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Toddler Taming - Dr. Christopher Green

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Genre: Health / Family / Lifestyle / Author: Dr. Christopher Green / Paperback / Book is published 1987 by Doubleday & Co

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      25.05.2013 22:49
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      Toddling taming bible, don't have a toddler without it

      Why I chose it
      I bought this book when my oldest was about 18 months at the strong recommendation of my best friend. Its headline is "A parents guide to the first four years" and it is worth its weight in gold!

      Author
      Written by Dr Christopher Green, he is one of the best known parenting authors, a pediatrician and honorary consultant to the children's hospital in Sydney, Australia.

      Price
      The one pictured is the revised version at £8.96 from amazon with free delivery, I remember paying full price for this book from WHSmith but now can be bought second hand for around £2. I gave my copy away last year to a "needy" friend as my children are now a little past naughty step age!

      The Book Specifications (as taken from Amazon)
      Paperback: 294 pages
      Publisher: Vermilion; Newly Revised and Expanded Edition, 1999 edition (5 Mar 1992)
      Language: English
      ISBN-10: 0091772583
      ISBN-13: 978-0091772581

      Why this book is so awesome
      This book is the bible of toddler taming. It is very well written, humorous, it covers what seems like every conceivable problem you come across with real ideas on how to overcome. Many of these techniques you see super nanny type shows using but it was here first!
      It walks you through controlled crying, naughty steps, sibling rivalry, toileting issues, eating disorders, "nasty habits in nice children", ailments, sleep disorders and the list goes on. All accompanied with a dose of wit and funny diagrams. Its very easy to read and you can quite literally just pull out the bits that are relevant to you. I can't tell you how well worn mine was after having three of the little darlings and it never ceased to provide solutions to new challenges.

      Im giving this book a DooYoo 5 star Rating, its a real parenting gem and it should be given out in Bounty packs!

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        24.02.2009 14:57
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        A must-read for parents. Choose the bits you like, ignore the bits you don't like.Overall: brilliant

        I first bought my precious copy of this book when my eldest child was around the 3 year old age mark: I imagine this is what most buyers of this book will have in common!

        The most important thing that the parent of a toddler is looking for, is reassurance that their situation is normal, and this book certainly gives you that: With great dry humour, Dr Christopher Green talks to you soothingly yet somewhat sarcastically from the pages of this book, like a more experienced, older friend.

        Actually, I wish I had heard of it earlier: 3 is a bit late for the 'toddler' in the title, I would recommend reading this during your first pregnancy :) in order to be fully prepared.

        Running to 324 pages in total, Dr Green doesn't miss anything or anyone out: He has split this masterpiece into 25 chapters, so you can either read it from start to finish, or just dip into it whenever and wherever you need to.

        You will either love or hate his manner: Personally, I love it, and sometimes would get this book out and start reading it in tears, and it would usually turn to laughter very fast.

        Some people may prefer being spoken to more 'softly softly' stylee, and may disapprove of many of Dr Green's recommendations. He may be judged 'too harsh' by some people, and for those people, I recommend Miriam Stoppard.

        This book was written in 1990, and my copy was bought in 2001, so I am not sure whether an updated version has been brought out: some of his methods might not be approved of today, for example he does advocate LIGHT smacking. In another example, tying the child's bedroom door shut to get them to stay in bed: even though I am a big fan of this book generally, those were a couple of examples that I chose not to use!

        On the plus side, I was also delighted to discover, that unlike many other so-called experts, Dr Green really doesn't shy away from anyone. He includes a chapter specifically about disabled children - some people may be shocked to discover that a lot of childcare books simply don't bother to at all, which I think is pretty outrageous. Similarly, he specialises in Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, and offers much help on that subject. In contrast, I have read many childcare books, and so many of them are worse than useless in the real world that I inhabit, only ever telling you how your children are going to be perfect angels, (hahaha).

        Practical advice is given confidently and straightforwardly, and sometimes there is an air of dog-training about it, I admit, however much of the help given is just old-fashioned common sense.

        He intersperses his writing with lots of funny anecdotes about his own experiences as both a paediatrician and a father: he isn't afraid to tell you about his own failings , which makes you feel good.

        One of my favourite sections entitled 'Non Problems that need no Discipline' includes some of the 'gems' that his patients have come to him with: Such as 'My toddler keeps taking chocolate from the fridge'

        Dr Green's response is 'Don't keep chocolate in the fridge' which made me laugh, and is a great antidote to the endless TV programmes which try to make a mountain out of a molehill with children's behaviour.

        There are also some really funny cartoons scattered through the book, and as well as the chapters, there are also 7 very useful lists and charts, giving you at-a-glance advice on matters like average height and weight, useful names and addresses, milestones etc.

        A must-read for any parent or parent-to-be.

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        13.01.2006 19:17
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        Well written book with lots of practical advise

        I was given this book way back in 1990, when my eldest son was just leaving babyhood. I thought the first 18 months were tough but nothing prepared me for toddlerhood; suddenly my child was questioning my every move and simple requests were met with a torrent of abuse! I put it all down to jealousy until I was given this book; once I started to read it, I realised that all of his behaviour was quite normal, and that I could look forward to it with child number two (wonderful!!).

