays make Twilight vampires sparkle almost as if their skin had been coated in glitter.
Forks' residents needn't worry about being mauled by nosferatu because the Cullen clan consider themselves to be vegetarians. Rather than feed off human plasma they restrict themselves to feasting on the red stuff that seeps out of animals. Great news for us homo sapiens, although little comfort for the furry critters that reside in the forest surrounding Forks. Anyway, as time goes by a budding romance between Bella and Edward begins to bloom. Everything seems to be going peachy until another vampire group passes through town. One of the new brood takes an interest in Bella, much like how I take an interest in Mars bars that cross my field of vision. Will Edward be able to protect his love from the Lost Boys reject who wishes to snack on her? Only time will tell.
Out of the two leads I would have to say that Kristen Stewart (Bella) comes across as being the most competent in terms of acting. Unfortunately for the young actress her character is lumbered with terrible dialogue which is awfully difficult to deliver. I have to say that I didn't like Bella at all and find myself perplexed as to why Edward would be attracted to her, aside from her looks. Settling down in a new school is never easy, and even though Bella is fortunate enough to be greeted by friendly kids who offer her friendship, she always seems to want to keep them at an arm's length. When I, the unsociable hermit who stays indoors all day, feels like a movie character should make more of an effort to integrate with others, you know the character in question is too much of a recluse. There's nothing wrong with that I suppose, but it makes it hard for the viewer to relate to her which isn't a good sign for a protagonist.
In terms of performances the weak link of the piece would have to be Robert Pattinson (Edward.) His portrayal of the character left a lot to be desired to say the least. His deadpan delivery of lines made it hard to believe that he felt anything for Bella which really sabotaged the love story in my eyes. Pattinson's mechanical acting skills lacked any emotion aside from a few silly faces whenever Edward becomes agitated. I could accept this if the vampires in the Twilight universe were soulless freaks who have trouble displaying what the feel, but this isn't the case. The rest of the Cullen family all come across as regular people with distinct personalities which their respective actors have no problem in conveying. Edward keeps telling us that a relationship between a human and a vampire is a bad idea, but the actor playing the part seems to be incapable of showing his inner turmoil. All the scenes were Edward wrestles between his love for Bella and the fear that he may harm her due to his bloodlust unfortunately fall flat.
I'm giving Twilight two sparkly stars out of five. My expectations, after hearing so many critics pan it, were that Twilight would turn out to be one of the worst films of all time. After watching it I would however have to say that it is nowhere near as bad as some people claim it to be. Yes I didn't enjoy it, but then again I am not its target audience. I'm not into mushy films and the series is well known for repelling anyone with a penis. That said, a quality film should be able to appeal to as broad an audience as possible. Just think of all those animated movies that kids love, but due to some clever script writing and competent acting end up being enjoyable for adults as well. Some more action would have helped keep any poor boyfriends being forced to watch this awake. Alas the little combat we get to see is restricted to the finale.
Speaking of action, I feel they could have splashed out a bit more cash on the special effects given what a guaranteed money maker these films are. Visually the fights didn't surpass what you would see on a television show such as Smallville or Buffy. The romance wasn't much better either feeling rather forced. It didn't develop naturally, be it due to the poor acting or because they had to cut content from the book to squeeze the story into a two hour feature. Then again maybe the source material is to blame as the cringe worthy romance seemed to be poorly written, rivalling George Lucas' laughable Anakin/Padme dating scenes from the Clone Wars. Meyer after all isn't touted as being the finest author to ever grace literature. Some say that she is a cheap Anne Rice knock off and ironically enough when watching Twilight I couldn't help but feel that I would rather watch Interview with the Vampire instead.
Summary: A vampire romance which only women seem to like.