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Eoghan Quigg - Eoghan Quigg

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Genre: Pop / Music Album / Artist: Eoghan Quigg / Audio CD released 2009-04-06 at Sony Music

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      19.10.2011 17:07
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      Not good.

      This album contains so much fail that I am at a loss for words, but let's get straight on to the first part of utter failure of this album. Eoghan Quigg used all the dirty tricks in the book to get into the X Factor live shows in 2008 in hope to win the shows and tour the world. These tricks included:
      * Using his Irish roots to win over Louie Walsh. Louie claims to be a tough critic, but just tell him you're Irish and you've already won his heart.
      * Acting cute. His baby face image melted away post X-Factor. Just look at the album cover to prove it. Tried to cause a stir with Britain's Got Talent Winner George Samspon which caused wasted bandwidth.
      * Arse kissing - Dating Diana Vickers which was publicised as a puppy love and they broke up after the show.

      Thankfully these plans to take over the world of music were put to a stop thanks to a boyband named JLS and a female singer named Alexandra Burke. Which is just as well because it's stopped terrible albums like this one being exposed to the world and banished from memory.

      Simon Cowell almost signed him to Syco Records because he initially thought he would get a nice pay cheque out of him, but grew wise and pulled out. So RCA had to put up with him. I've never liked Eoghan Quigg's vocals. I find them too plain and unoriginal and every time I hear him sing I feel lifeless and depressed. No offence, it's the same reason I dislike Justin Beiber's music.

      Moving onto part two of the utter failure of the album. RCA and Eoghan decided, "We're too lazy to create new songs so let's make an album of crappy covers that girls will go crazy for and we will get a quick cash in! We can write our own stuff later."

      When the album was released in 2009, it did gather interest but quickly vanished into thin air. Despite being number 1 in Ireland and 14 in the UK, Eoghan was considered a flop, so he was given the chop. This left his plans to take over the music world in ruins.

      At the time of it's release, it was hands down the worst album of mankind, until Heidi Montag came along. I've never listened an album that is as cheap as this one. They couldn't even be bothered to give him a sparkling album cover.

      To be honest, Eoghan isn't a terrible vocalist. He can sing but he was just average. The vocals are the least of my problems. This album is just cheap, tacky and lazy. Anyone can make a better cover for the album than the cover it has. The music is rushed, dull and empty. I've heard karaoke discs with more atmosphere than this piece of shit.

      The first track of the album is the pop rock 28,000 friends. It's the least known song on the album and it was written by James Bourne around 2007 who is best known for his work in Busted and Son Of Dork. Very modern and relevant as it's about social networking. Instead of doing justice to the song, Eoghan sucks the life out of it which makes the track sound generic and unworthy.

      Then the album takes an unusual turn of the worst when he covers We're All In This Together from... High School Musical. I hate High School Musical, but this cover makes the trilogy sounds like heaven. The track bugs me a lot because there's no originality.

      ABBA's Does Your Mother Know is completely out of place on this album. He's about 16 or 17 at the time this was recorded and he's singing songs outside his age range. This cover gives me horrible thoughts about flirting with minors and toddlers so let's move on.

      The bland cover of Busted's Year 3000 is a raping to my childhood. It's almost as worse as the Jonas Brother's version. The musical arrangements are decent but they are running on flat tyres. Just look at this track list, it's a recipe for disaster.

      1. 28,000 Friends (James Bourne cover)
      2. We're All in This Together (High School Musical cover)
      3. All About You (McFly cover)
      4. Learn to Fly (A1 cover)
      5. Does Your Mother Know (ABBA cover)
      6. Home (Michael Bublé cover)
      7. When You Look Me in the Eyes (Jonas Brothers cover)
      8. Year 3000 (Busted cover)
      9. She's the One (Robbie Williams cover)
      10. Ben (Michael Jackson cover)
      11. Never Forget (Take That cover)
      12. Imagine (John Lennon cover) (Itunes Bonus Track)

      JOHN LENNON IS ONE OF THE GREATEST SONG WRITERS OF ALL TIME. JONAS BROTHERS ARE ONE OF THE WORST BANDS OF ALL TIME. YOU DO NOT PUT A JOHN LENNON SONG AND A JONAS BROTHERS SONG ON THE SAME ALBUM. YOU JUST DON'T! THIS ALBUM DOES NOT COMPUTE BECAUSE IT IS A DISGRACE TO BRITISH MUSIC.

      I'm sorry about that paragraph of rage, but I find the track-list disgusting and the covers disrespectful. You'd be glad to know that there is no obvious use of autotune on the album but he sounds completely out of breath and bored. Only a couple of the songs suit his voice, but even that doesn't make the album sound better.

      Now you all want to know why I downloaded it in the first place. Because I wanted to know if it was really as bad as Popjustice said it would be, and he was right. In a nutshell they take 9 great songs and 3 terrible songs from established artists randomly and turn it to the most revolting pop album of the decade. Do not buy this album, even if you're paid to listen to it and even if you loved him on X Factor. I do not want people going through the same torture. Listening to this album was a traumatic experience and I'm too scared to give it a second go.

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