        **What is Toddler Taming?**
        The book aims to demystify parenthood, and to boost parents' self confidence and make parenting as much fun as it can be!!
        The book is divided into 24 chapters, which I will list, to indicate the broad spectrum of topics covered:
        1. Confidence is the key
        2. What makes Toddlers Tick
        3. Behaviour: What is Normal?
        4. The Difficult child: Born or Made?
        5. Understanding Toddler Behaviour
        6. Introducing Discipline
        7. Discipline-making Life easier for Yourself
        8. The Techniques of Discipline
        9. Dealing with tantrums and Other tricks
        10. Toilet Training
        11. Sleep Problems- the Answers
        12. What should Toddlers eat?
        13. Feeding Without Fights
        14. Nasty Habits in Nice Children
        15. Fears, Comforts and Security
        16. Sibling Rivalry
        17. The Hyperactive Child
        18. Playgroups, Nurseries and Early learning
        19. Working Mother-Effective Parent
        20. In Praise of Grandparents
        21. One-Parent Families
        22. Tension in Families- Spare the Children
        23. The Disabled Child: Behaviour and Discipline
        24. Common Toddler Illnesses

        There is also an appendix, covering miscellaneous milestones and facts, recommended immunisation, heights and weights and useful names and addresses.

        Although the book looks quite weighty, each of the chapters is divided into smaller sub sections, some of which are one paragraph, and there are amusing illustrations throughout. This makes it a really easy book to read either in one go (would any one with a toddler have the time?) or as a reference book, scanning through various chapters as needed.

        There is a lot of wise advise in this book to help you to get your child through the first four years of life without going mad. What came out of this for me was the fact that you are not alone (almost every child has "challenging" behaviour at some time) and that this period of their life ends at about four and a half…I knew there was hope!!

        The book is obviously too long to go through chapter by chapter, but I want to share some of the main ideas I picked up along the way…

        ** Age of Unrest**
        Toddler tantrums are extremely distressing and are a normal part of development, as a child suddenly has a sense of himself and his/her own free will; he is still unable to control situations and so starts to see a sense of unfairness (the start of teenage angst!!)
        Whilst I was beginning to think that the change in behaviour was my fault, Green suggests that bad behaviour is almost always attention seeking and if they can't get it by fair means, they will resort to any underhand tactics to get that attention they so crave. Green goes on to offer possible solutions to try to modify this behaviour and indeed, throughout the book, when he offers a possible reason he does suggest some ways to modify your own behaviour or gives some ideas of "what to do next". One of the main things he suggests is to give the toddler some responsibility so that he has a sense of justice and to try to limit the offence when he or she is not able to make the choice (It's time for bed now…not a choice!!)

        **Sleep**
        Quite a major issue in our household; we seem to have children who were not naughty at bedtime but who just did not need a lot of sleep. Green gives a lot of ideas to make bedtime easier and for me it was encouraging to find an expert who was not telling me to put my child to bed, close the door, and let them cry themselves to sleep. He takes the best bits of a few ideas and gives a method which promises a 90% chance of cure within a week…it did actually work for us.

        **Keep those tummies full**
        "Food is the fuel that powers our young children".
        Great- again, a realistic approach. Green suggests we stop making food an issue and don't allow it to become a battle. He takes the guilt away from parents who can't get their children to eat their vegetables, and children who will NOT drink a glass of milk (I have had both types). He advocates that we lead by example and that if children are growing, happy and healthy, then we have little to worry about.

        **Discipline**
        One of the most difficult areas and a chapter to which I frequently turned-isn't every new mum wanting to "do it right"? Green advocates positive parenting to discipline children, and it became quite simple for me to follow: praise good and ignore minor bad behaviour; don't pick fights over issues which can be handled differently; be firm when you need to be. He suggests that toddlers respond well to boundaries because it gives them a sense of safety, but the discipline should not impose too many rules or we will stifle independent thought.

        **Poorly Children**
        Another well thumbed chapter. The chapter deals with most of the common medical problems we may at some time see in children, with a quick description of the symptoms. However, there is again a sensible and laid back approach, when he states that as they grow up the child "goes through a whole series of illnesses, each one apparently more ghastly than the one before".
        He does have a sub section: when to panic, and it's a comment which made me smile because it's so true… "When mum is worried, I worry. When mum is worried and grandma is worried, I worry a lot!" Great stuff. It's an acceptance that parents know their own children better than anyone…very positive!

        **Verdict**
        I think this book is almost indispensable for anyone with young children; I certainly gained a lot of information from it, and I had done child development as part of me degree. Thought I was quite the expert until I had my own children then realised I knew NOTHING!! This book is like sitting with a friendly family member who knows a lot and is always ready to listen and make suggestions. The tone of the book is not patronising and always there is the feeling that parents and grandparents know best "Grandmas and grandpas are some of our most valuable and least utilised natural resources".
        Whenever something concerned me, it seemed that there was indeed a subsection to help me out. If I wanted to take the advise I could, if not, it could be discarded. However, there was advice out there, and because the issues troubling me were in the book, I knew that I was not alone.
        Now with two teenager, I wonder if someone could write a book on Teenager Training, to help me through this stage which is worse than toddler because they are just as self centred and attention seeking but bigger. At least there are no sleep problems!!

        I
        Great book for reference and just for feeling better about your ability as a parent!

        **Publisher**
        Vermilion

        **ISBN**
        0 09 177258 3

        Thanks for reading!!

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          16.08.2005 14:19
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          A really useful book for use during the terror years!

