And you thought the first album review was nasty (Under My Skin - Avril Lavigne)

Member Name: wicked_witch

Product:	Under My Skin - Avril Lavigne
Date:	18/08/04 (1765 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Forgotten

Disadvantages: Avril hasn't been forgotten yet

Hey all, sorry I haven?t been around, I?ve been a busy bunny, but I thought I?d come back. And what better topic to start back with than my favourite person, LaWhinger? *Grins evilly*.

I?m actually surprised she?s lasted to the second album point. I?m almost prepared to eat my hat in fact, but it?s really cool so I don?t think I?ll bother. After the whole ?Avril is not punk backlash?, she started insisting she had never called herself punk, which is, as we all know, a blatant lie. She has now proved herself to be either A- a massive hypocrite or B- totally under the thumb of her manager. Possibly both. This has made me respect the girl even less, she?s gone back on her word after she realised nobody would ever believe she is actually punk. People can?t understand why I dislike her so much. Perhaps some of the following quotes might clear it up?

?I get all these loser preps coming up and asking for autographs and all this crap, and I really want to tell them, ?my music is not for people like you??. Hmm, what a nice lass.

"I'd wear baggy size-32 pants and hoodies. I was a little badass." This one made me spit my Irn Bru all over my monitor. Oh the hilarity.

"I created punk for this day and age. Do you see Britney walking around wearing ties and singing punk? Hell no. That's what I do. I'm like a Sid Vicious for a new generation. People look up to me and want to be me. And that's fine, just don't try to copy the sh** I do!" Where do I start?

There?s no point in pretending I don?t have a completely biased opinion of the girl. Had she come onto the scene, admitted what she was and released her trite, crappy pop songs I wouldn?t have minded so, but I take great objection to rubbishy artists labelling themselves punk, a la Good Charlotte, Busted, Blink182. Also, I found the fact that she insulted everyone who was more famous than he
r ridiculous. I despise Britney as much as I despise Avril, but for Avril to go around and say she could be better than Britney is laughable. For her to say she wished Christina Aguilera was dead and all the rest of it shows a right little madam who needs taken down a peg or two, and its my dearest ambition to backhand her across that pretty little face, sorry to sound harsh. Unfortunately I cant (unless the goddess answers my prayers), so I?ll settle for a scathing and completely biased review. I?m feeling particularly vindictive ever since I hear her cover of ?Knockin? on Heavens Door?, so I?m going to ditch the pretence and deliver as nasty and bitchy a review as I possibly can.

Avrils second album is just more of the first?there?s little innovation or expansion here. She cements her wannabe Alanis sound with this. The songs are a tad darker and more mature, but we?re talking about moving from kindergarten writing to primary three writing, the change isn?t much to talk about. Interestingly the Matrix production team took this on, the same production team writing for Avrils arch-nemesis (she wishes), Britney Spears. It?s an interesting and ironic fact. Instead of pinching from nu-metal and nineties punk, this album has been beaten with the eighties stick quite severely. There?s a few real cheese rock riffs on here, as well as some very eighties power ballads. The slower songs on the album tend to be grandly over-produced ballads by numbers, about as interesting as Kraft macaroni cheese. Apart from this the other type of song is the ?Sk8er Boi? wannabe punk you?re used to from the last album, ?He wasn?t? is ?Sk8er Boi 2?. Yawn. Interesting that, despite two very fine songwriters working with her (once again quashing her claims she writes her own stuff), this is pretty mediocre and best, and dire at worst. Avril is a beautiful girl, and she has a spectacular voice, but if you ask me that?s all she has going for her. I?ve seen wet mops with more talent and
personality.

?Take me away?

- Opens with a melancholic guitar with fluffy poppy synth noises in the background. It descends into a medium paced angry-grrl-been-dumped type song. It has a slightly Evanescence sound to it, it has the eerie minor key sound in the choruses, and Avril singing in a low-pitched voice. Generally its bog-standard angsty teen stuff with a nu-metal edge to it. It?s obvious what this song is trying to do, prove that Avril has grown and her music is now ?dark? and meaningful. It fails abysmally, sounding a little like your baby sister singing along to System of a Down. The guitar playing is clunky, unimaginative heavy riffs, and Avrils voice sounds a bit strange and altered. In fact, her vocals in the choruses are way too high pitched a bit on the irritating side. Avril, irritating? Never. The vocals are typical Avril angsty teen notice that would fit well on an episode of Dawson?s Creek. Particularly telling is the line ?If I show you, I don't think you'd understand, Cause no one understands?. Could she be any more anguished teen? Avril your nearing twenty. Get over it.

?Together?

