The Great Shopping Trolley Caper (Tesco)

Member Name: marandina

Product:	Tesco
Date:	04/03/02 (991 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Convenient and huge range of brands

Disadvantages: Relatively expensive

OK KH, here goes. So there I was walking down the concourse towards my local Tesco. Earlier on I’d slipped a secret camera into my trolley a la Sam Cadman from Trigger Happy TV. The notion was to capture people’s behaviour whilst surfing the aisles in Tesco. It’s a respectable 8pm although this store is a 24 hour jobbie where your night shift waller can shop to his/her own schedule.

So I sachet in through the glass doors. This Tesco is typical of many with it’s bright red and blue corporate banner housed in a sort of brick triangle housed at the front of the store. All Tesco’s seem to be designed the same way with a kind of homely feel to the front of the building.

We’re in and on my left is a post-box together with 3 ATMs just in case you’d come out without any dosheroonie. On my right is the customer service desk, which deals with customers taking stuff back, complaints and lottery tickets. Okey dokey, time to slide over to the help desk and ask for the manager.

"Can I speak to the manager, please?" I demand with a stern expression.

The young girl of no more than 16 disappears to go and fetch him/her. A few minutes later a young man sporting a badge proclaiming him as the store manager turns up (matches his piccie in the gallery on the wall behind the customer service desk).

"How can I help you, sir?" he asks in a well-drilled, customer friendly manner.

"Can you give me a bit of history about Tesco, please? I’m doing an opinion for a consumer website called Dooyoo."

He kinda looks at me gone out for a moment and then his induction course all those years ago comes flooding back.

"Tesco was founded in 1924. Over the last 78 years the company has grown and developed, responding to new opportunities and pioneering many innovations. Today it is Britain’s leading food retailer.

The founder of Tesco wa
s Sir Jack Cohen. He used his gratuity from his Army service in the First World War to start selling groceries in London’s East End markets in 1919.

The brand name of Tesco first appeared on packets of tea in the 1920s. The first store to be opened was in 1929 in Burnt Oak, Edgware.

In 2000 Tesco.com covering all Tesco e-commerce business for customers, was launched. Tesco Direct the grocery homeshopping service was launched and is now the largest grocery homeshopping business in the world.

In 2001Tesco announced a strategic relationship with American supermarket Safeway Inc to take the Tesco.com homeshopping model to the US."

"Thankyou." I reply and walk off towards the trolleys. The young manager casts a disdainful look at my exit and returns to his paperwork.

Now here’s a choice of chariot. We have the fully-fledged power model, which takes the bulk volume of shopping. There is a more petite version for yer lighter shopper and then there is the hand basket for yer casual, few items only shopper. I go for the power model.

So now I’m in the mix. On my left is the Cafeteria. Quite cheap for food and serves all manner of goodies such as all day fry ups, fully fledged meat and 2 veggie jobs, coffees, teas and the like. It’s hardly the Ritz but it’s nice for those who want to chill after an arduous shop or even those that want to catch their breath before battle commences.

I’ve already passed the trolley loaded up with a basket of typical goodies proclaiming to be cheaper than Sainsbury’s as usual.

Straight-ahead is the newspaper and magazine aisle. Hmmm…shall we go for The Times or save money on a comic and buy The Sun? We have all manner of publications on sales from "The Weekly Fisherman" to "Spiderman – The Adventure Continues".

OK, we’ll leave the papers and press on. We’re now in
the pharmaceutical section. Tesco competes with Boots etc and has been instrumental in getting the price of off the shelf drugs like Aspirin reduced significantly over the years. We have an extensive range of tampons on sale along with other daily essentials from shampoo to toothpaste. No need at the moment but we’re out of toilet roll (different section).

Right, now we’re in the clothing section. Tesco cater for all genders – adults, male and female, children and babies. Prices are competitive and I like the look of that Levi jacket for £39.99. Hey, we’ve missed a section! Too the left we have the CDs, birthday cards, computer software, stationary section. CD’s are reasonably cheap although the range isn’t that extensive.

The camera’s on so what’s it picking up? Aha…a typical man desperate to jump onto the back of his shopping trolley and motor down the aisle. He won’t because his wife’s (I assume) hunting around the shelves for items to tick off her list. If he does he’ll get short shrift and a clip round the ear (we are oppressed lads).

Take a right and we’re into fresh produce. Loads to go at here. We’re under orders to pick up a butternut squash for the tortoise and some more bananas. Every time I pick bananas up I think of the stories I’ve read about folks coming across Tarantulas that have made the journey from deepest South America in one of the crates. As I’m something of an arachnophobe, I pick up the latest bunch with almost tweezer like precision. Does it conform to EU standards for shape and shade? We don’t care as a bunch goes into the trolley. Moving on we brush a rather tall chappie on the way past. Hey that’s no bloke it’s a flippin’ giraffe mooching around the greens. He’s followed closely by a fella (I’m sure I’ve seen this crew somewhere before) with a hippo in his trolley. Well it ta
kes all sorts!