          As any new Mum (or Dad) would agree, your little 'angels' first temper tantrum is terrifying. In fact the next three years are set to be pretty trying too! I think I bought every book and listened to every well meaning old lady during this time. It has taken me this long though to realise I'm actually better off listening to my own instincts and ignoring every one else. However this book gave me the confidence to come to that conclusion myself!

          For instance I used to feel really awful giving my son a dummy, I really hate the things but my son still had one at three. This book also agrees that they are hideous but Green puts a humerous slant on what can become a huge issue saying 'Personally I hate dummies - I think they make children look stupid - but if you have a child who is irritable and you put a dummy in her mouth and it pacifies her, then you can give her two dummies for all I care!' I then stopped worrying so much and by the time he was four he no longer had one. Thankfully my youngest doesn't like dummies anyway so I've side stepped the issue this time!

          The book is really easy to read and Green never pretends to have magic answers. Its funny how parents look to Health Visitors for magic 'pills' to stop all these delightful behaviours when in fact it is the parents that are making the problems! I did have a giggle reading one of the pages. Its about not disciplining children when there is actually no problem. One example is about a child taking chocolate from the fridge, Green suggests not putting it in there in the first place. Whilst this is an obvious soloution and will work, I think maybe some of the advice is a bit patronising even if it does make a good point. I'm really not that stupid.... honest!

          I think Oliver was about 2 when I bought this book in despair. I got it in a local book shop and paid about £8 but the RRP is £12.99. talk about praying on desperation! Its not really worth that price so check on ebay! It is quite a large book, just over A5 size with 350 pages of fairly big print with scattered funny sketches by Roger Roberts. It was first published in 1984 but I have a nwer updated version published in 2001 by Vermillion.

          Dr Christopher Green is a paediatrician in a hospital in Australia and has worked with parents for over 20 years so he should know his stuff!

          The book covers a wide range of topics including: potty training, sleep, working mums, single parent and step families and discipline. The index is really easy to use and so you can quickly find what you need. At the back there is a section on toddler illnesses and vaccinations, heights and a home safety checklist

          The discipline sits nicely in todays society where we need to keep our children under control but cannot smack. Green advises to use time out and ignoring which really does work! I'm actually sick to death of hearing old ladies coming up to me in the middle of the supermarket tantrum and either telling me to smack or be nice to my kids when frankly neither work in that situation!

          It is a nice book to give new Mums as a gift but you cannot take on board all the advice after all we know our own children best. I just use it now as a starting point and take it from there. I wouldn't say this book is a must have but it is certainly useful at times. The only odd thing is listening to a man, I know that is a bit sexist but I do feel better taking advice on children from another woman. I expect Dads would welcome a male point of view though! Its worth investing if you can get it cheaper.