- This song is completely vile. It?s the sort of rubbishy B-side quality track you would find on a Mandy Moore album, with the added edge of Avrils ?alternative voice?, and heavy choruses that don?t fit the ballad pop song verses. It opens with a sickeningly twee piano tune and echoey voices from Larvae. The loud choruses have a ?call and answer? effect. Her voice isn?t on its usual lovely form, its quite irritating and forced, and there sounds like there?s a good deal of effects added to it. This will be one of the song the lyrics will call alternative and deep, but the lyrics are unimaginative to say the least??Something just isn?t right, I can feel it inside at all?, is not only a double negative, it?s a total cliché. The chorus- ?Together, it doesn?t feel right at all, together, together we built a wall, together, holdi
n hands we?ll fall, hands we?ll fall? sounds like a rhyming dictionary was used, and a pretty poor one at that.

?Don?t tell me?

- The big single from the second album, and nearly as irritating as ?Sk8er Boi?. You may have heard this one. It?s a boring ballad format with the added effect of big chorus. Its one of the ballads-by-number I was talking about. Someone seems to think by adding a heavy electric guitar and lots of noise in the chorus, it will add an individual sound, it just sounds like eighties cheese rock. Based on a strummy acoustic guitar, it sounds like Avril trying to sound like Alanis, just for a change. Avril?s voice in the verses is forced petulant and extremely irritating, while the choruses have her usual riot grrl sound, of course, with added cheese-rock electric guitars for ?effect?. You can hear in this one how Avrils voice has matured a little; to be honest I prefer her vocals on the last album. The lyrics are bog standard Avril, lots of references to her being a woman of virtue, and of course being ?a little badass?. ?Guys are so hard to trust?, in particular, is typical Avril. There?s also quite a hint of bitchiness in there ?Not like that girl the one who, Gives it all away, yeah?, this is the sort of thing that makes me dislike Avril intensely, her anger at not being accepted (you know, as a pxnk rawka) and then bitching about other people. If she does write any of the lyrics I?m willing to bet she wrote that one. I have to say my favourite line in this song is ?I'll have to kick your ass, and make you never forget? its just hilarious. Like that skinny little runt could kick anything?s ass.

?He Wasn?t?

- Oh Dear god. Its Britney meets Greenday. This is going to be the anthem of the album I bet, ?Sk8er Boi? two. It has a heavier sound to it, some of the riffs actually sound very Greenday-esque, in fact so much so I think the riff has been pinched from one of their songs, although I cant think which
one (used to be a fan but have gone off them a bit!) and Lavril abandons her usual over-the-top she-diva voice for a monotone punk drone. I can just see a legion of twelve year olds in armbands bouncing around their rooms *pukes*. Your talking one-chord wonder here, so I?m guessing this is the one song in which Lavvy plays the guitar. The song, naturally, is a about a boy (or boi as may be more accurate), who isn?t, surprise surprise, good enough for our little pxnk princess. The most intriguing lyric in the song is ?uh huh, hey hey, hey hey hey?. Again, the rest of the lyrics are extremely stupid- ?This is where I start to bite my nails, or clean my room if all else fails, I think its time for me to bail, this point of view is stale?. What was I saying about rhyming dictionaries again? How, um, deep. The rest of it is basically Avril whinging about how this (poor) bloke never made her feel special. So get a rampant rabbit like the rest of us and shut the hell up.

?How does it feel??

- If the song title makes you want to puke, wait til you hear the song. Its true Dawson?s Creek material this. It has that dreamy, acoustic and plodding feel to it. It?s definitely a twelve-year-old ?relationship? angst song. Again, the voice has been toyed with so it sounds like there are TWO Avrils singing at us (RUN FOR YOUR LIVES THEY?RE MULTIPLYING!) Much like every other song on this sodding album. The only way in which its different is it?s a lot more quiet, although the choruses are still verging on the slightly too loud side (although where Avril is concerned, the volume can never be low enough). ?I am small and the world is big? takes the biscuit for the stupidest comment to ever come out of this little woman?s mouth, even more stupid than ?your not the milk and cheerio?s in my spoon? from the first album. Aside from this classic, we have the crackers ?How does it feel? How does it feel? To be different from me? Are we the same?? which doesn?t make sense even
to people who speak pig Latin, and of course the wonderfully deep line ?ah, ah, ah, ah?.

?My happy ending?