Oh no...a gang of little old ladies blocks our way. These blue rinsers look like battle hardened souls and it’s hard to see how we can bypass ‘em without trouble. I break out in a cold sweat at the thought of their sharp elbows that could almost have been used in spy work instead of poison tipped umbrellas. Phew, they’re splitting up so I nip past them. It’s strange but an unwritten law of the supermarket is that you mustn’t touch someone else’s trolley. If this does happen then there’s a ritual dance of apology that would put the aftermath of a car prang to shame.

Ah, I’m getting bored now. We’re in the heart of the aisles. Time to get a wiggle on and get the list done. Rows of aisles marketing beans, frozen meat, pizzas, toilet rolls all neatly stacked and stocked up mean it’s rare to encounter a situation where the item you want is out of stock. If it is then Tesco promise to let you have it next time by giving you a ticket which you can request from any of the staff. This is particularly useful when they are doing their special offers e.g. 3 for the price of 2 and so on. I mean, if you’re anything like me then you’re always there too late.

Nirvana has arrived. We’re in the booze aisles and what a wonderful choice! We have all sorts of wines – red, white, rose et al. We also have teen spirit i.e. whisky, gin, port and all those sorts of things and a well-stocked beer section. You have to say that Tesco push the boat out when it comes to drink and the choice of different lagers and beers is second to none. There are decent wines from upwards of £2.49 befitting of any occasion.

Hey, one of the staff is whispering that they are being kept here against their will. I’m no fool...I’ve seen that Dom Jolly sketch in Trigger Happy TV. I’m offski.

Oh, the camera’s blinking again. It’s picking up a mom
struggling with her kids. She has one in the cart and 2 on reconnaissance duties or at least they think they are as they are jumping all over the shelves. She’s looking pretty stressed so we’ll move on quickly.

Final destination today is the nibbles aisle. Lots of choice of stuff to go with a glass of wine and a video (or DVD if you are so equipped). We like the Bombay mix but alternatives are Kettle chips with suitable dip or even microwaveable popcorn for the kids.

Hmmm...should we pay a visit to the various outlets at the bottom of the store? We have a curry counter next to the Chinese counter selling ready-made oriental and Indian meals for warming up when you get home. We have a counter selling fresh fish (phew) and a fresh salad bar that’s worth a visit from time to time. Then there’s the Delicatessen serving up cheese and the like. Don’t use this one too often but if you’re interested you need to take a ticket and wait your turn. How can I forget the freshly cooked and roasted chicken counter? Mouth-watering – really must give it a go one-day.

At last, time to check out. Glancing down there’s not much in the basket so we’ll see if there’s a fast checkout. There’s a visual promise to put an extra cashier on if there is more than one person waiting. Seems reasonable, as we can’t see more than one person being served and one waiting. Aha…the 10 items or less till. You can tell it is as everyone’s counting the number of items in each other’s basket. Hey, any more than 10 and you’re gonna get lynched!

The wait’s not bad and we’re on our way out past the film developing counter where you can also get your ciggies or cigars. Blimey, the girl on the checkout can only have been 15 or so. Controversial stuff as Tesco pay bottom dollar to keep their wage bill down (cashiers anyway…dunno about management types). Will anyone
else notice or be prepared to pay more? Dunno again but there’s rumours that you’ll be checking your own stuff out at the checkout in future depriving these needy teenagers of a much needed cash injection.

Well we scraped in with the "Computers for schools" voucher where you get vouchers to give to your local school who save ‘em up and exchange ‘em for computers when they’ve got enough. We also claimed our 1% discount through the *Clubcard scheme. This gives you a rebate via quarterly vouchers, which can be redeemed at the tills equating to a 1% reduction. You have to register your personal info with Tesco, which they use to assess their product offerings. Of course, you have the write to bail out of any future maildrops by ticking the privacy box on the application form. There’s also a key scheme which gives you an alternative in the form of deals with certain attractions e.g. money off at a day out at Alton Towers.

Definitely time to go and we’re heading towards the roadster. We’re parked in a typically ample Tesco car park with plenty of trolley bays close at hand. You won’t need to walk far to dump your trolley (although many just leave it in a place where you have to get out of your car first and move it before you can park).

The camera’s taken lots of film to take in later so would we recommend Tesco? Well, we preferred Asda in Brum but there are no Asda’s for miles down here. Tesco seems relatively expensive although the choice of brands is comprehensive and the range of double blue lined goods is great for those on a budget.

We like Tesco ‘cos it’s convenient and nearby. If only there was an Asda to compare it too.

Of course, you could spare your pet giraffe’s hooves and avoid the great shopping trolley caper by ordering online though the online arm of Tesco. At only £5 per order more and more are.

Thanks for re
ading.

Now you know why I don’t write in the shopping category, KH!

*From 15th March Air Mile vouchers are available through the Clubcard scheme. Each £2.50 worth of Clubcard vouchers can be exchanged for 80 Air Miles. You can also earn Clubcard points at the petrol station and the Tesco credit card carries a 1 Clubcard point for every £2 spent.

Details of branch addresses and details can be found at www.tesco.com including opening hours of individual branches.

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