          Good luck taming your terrors! xx

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            18.09.2003 16:29
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            I must confess that I am lucky enough to have children with good temperaments. The only thing that did concern me about my two year old was her anti-social behaviour. I mentioned it to my health visitor and was assured that this was quite normal behaviour for a toddler. She did, however, recommend that I have a read of a book called Toddler Taming by Dr Christopher Green. I originally tried to borrow it from the library, but they didn't have it in at the time, so I decided to buy it instead. I have heard rumours that Amazon is a good place for low prices on books, so that's where I went to see if they had it. They had several editions of Toddler Taming and being the cheapskate that I am, I opted for the cheapest. It wasn?t until it was delivered that I discovered it was the Pocket Edition; the full title being "Toddler Taming Tips". It seems that this edition is aimed at "parents with less time on their hands". As incredibly useful as this edition is, I was pleased when the library got the latest full edition (New Toddler Taming) in. It has a lot more detail and in some places makes more sense than the Pocket Edition does. Dr Green is a paediatrician who currently lives in Australia. He has two children himself, which in itself is promising. Something that can be really annoying for parents is having bad advice given to them from someone who has never had children themselves. I have a friend who is a childrens' nurse. She often used to be asked by the parents she doled out advice to, whether she had children herself. Her reply would be: "No, but I have over 10 years of experience working with children and that's just as good." Now she has her own child and realises that there is no substitute for raising your own children. Dr Green has an amusing little disclaimer at the beginning of the book, that he has never actually succeeded in 'taming' a toddler. However, for over 20 years h
            e has been helping parents with his advice on babies, toddlers and young children. The advice given in this book is what he has worked on over time with the help of parents who have come to see him. He would encourage parents try out different solutions to toddler behavioural problems and the techniques which worked were kept and those that didn't were discarded. So the advice and techniques given in this book are truly tried and tested. This book also describes different toddler behaviour types, so what ever your toddler is like you will probably find her described in here. It can be refreshing to know that if someone on the other side of the world can describe your child then she has got to be normal. From my own personal experience, the advice Dr Green offers really does work. As well behaved as my toddler usually is in the daytime, when it comes to night she isn't so great. She was over two years old before she started sleeping through the night. She wouldn?t go to sleep initially unless I rocked her in my arms, meaning that when the sleep cycle brought her near to waking she found herself in a different environment and needed cuddling back to sleep. This was actually before I read Toddler Taming and it was my health visitor who suggested I try Dr Green's Controlled Crying Technique. It didn't work as quickly for me as it did for her with her own children, but I persisted and after a few weeks it got much better. My daughter was able to go to sleep by herself and I didn't need to get up to her quite so often. When the time came to transfer her from a cot to a bed, she created a new problem. She would keep getting out and leaving her room. By this time I had Toddler Taming and was able to get advice from the book. Again, I didn't get an immediate result. It took a few weeks and when the new baby arrived we had to start all over again, but it did work. I have found myself using a lot of the advice I have got from this book
            , everything from dealing with tantrums to sibling rivalry. Sometimes the techniques worked very quickly and other times they took a bit longer, but I have yet to come across a problem that I was unable to solve using the advice from Toddler Taming. The key seems to be persistence and when you come to realise the reasons why toddlers behave and react the way they do then it is much easier to deal with them. Dr Green points out that the main thing toddlers want is attention. This is why good behaviour should be rewarded and bad behaviour ignored; although this is often easier said than done. That is why he suggests 'time out' when things escalate. This concept is not fully explained in the Pocket Edition, which is why I personally prefer the full edition. Another thing which isn't really touched on in the Pocket Edition is that a child's behaviour and temperament is largely hereditary and only partly due to the environment she is raised in. Of course the only thing the parent has control over is the environment. This must be a relief for the parents of particularly unruly toddlers to know. Too often, people blame a child's bad behaviour on bad parenting. Most likely, though, a hyperactive toddler will have a hyperactive parent. I'm sure you?ve heard the phrase "like father, like son"! Dr Green has a very non-judgemental approach. He doesn't agree with dummies or smacking, but is aware that some people use these. So if a dummy gets Mum and Dad a bit of peace then he will say use one. He doesn't think that smacking is necessary, but feels that if a parent does believe in smacking, they should only use it as a last resort. He even gives advice on when and when not to smack. He also realises that what is a problem for one family may be quite normal for another family and doesn't presume to tell anyone how to raise their child. Besides offering advice on behavioural problems you might encounter, the book als
            o gives advice on coping with more specialised situations such as single parenting and handling separation and divorce in a way so as to cause the least stress on the children. It also has a chapter on toilet training, which has sound enough advice, but I have to say I didn't find it quite as useful as a leaflet I got from my health visitor. The only other thing that I feel could go against this book is the fact that he tends to speak his mind. Personally I find this quite refreshing, although some people may get offended by it, especially if they realise that they are the type of person he is talking about. Before you start thinking that Toddler Taming is just boring facts and advice, I'd better dispel that fear. This has got to be the funniest factual book on children I have ever read. Just a few hours before giving birth to my second child, this book had me rolling with laughter. He has included some wonderful anecdotes about his own and other parents' experiences. The book is also illustrated with amusing little cartoons. My daughter was particularly enamoured with the picture on the front of New Toddler Taming. She often tells me about the "Boy putting cat in toilet!" As Dr Christopher Green says: "Children are fun, enjoy them now" and this book will help you to enjoy those stressful toddler years; unless of course you have been blessed with an angel and wonder what all the fuss is about! Toddler Taming is published by Vermilion. The recommended retail price is £5.99 for Toddler Taming Tips and £12.99 for New Toddler Taming. Also available from Dr Christopher Green Babies!, Beyond Toddlerdom (which will be my next purchase!) and Overcoming ADHD. ~#~ Caradawn ~#~

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              22.10.2002 03:27

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              Thank you, Dr Green - Advantages: Practical, In touch with reality - Disadvantages: None

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              25.12.2001 05:23
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              Consultant paediatrician Christopher Green has written a classic work on coping with infants. This book is a must for all of us new parents who have wondered how our chubby baby who used to gurgle happily for a few months can suddenly turn into a bellowing, tantrum prone, heel-drumming carpet biting misogynist that we call a toddler. What went wrong? Whose fault is it? What can we do about it? My parents used Dr Spock as a reference book to help gain reassurance when I was a toddler. "Toddler taming" is the up-dated reference that I need to reassure myself now. My son is fast approaching the stage where he is causing me to ask questions about my own sanity. Now, on reading this, I realise that it is not me but my son who is learning his limits and this book is invaluable in giving me tips on how to cope. Dr Green has calmed some fears I have that his behaviour is not abnormal. He points out the inevitable strains of bringing him up, and gives me practical advice on several fronts from discipline to sleeping problems, tantrums to toilet training. Toddler taming is written in a lighthearted manner that is easy to read but it is authoritative enough to inspire confidence. Each section is easily referenced so individual concerns can be found easily and read quickly. I know parenting should come naturally. I know that prescriptive parenting manuals appear sad and that I as a doctor should have all the answers. At 3 am it is very different though. All sane thought has gone out of the window. When it is your own son each tantrum appears to be a sign of hyperactivity, autism or major internal derangement. You would not believe how reassuring it is to read that this is normal and not the sign of impending doom. I do not expect those of you who don?t have children to understand the mixture of emotions that I am feeling as a father. After all I did not fully understand how it felt to be a worried parent until I became one. Chr
              istopher Green has captured this strange mix of bewilderment, worry and wonderment and written the ultimate guide mapping out the next few years in the most reassuring manner. After reading the relevant section I can relax a little and realise that my son is only doing what comes naturally to him. He is normal and will turn out a well-rounded individual. The relief that that gives you is immense. I wish becoming a parent did come with a list of instructions or a help menu, but it doesn't. "Toddler taming" is the best manual you can get. Of course there are aspects of child development that the book does not cover. Examples may be summed up in the age of development milestones. Dr Green works on the premise that most children will develop normally and he avoids discussions about the age your child should smile etc. This is to allay even more fears and there are other NHS books that cover that. He advises in a practical way on how to deal with those catastrophes that are embarrassing and concerning. The book also is not a definitive psychiatric guide to the first 5 years. It is a practical easily read reference to common problems and for this I am thankful because at 3 am I don't care about rarities, I want an easy life. Well written, sound advice for the most worrying yet most wonderful time in your life, this book is a must for all new parents. Priced £9.99 from most bookstores, supermarkets and mother care stores it is amazingly cheap for the reassurance it gives you. I hope, as we are a generation of Spock babies that children born now will become a generation of Green babies and they will have relaxed and happy parents who are happy that what they did was wonderful, right and a contribution to the happiness of there families.