- It takes the tired ?Under my Skin? theme of nu-metal backing with Alanis Morrissette singing over the top, and adds a new twist?oh wait no it doesn?t it?s the same bloody song arranged differently. I?ll give you three guesses what its about?a boi Avril lost. Boobloodyhoo. Another song, which involved Avril getting dumped. That makes a grand total of about a million songs she?s written about being dumped. Either she?s very pissed off at some poor bloke or the girl has been around the block more than the village bicycle (to paraphrase Austin Powers). The backing music is heavy, crunchy electric guitars in the choruses and clunky pianos in the verses. Its unimaginative and to be honest there?s not a lot to comment on, Except some startling effects used on Avril?s voice, causing her to sing stupidly high?I?d pay a million quid to see anyone but Mariah Carey sing that high live, especially a rather mid-alto such as Lavvy pants. Starting out with echoey drumming effects and rapidly descending into teeny-bop dirge with typically overdramatic lyrics ?Its not like we?re dead? (damn it), ?so much for my happy ending? (oh, life?s hard isn?t it honey), and *gasp*, a swear word! Naughty naughty. Bet she got grounded for that.

Nobody?s Home

-Just had to laugh when I heard this. Finally Avril has written a song about her own, pretty, empty little head. Sorry, had to say it. It?s a country-ish sounding, strummy acoustic track. Avril sounds like she has a head cold in this track. That?s about the most interesting thing I have to say about it. The song is sung entirely on acoustic guitar, which I?m willing to bet Lavvy isn?t singing. Its noticeable, however, that Avril?s voice sounds a lot more immature and weaker on this track, perhaps something to do with the lack of pretentious crunching guitars. Avrils voice isn?t particularly notable
in this track, apart from a few nice pitch changes. The lyrics are about a metaphorical girl with problems. Hmm. Wonder who Avril is talking about.
?Her feelings she hides. Her dreams she can't find. She's losing her mind. She's fallen behind. She can't find her place. She's losing her faith. She's fallen from grace. She's all over the place. Yeah, oh?
Essentially it?s the same old Avril, except she?s talking about someone else. Wow, how unself-centred. Oh wait, she?s PRETENDING to talk about someone else, whilst really whinging about herself. Now that sounds more like our Avril.

Forgotten

-Yes you will be in a few years sweetie. The opening reminds me of Evanescence, with eerie piano chords, and Avril?s voice backed by haunting girly singing. Of course, any trace of Evanescence disappears when you hear what the little Weevil is singing. To be fair I think this is my least disliked song on the album, perhaps because it strays a little from the Avril formula of wannabe-nu-metal and overrated girly ballads with a few extras. The song uses strings as a backing, and Avrils voice is low-pitched and growly, and the song changes tempo and tune quite often, which adds interest. It?s a lot heavier than her usual sounding tunes. The whole thing has the ?haunted mansion? feel of Evanescence, which I like just a wee bit. The lyrics aren?t much different from the usual fare; it?s just the music that?s a bit unusual for Bovril. It?s about a boi (sorry, is it getting annoying yet) who Avril has broken up with. Basically she?s calling him a coward. Isn?t THAT unusual for her. ?Have you forgotten everything that I wanted?? screams our self-centred little madam, ?Step up and be strong? wails our ?little badass?. ?I?m giving up on everything, because you messed me up?. Hmmm. Once again we have overdramatic teenage angst working against us. I think, with different lyrics, this could be a fabulous song. The strength of Avrils voice
and the composition of the music are pretty special, but its let down by the teenybopper lyrics. If you try and ignore the words, this isn?t a bad song.

Who Knows

-Oh good God she?s giving out advice. Kill her. Now. It makes a change from her ?I?ve just been dumped? scowl. I was beginning to think she?d have all her twelve-year-old fans self-harming. This is one of those be yourself and life?s not that bad song. Funny after what she?s been telling us for, oh, the last six or seven song. It?s an anthemic girly song that will no doubt will go down well in sleepovers. It starts with a mellow acoustic first verse and then bounces into a slow, but upbeat electric guitar based track. There are some ?cool? echoey drums and vocal effects used towards the end of the song that no doubt will keep the ?preps? that listen to Avrils album (that she so loathes) interested. Its shallow and stale, but at least it makes a change from the rest of the stuff on the album. The lyrics are naïve and again, a bit rhyming dictionary ?I think there?s something more, life?s worth living for?, ?There?s always a brand new day?, I?m gonna live my life like its my last day?, ?Find yourself, cos I can?t find you, be yourself, who are you?? Hmm. How uplifting Avril. Cheers, but I?ll stick to the Dalai Lama for my spiritual advice. A nice change from the rest of the album, but still pretty terrible.

