Horrible Holiday (Maspalomas)

Member Name: Leolover

Product:	Maspalomas
Date:	21/03/02 (1672 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: cheap, nice weather

Disadvantages: horrible food, full of loud, drunk, aggressive teenagers, German and English tourists separated

I went on a week long 'girls' holiday to Maspalomas in Gran Canaria in May 2000. I don't know if the area has improved since then, but I certainly wouldn't recommend it to anyone unless you're looking for a loud, booze fuelled, bar crawling type of holiday. It was a lager louts paradise of the worst kind.

*** ACCOMMODATION

We stayed in a resort a short bus ride away from the beach and the centre of town. The resort was strictly divided between English and German tourists. The Germans occupied one half of the chalets and the English the other. The meals and entertainment were also divided in this way. Germans and English ate at different times and at certain times the pool was sectioned off for games for the different nationalities. I thought this was awful. Why segregate people in this way? Surely part of the fun of going on holiday is to meet new people? I discovered that this kind of segregation was by no means restricted to our resort. Many other resorts all over the island were organised in a similar way. When I asked the resort staff why this was the case, I was informed that "The Germans don't like to mix with English people" a statement which I found extremely unlikely and offensive.

Apart from this, the accommodation was basic but clean. The pool was well maintained. There were never enough sunbeds, but that's usually a problem everywhere. The food at the resort was simple but acceptable. There were no native dishes, but I soon found that 'native food' doesn't actually exist in Gran Canaria, it's egg and chips or spagbol and that's pretty much it!


*** BEACHES

The beaches at Maspolomas were actually quite nice, if a bit crowded. Soft yellow sand and a pretty landscape of sand dunes to explore. You can hire sunbeds and umbrellas for a couple of quid at a time, and the sea was fairly calm and ideal for swimming. There are several beach cafes wher
e you can go for lunch or a snack, and a scattering of shops selling beach toys and ice cream, useful if you?ve got kids.

The weather in Gran Canaria is fabulous all year round, so you're pretty much guaranteed a tan!


*** ENTERTAINMENT

There are plenty of bars and clubs in Maspolomas, and not much else. They all have bizarre or cheesy names such as 'Linekers bar' and 'Paradise Bar'. At twenty three years old, I often felt like an old grandma out on the town, as most of the people frequenting the places were about eighteen years old. I realised the first night I was there that it wasn?t really my type of thing, and after the sixth time being chatted up by a pubescent paralytic virgin teenage boy it began to wear a bit thin! I decided to try and make the best of it, however, and managed to get into the spirit of things to a certain extent.

Drinks are not cheap ? there are lots of '2 for the price of 1' offers, but you'll pay about five quid and then find that both drinks are seriously watered down. Try to stick to bottles if you can, they're a bit more pricey, but you know where you are with them.

Avoid at all costs the club rep organised events. I couldn?t believe it when I signed up for one and found myself trawling the streets of the city with about thirty wasted teenagers screaming "Everywhere we go...people ask us...Who we are...And where we come from..." I felt like I was on some trashy cable reality TV show!

Unofficial segregation reared its ugly head again when it came to bars and clubs. There were 'German' bars and 'English' bars and we were 'not advised' to try straying from our designated area of entertainment. I witnessed several fights between drunken gangs of English and German men, and I'm sure the system I've described was partly to blame for this.


*** EATING OUT

Sadly, Gran Canaria is seri
ously lacking in decent places to eat. Everywhere is overpriced and the food leaves a lot to be desired. There was plenty of standard English fare, anything you ever wanted with chips, ribs, jacket potatoes and salad, but it was all very unimaginative and disappointing. As with so many other aspects of the island, restaurants were targeted at EITHER English or German tourists, with touts on each corner trying to lure holidaymakers of the desired nationality into their restaurants. I found it all very depressing and distasteful. I can't recall a single enjoyable meal during my weeks stay.


*** VALUE FOR MONEY

I paid £300 for my week long stay in a self catering chalet, which isn't bad if you?re looking for that type of boozy holiday in the sun. It may also be suitable for families with young children, as the beaches were lovely. If you're after a bit of culture, luxury or exploration, I would advise paying a bit more to go somewhere nicer. Perhaps it was just not my type of holiday, but I really wouldn't recommend it. Loud, cheap and crowded just about sums up my experience of the island.

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