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                14.12.2001 04:01
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                If you are going to invest in a childcare book make sure that you choose this one. ‘Toddler Taming’ is written by Dr Christopher Green and published by Vermilion. At £12-99 it makes a good investment that should help to guide you through the first four years of your child’s life. Not only is it full of sound advice but it is also packed with humorous anecdotes reminding you that other parents have suffered and survived the same troubles as you. Dr Green is a well-known parenting author, a paediatrician who is honary consultant to the Children’s Hospital, Sydney. But more importantly than his academic qualifications, Dr Green is a parent! All too often experts bombard us with advice when in actual fact they have never been in the situation themselves. I remember as a teacher, doling out advice to parents of children in my class on parents evening – now that I have a son of my own I cringe at my earlier idealistic views. At last an ‘expert’ who has actually been there and practised what he preaches, such a refreshing change. Everything about this book is refreshing though. Dr Green’s approach is sensible rather than clinical. In his introduction he states that the important things in child care are love, consistency, example, tension free homes and sensible expectations. He then goes on to remind parents that “Children are fun – enjoy them now!” And he is so right. Many articles that I have read relating to toddlers seem to dwell on the negatives rather than the positives. I believe that society imposes expectations on these little people that are quite ridiculous at times and as parents we feel failures if our children do not meet these. I personally bought this book because my son has a sleep problem. I call it a ‘problem’ as that is what the health visitor describes it as. He will not settle on his own and wakes in the night regularly. The only w
                ay that we can get him back to sleep is to put him into our bed. I have spent months having night time battles and have tried every method going. The controlled crying method does not work for him despite me sticking to it for periods stretching over hours! So I admit that I have totally given up in my battle with him – he has won. He now nods off in his pushchair, we carry him to his cot and then when he wakes in the night we put him into our bed. We have been dong this for a couple of weeks and it is wonderful – I have had some decent sleep for the first time in over a year. In fact I now have a social life too as I feel good enough to go out with friends rather than being tucked up at 8:30pm. My sense of stress has also diminished as I know that he will go back to sleep when he is put into our bed. Although Dr Green does not advocate my method in anyway – he does state that your child only has a sleep problem if it is causing you a problem. This way of thinking has opened my own eyes to parenting. The reason that I was so stressed about Joe not sleeping in his own cot all night was that I didn’t think that what he was doing was socially acceptable. Parents are encouraged to put children in their own cot and I felt embarrassed as if I had failed. I still keep it quiet that Joe sleeps with us as I think people may think that I am lazy for not working on the issue. The thing is I have worked on it until it has literally made me ill from lack of sleep, at the moment we all sleep well and I am so grateful for this. Dr Green’s approach is basically that what suits one family would not suit another and how right he is. His words of wisdom have meant that I have taken a more sensible approach to Joe’s sleeping habits and I now firmly believe that there will come a time when it is appropriate to address the issue if it continues although at the moment the arrangement suits everyone. ‘Toddler Taming’ h
                as recently been republished and is now entitled ‘New Toddler Taming’, ensure that you get the latest edition as there have been further additions since earlier editions. This edition has 25 chapters covering everything from behavioural problems to sibling rivalry. Dr Green gives a simplistic overview of behavioural development, which helps the parent to understand the psychological development that their child is going through, very important if you are to attempt to understand their behaviour. Dr Green’s honesty when writing makes you chuckle out loud, particularly if you have a child yourself you are able to fully relate to what he is describing. Throughout every chapter he remains incredibly positive encouraging you as a parent to have confidence in your parenting abilities and reminding you to enjoy your child. When it comes to behaviour management, Dr Green offers sound advice. I think that speaking from my own point of view I am a little highly strung about Joe’s behaviour – he is only 13 months! We all want to be good parents and to produce ‘good’ children but it is very difficult to know when to start disciplining your child. As Dr Green states it is up to parents to protect their children, “not to punish them for lack of maturity”. He therefore states quite clearly that at age 1 children have no sense, at 18 months almost none and at 2 some sense but they need careful watching. When you put things in these terms it makes your think more clearly about whether your child is being intentionally defiant or whether it is just an understandable lack of maturity. Having said all of this, Dr Green does believe in good discipling of children and offers suggestions relating on how to do this in the invaluable chapter entitled ‘Discipline – Making Life Easier For You’. He focuses on your reaction rather than the child’s behaviour and reminds you as a parent not to nitpic
                k and to remain positive. He offers advice on keeping discipline consistent and structuring routines. He also points out possible triggers and states how to toddler proof the home. While the book focuses on positive reinforcement as a means of behaviour management, Dr Green does also view smacking children as being beneficial in certain circumstances. He admits that there is no right or wrong way to manage your child’s behaviour as each child and each family are so very different. I found the chapter “Dealing with Tantrums and Other Tricks” very useful. Although Joe is still very young he recently started to throw tantrums on a very regular basis. In fact some days were just one long tantrum! After reading this chapter I decided to follow Dr Green’s advice and didn’t cause a fuss but merely moved away until he had finished. This seemed to ignite the situation as he was horrified that I dare to leave him writhing about on the carpet but just as suddenly as they arrived the tantrums stopped – for now! I found it quite reassuring to read stories from parents that he had seen in his clinic as they make you realise that millions of parents have been in exactly the same situation and survived. The Appendices at the back of the book offers some useful information that will be of interest to parents. There is a section entitled ‘Meaningful Milestones’ which state what children should be doing at different developmental stages. There is also a list of things that you should be concerned if your child isn’t achieving them. There are average height and weight charts and a list of facts about Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). A very good home safety checklist is included which takes you through each area of your home asking you questions relating to the safety provisions that you have made. This is the kind of book that you can read cover to cover or simply dip into when yo
                u need a little advice. It has a detailed index page which helps you to locate the information that you need quickly. I have used it much more than I thought that I would, there is an excellent section on common childhood illness which offers advice. There are numerous names and addresses of useful organisations for parents too. Dr Green covers every subject that may concern a parent in today’s modern society. His message is reassuring and positive, you are not a failure as a parent just a success waiting to happen! The book is well worth reading simply for the anecdotes included which had me laughing out loud. My attitude has changed for the better thanks to this book which is an excellent resource. Should you wish to purchase the book the ISBN number is 0-09-187528-5 although I was able to buy a copy from the local WH Smith, directly from the shelf. Oh and remember to enjoy your child while you tame them! Thanks for reading.