Fall to Pieces

-The riff has clearly been pinched from an indie song, but I can?t quite place it. Annoying when that happens. It?s a soppy love song this, which makes a bit of a change from an Avril been dumped song, however not that much so because it looked from the lyrics as if she?s just about to be dumped, ?I don?t want to fall to pieces?, ?I just want to cry in front of you, I don?t want to talk about it, cause I?m in love with you? *puke*. A low-key acoustic track, which works itself up into a slightly louder ballad track. An echoing electric guitar works with th
e strumming acoustic (and if anyone can work out the tune the echoey guitar is playing please tell me, its driving me nuts). This one does even pretend rock, the backing track is pure pop, this type of backing track wouldn?t be out of place on a Britney album, except it has much less flair than a Britney song I don?t find any of Bovril?s songs particularly charming, but this one is particularly dry, dull and void of any sort of feeling. It doesn?t even annoy me its so boring, which I can?t decide if its a good thing or not.

Freak Out

-Oh dear. This ditches the embarrassing nu-metal instead it has a riff Justin from the Darkness would be proud of. This song truly has been beaten with the eighties-Bon-Jovi ballad stick. Eep. I am not joking you, minus the vocals; Aerosmith would probably release something like this (albeit in their ?I don?t wanna fall asleep? post eighties phase, but they never we particularly up with the times). Again, Avril?s voice sounds a bit immature on this one, she?s adopting that punk drone again, and it really doesn?t suit her, if you have a voice like that, you should show it off to its full advantage, not pretend to be something you aren?t?of course we all know Lavvy isn?t new to that. This one is one of the I-don?t-care-what-you-say-cos-I?m-a-hard-chick songs that was so popular on the last album, but seems to have been ditched in favour of too many oh-look-I?ve-been-dumped songs on this one. ?Try to tell me what I shouldn't do, you should know by now, I won't listen to you, Walk around with my hands in the air, 'Cause I don't care?. Aren?t you just proud of ickle Avril, taking her little badass steps into the big bad(ass) world? I?m not really too sure what is rebellious about holding your hands in the air, but for someone who wanted to be a policewoman (whilst calling herself punk in the same sentence) I?m not too surprised.

Slipped Away

-A piano-based I-miss-you song. Yep, Avril?s be
en dumped again. Aww. At least this one isn?t cursing his name, its more, ?Hey, I want you back?. Nobody in his or her right mind?ok I?ll shut up. Strings and some computerised effects are used, as well as a strumming acoustic and the piano. The choruses are grandiose and very ballad, with the staggered drumming, the high-pitched singing and wailing strings just scream eighties love song. Yuck. There?s far too much eighties nonsense on this album for my liking. If your going to do eighties you have to do it properly. Not that I can see Avril raiding Pixies riffs or anything, but you get my drift. Another boring track without much character. Most of Avril?s songs seem quite colourful, but this one, like ?Fall to Pieces? doesn?t really seem to have any heart at all in it. The lyrics are, again, alternately clichéd- ?I hope you can hear me, I remember it clearly, The day you slipped away, was the day, I found it won't be the same? and immature ?I miss you, Miss you so bad, I don't forget you, oh it's so sad?. I?m guessing the latter is Avril-penned unless the best two world-class songwriters could come up with is that. The world may be in big trouble if that?s the case.

I Always Get What I Want (bonus)

-Oh dear. Not Avril proving she is a spoiled brat, as we all know she is, but in fact, slagging off other people who have the cheek to be spoiled brats (because Bovril is the queen spoiled brat and NO-ONE should be peeing on her turf). At least I think she is. It?s hard to tell with her whether she?s being ironic or not. You don?t know whether to laugh with or at her, kinda like the Darkness. Another GreenDay riff is used, and the vocal tempo is very similar. Again, Avril?s stereotypical punk girl vocal is adopted. It?s extremely irritating. Approximately three chords are used, in true Pxnk Rawk style. The lyrics are bordering on ridiculous. From the nonsensical ?If I stomp my feet could that make me, Be the way around it? (now that?s some c
razy ass grammar), to the stereotypically arrogant mini-punk, ?So give me what I want, Cause I'm a big shot?, to the purely inane ?If I tell you I can't I'm still going to go, I did it all by myself, I found my way around it? (what a clever girl) and ?It's not too lovely
It could start to get ugly, It really bugs me?. Thanks Bovril, but twelve tracks is enough we don?t need a bonus.

Once again we have a wonderful effort from Avril. She?s managed to narrow her horizons considerably since the first album. She has apparently hit puberty and 90% of the songs are about boys-usually being dumped by them. This is opposed to the last album, in which about 60% were about boys and the remaining 40% about Avrils other favourite subject, herself. Growing up on the ?mean streets? (of suburban Canada) must be tough on those relationships. Again, the vast majority of the lyrics are shallow and stale, we have heard all before. Yes Avril, we know you don?t take any shit. We know you?re an individual. So stop taking advice from your manager and start acting like yourself, not a clone.

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