| Product: |
Beyond The Valley Of The Murderdolls |
| Date: |
11/08/03 (168 review reads) |
| Rating: |
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Advantages: F*ck. :)
Disadvantages: None-believers
Their riffs are always similar, they have the same sounding solos in every song, each chorus is repeating the name of the title, (and maybe adding another sentence that has the F word in), they’re Drag Queens, and they don’t give a f*ck. That isn’t the best of it though, the best bit is that they were allowed to make an album of 15 songs (5 extras on the new something or other version I got), and each of these songs carries the “don’t give a f*ck” theme perfectly!
Of course if I was a REAL music critic I would’ve told you how they’re a bog-standard metal-meets-punk band who use swear words to appeal to children, and I would’ve told you that they’re nothing special, because they’re just fake, but no, I’m lazy and I’m writing about how I enjoy the music, and as a person who can relate to the whole thing, I can also whole-heartedly say, Wednesday 13 (singer), Joey Jordison (rythym guitar), Acey Slade (lead guitar), Eric Griffin (bass) and Ben Graves (drummer) do not give a f*ck about anything that everyone else does, and for that, they have the utmost freedom in their lyrical approach and they have nothing to worry about as far as popularity goes, as everyone digs the idea.
This whole not caring philosophy is a genius way to go about your job, as any reviews just labeling them as “stupid and pointless” are laughed it and agreed with. Their music isn’t an expression of personal feelings or their emotions laid down on paper, it’s hugely fantasy, writing about killing Miss America, f*cking their girls’ mothers and dressing their dads in drag, as well as Grave-robbing and other things which you just can’t help but laugh at and enjoy.
I’ve already told you all I need to know about this album, it has one theme and it goes through every song, so it’s not like there are tons of barely-understandable lyrics to dissect and
rip apart, although we can look at some. The chorus to People Hate Me: “People hate me, because I’m better than you, people hate me, and that’s the motherf*cking truth, people hate me, and you can all f*ck off, I’m perfect, pissed off, beautiful, I’m god” As you can see, they’re cocky, they don’t like other people very much and they know they piss other people off just as well. The outro to Let’s F*ck: “Let’s f*ck you f*cking wh*re, let’s f*ck you f*cking wh*re, let’s f*ck and f*ck and f*ck and f*ck and f*ck and f*ck some more!” Furthermore, they obviously enjoy f*cking, and enjoy saying the word f*ck (“I Love To Say F*ck). They appear to be sickenly sexist, but only to you stup
id people, because it’s fantasy, and it’s a joke, of course. The first verse of I Love To Say F*ck: “And I ain’t got a fucking problem, I just love to say f*ck, and I don’t care who’s around me, I couldn’t really give a f*ck, and I don’t care if you’re my mother, or my motherf*cking father, I couldn’t really give a f*ck now, that ain’t my f*cking problem!” See a pattern? If that type of music doesn’t appeal to you then, a) I don’t understand you, b) you’re not going to like The Murderdolls, and c) sorry for all the swearing. ;)
Okay, now’s your time to say “you idiot, how could you possibly like silly, repetitive swearing, in every song?” And my answer to that is please just listen, and don’t feel guilty for not caring about stuff. Now this opinion is random pieces of information, but trust me all that you need to know about the album is here!
And anyone who tells me “this isn’t my thing” … shut up, and enjoy the whole stupidity of it all, and don’t be snobby.
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