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                  25.11.2001 04:16
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                  These are the words I heard a mother use to her three year old in the supermarket the other day! The little tykes crime?? To put in the shopping basket some sweets that he had been told repeatedly he couldn’t have. Needless to say he then proceeded to scream and whine and rant and rave until the poor mother agreed – mummy 0 toddler 1. How many times whilst out shopping do you see this happening? Ever wanted a book that would completely change your life and that of your tantruming toddler? Well here it is folks, not exactly a new book on the scene, but has been updated for today’s little hellions! Toddler Taming by Dr Christopher Green is the most essential book for every parent, with children aged 1- 5. I firmly believe it should be given out at birth instead of the ridiculous book they do give you that tells you how wonderful your baby/ toddler will be. Do not be deceived by their adorable looks, when babies hit toddlerdom they are a force to be reckoned with – worst of all THEY KNOW IT!! So who is this Dr Green that will change your toddlers behaviour with words, he is Consultant Paediatrictian and head of Child Development Unit of the Royal Alexandra Hospital for Children in Sydney. Not only does he have an impressive array of letters after his name – he also has the benefit of experience with his own two sons, all too often you will get ‘expert’ advice from someone who has never been a 24 hour parent. So what is so special about the book - well in a nutshell it offers PRACTICAL advice. It understands your problems, and I haven’t found a problem that hasn’t been covered …..YET! The techniques used to ‘tame’ your toddler are easy to put into practice and reassure you that you are not being too hard/soft on your child. Some Chapters included in the book are: ~ Confidence is the trick – the most effective weapon you hav
                  e against your willful bundle of joy is confidence, once they see that waver they have cracked your code and the safe is theirs for the raiding. There is a little section about some myths – all of them blown into outerspace as most certainly incorrect for example ‘working mothers do great harm to their children’. The chapter does emphasize the foundation for a happy secure childhood is laid down by love, consistency, good example, reasonable expectations, fun and enjoyment and confidence. A child who is brought up in a tense and violent atmosphere where parents are shouting and swearing at each other daily, is not going to be a particularly happy child. A child who swears and rants at his mother and is not chastised in anyway is going to be confused when he does the same with his father and is punished. ~ What makes toddlers tick? You will laugh and cry in the section, it is so accurate it is untrue. You gain a good insight into perhaps WHY little Jimmy does the things that he does, and start to avoid such situations or remedy them. Perhaps your toddler rants and raves in the supermarket that he wants some sweets you can either give in and avoid the embarrassing outburst and listen to the tuts of stronger willed parents and the ching of the dentists till, say no and mean no and have your child rant and rave around the shop, again listening to the tuts of other shoppers or you can leave your child with a relative whilst out shopping. I know my preferred method and shopping is a much more enjoyable experience. Once your child knows that a firm ‘no’ means exactly that, they know where they stand. ~Behaviour – what is normal? This chapter will most certainly reassure the majority of parents that their child is completely ‘normal’ and that the tantrums they are experiencing happens to everyone! All toddlers crave attention and will find a way to get it! All toddlers tend to be stubborn and wi
                  llful, All toddlers show little respect for other people property, are completely blind to the chaos they create and change their minds every minute. It is all too easy to say but very hard not to compare your child to someone else’s, try not to – your child is an individual, it is up to you to mould that individuality. I fall in the camp that says that no child is born ‘bad’ they are only made bad by their environment. Watch your child at play and listen to the phrases they use – they are the ones that you use in daily life. If she/he hears daddy/ mummy swearing all the time – chances are he will do the same. ~Understanding toddler behaviour This Dr could make a fortune if he could write a book about what makes men and women tick and was as accurate about it as he is a toddler! If you have a bad day, chances are your little treasure will also have a bad day, this could be due to the fact your stress and tension is passed on, or everything they do seems 10 times worse because you are tired/angry/upset. As you can see the book firstly examines the ‘whys’ of the behaviour of toddlers rather than just telling you ‘how’ to deal with things, it does then go on to deal with ‘how’ to deal with things such as tantrums, poor sleeping patterns, poor feeding habits, sibling rivalry as well as an excellent section on coping with a disabled child. My whole family have benefited from reading Toddler Taming, and have a much more relaxed attitude towards looking after James, as a result his behaviour seems to have improved in many ways. One of the main things I have taken from the book is that when something happens that in the past I might have perceived as ‘naughtiness’ – tipping out the toy box in temper, pouring a drink on the floor in temper or something similar, there are three words I say to myself (never never out loud) ‘Does it matter
                  ’. Ok so it might look messy when the toy box is tipped out, but rather than ranting and raving, I just walk into the kitchen and do something in there – now that didn’t get the reaction that James wanted, so perhaps he will try and do something a little bit more naughty like pour his drink on the floor, again, does it really matter, ok the carpet is a little bit wet, but soon dried with a cloth, again no reaction. James soon gets fed up with getting no reaction and goes and switches the kettle on (good behaviour) and gets praised for it. I have implemented some of the techniques mentioned in the book with excellent results. One of the main problems we had was James getting up in the middle of the night and getting into my bed – ok not the worst problem in the world, but then again he is a very fidgety sleeper and the bruises I received from his feet were not particularly nice!! After 5 nights of taking him back to his own bed, quietly and calmly, he now stays there ALL night long unless he has a bad dream of course. The result is a better rested much happier mummy!! So you see it isn’t all waffle, but good no nonsense easy to implement advice. Although I really do praise the book to the rooftops, I don’t always agree with some of the methods it suggests to calm and control behaviour. However it does give a good insight into some methods that can be used and you can adapt them, as we have done to a way that suits your ideals. The book also has useful appendices including ‘meaningful milestones’ what your child should be doing at what ages, recommended childhood immunisations, heights and weights for 1 – 4 year olds and some helpful names and addresses. So any stressed out parents/grandparents/aunts/uncles anyone who deals with children, rush over to Amazon or go to any good bookstore and order your copy now, priced at £9.99 it really is within everyone̵
                  7;s budget. It really is an awesome book that will change your attitude to your children. Even after all this time I still reach for it in moments of extreme stress, usually when I have had a bad day to give myself the extra boost I need to maintain the work we have put into helping make James who he is. The book is very easy to read and I found myself skipping to the relevant parts, for example tantrums, poor sleeping in a desperate bid to resolve everything in one go – please don’t do this, the book deserves to be read from start to finish in that order. It is such an easy book to read, and an enjoyable one at that, with many an amusing anecdote or case history to entertain as well as inform.

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                    21.09.2001 18:02
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                    Ever wondered why your happy, gurgling, cute little baby turns into the child from hell, almost overnight? Why suddenly everything you do or don't do is wrong, and greeted with shouts, screams, stamping feet and sulks? When Thomas was 14 months, so did we… And then our Health Visitor recommended this book: 'Toddler Taming - A Parents' Guide to the First Four Years' by Dr. Christopher Green. One trip to Hammicks later, and everything began to fall back into perspective. It's a brilliant book. It does not offer you miracle cures for the so-called Terrible Twos - frankly because there aren't any! (These don't necessarily begin at 2 by the way, so watch out!) It does, however, provide sensible approaches to the difficult behaviours, which, faced with every day, you tend to get too involved in to rationalise. Dr. Green writes with enthusiasm and realism about his subject, and with a great deal of humour. He ensures that you realise that your child's behaviour (mostly) is normal and that you are not the only parent to struggle some days. Most importantly of all he helps you to equip yourself with ways of dealing with problems as they arise. Dr. Green is very practical and understanding of family life. He knows the pressures of parenting and does not bombard you with a list of don'ts. He sees the broad picture from both the parent and child's point of view. It is clear that he genuinely likes children, and reminds the reader that even very small children have rights - for example, the right to choose not to eat if they are not hungry. I mention this because most of our problems with Thomas have been to do with eating - well, not eating really! Consequently, this is the section of the book I have referred to most. Of course children won't starve themselves and of course they will eat when they are ready, it's obvious. But, when battling with a child three times a day every day, you become obli
                    vious to the obvious! This book helps you to regain your sanity, your sense of priority (Thomas can go for days on Cheerios, cheese and raisins - at least he's eating something!) and as a result, improve your relationship with your child. With subjects ranging from self induced vomiting (yuck) to starting playschool, there is something in this book for everyone. Okay, so you may try the techniques and they may not work, but at least you've had a humorous, interesting, easy read along the way. If you've got a toddler who's giving you grief - buy it! If you've got a perfect, smiley baby - buy it in preparation for what's to come! Some further details: Price - £9.99 Publisher - Vermilion ISBN - 0-09-177258-3 Subjects covered include - Understanding toddler behaviour; Dealing with tantrums; Techniques of discipline; Sleep; Eating; Toilet training; Special needs and illnesses.

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                      25.08.2001 05:14
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                      I acquired this book when my 18 month old started to show signs of what I always thought was the 'terrible twos'. I am reliably informed now though that this stage can start as early as 12 months (that makes me feel a bit better!). She had started to: scream, bite, pinch, have tantrums in supermarkets, not eat, refuse to sleep etc........ Basically, I was at my wits end. My perfect little baby had turned into a monster! I turned to this book for advice. I found this book extremely helpful. This guy has obviously had experience of dealing with toddlers - so many books like this are written by people who have learnt the theory but never in a million years tried to apply it. The book was full of practical advice, quite a lot of which I have been able to apply successfully. It was also reassuring in it's advice about toddlers who don't eat properly at meal times, encouraging you not to worry but to give them healthy snacks throughout the day. Advice was also available on how to encourage them to eat properly, which has worked in our case. The book was easy to read and laid out in clear sections. I was able to skim through it quite quickly, missing out the bits I did not need to know (or not at the moment anyway) and concentrating on solutions to problems I am encountering right now. I imagine it is the kind of book I will dip in and out of over the next few years when certain problems arise and I need some advice. Some of the sections I found particularly useful at the moment were: How to deal with : eating problems sleeping problems antisocial behaviour tantrums in public The author does recommend smacking, which I am still trying to avoid, so that could be a bit off putting if you do not agree with smacking. But otherwise I would recommend you read this, if you are a parent, or at least have a copy to hand for those desperat
                      e situations. It will at least make you feel that your child is not the only little horror around! Publisher: Vermilion Price: £9.99 (£7.99 at Amazon.co.uk) ISBN: 0091772583

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                        02.05.2001 21:19
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                        This book, ‘Toddler Taming’, is a must for any parent of a toddler. Honestly! It has such good, practical advice in it and covers a wide range of topics, such as introducing discipline, toilet training, eating habits, and, of course tantrums! It also has useful sections on disabled children, working mothers, one-parent families, and the role of grandparents. I originally bought it to try and sort out my daughters sleep problems, but I've found it really useful for loads of other things as well. The author, Dr Christopher Green, really seems to know his stuff! He is a consultant pediatrician in Australia, and also lectures in Pediatric Medicine at the University of Sydney. He has lived and worked in the UK as well, and has two sons of his own, so has presumably put his advice into practice! The reason I like this book so much is that it takes a sort of middle-of-the-road approach. The methods described in it are neither to strict and disciplinarian, nor too soft. It strikes a good balance, which is what you need to aim for with children, I think. At nearly 300 pages, Toddler Taming is a fairly big book, but you can just dip into it and look up what is relevant at the time. The chapters have sections and sub-sections so it is easy to find what you are looking for and read appropriate parts. Although written some years ago this book is still, in my opinion, one of the best books around on childcare for children in the 1 - 4 years age group. All us parents should all have a copy on our bookshelf!

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                          27.11.2000 17:04
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                          Toddler Taming is a brilliant child Care book. I used it on all of my children, not much good on the first child as I didn't find it early enough and I was on my way to insanity by then. Next 3 kids were taught well by using the BOOK. It has a commonsense and amusing air to it and is easily readable. You can just dip in to a specific topic or read a chapter at a time. Thanks for reminding me about this book I must hunt it down to give to a friend of mine with a biting toddler, JAWS we call him. I know, I'm naughty to label a child so early in its life but if he had bitten you, I am sure you'd call him something.... wouldn't you? suella

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                            08.11.2000 19:20
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                            That what this book should be. It was lent to me by the health visitor & now I've bought my own copy. Christopher Greene writes in such a way as to make this book thoroughtly readable and enjoyable. He manages to make you laugh when you could be bawling. He also admits that the professionals often get it wrong and that you really need to have kids before you start advising on how to bring them up. In each section he shows you the options for "taming" your child if you are having trouble - options other than beating hell out of it until it submits or having a 3ft terrorist. It made me feel as if I could be getting it right at the moment and that someone else agrees with my version of discipline. After all we're not all "natural" parents.

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                            09.10.2000 16:31
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                            My GP recommended this book to me and I only bought it when my 2nd baby boy was due and the toddler would be in his toddler prime. My toddler is actually a good little boy, no real problems but with a new baby coming along I was not entirely convinced that he would remain that easy going, so I got the book via Amazon.co.uk which came up to be more expensive than if I would have just bought it at Mothercare (posting and packaging's fault) - I am not bitter at all about that, just thought I would mention it! Having read that book before my toddler's brother arrived prepared me for the worst and also helped me a lot to understand what he would be going through. When the baby finally arrived and my eldest son started having mega tantrums and bad attitude with me, I was glad I read it before the 'war' and I think that it gave me a much better approach in dealing with the lad. It made me more confident about the way I was handling things - and it reminded me to see his point of view - I might have done it without the book but a new-born baby can easily take over everything in our lives and with this book in mind I definitely made extra efforts to consider my eldest boy's feelings at all times. Sometimes it is just comforting to know that his behavioural extremes are really no different to the average toddler! Dr Green's ways are very practical and very much based on common sense and logic - things that we don't have anymore when provoked by a tantrumy toddler. This book is so well written and funny that it kind of sticks in your mind. It is very easy to read, I really enjoyed it and think it should be put into the maternity's bounty packs which are in my opinion geared towards first time mothers only and woefully inadequate for second time parents who face a whole new variety of challenges.

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