Great times. (Baby Stages in general)

Member Name: MaryanneH

Product:	Baby Stages in general
Date:	22/07/04 (327 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: I loved every stage, if you do it differently, thats ok too

Disadvantages: None

As some of you may have gathered from my previous ops I have 2 girls, Emily is 7 and Ellen is 5, so having come across this category I thought I would share my experiences (or bore you completely) with you with each stage of babyhood.

As a first time mum, way back in the mists of time I read every baby book I could get my hands on. This can work either way on one hand it can reassure you and help you to get everything organised ? what you need for the nursery, my baby is now as big as a crushed strawberry, that sort of thing. Or it can make you completely paranoid ? Oh my God the morning sickness should have stopped by now, or every little thing can send you into a frenzy, so whilst this is pre baby stage my advise here is read it, if you must but take a sensible view of it. These books are written primarily to guide you through the stages and as such can help but they can also encourage you to buy so many things that you really don?t need. For example the number of books that suggest you get a cot bumper to protect baby?s head if it rolls and keep baby warm, the hospital then tell you don?t use them because the baby is in danger of getting too hot, which can cause cot death. I know who I chose to believe and my bumper is still in its wrapping, unused, and the windows were always slightly ajar even in winter.

When the baby is first born and you are allowed to take them home (in my case 2 months later but that?s another story) then the fun really starts. The first stage is the sleepless nights, now these have quite bad press but can be a great time to spend some quiet time with your new baby. With Emily I had to bottle feed because she was so small that she had to have supplements in her milk, so you do have to get up and turn on lights and things to warm bottles etc so by this time whilst you may not be fully awake, you are certainly not asleep. I used this
time to curl up while she was feeding, occasionally reading a book or even ended up watching a film one morning because it is really is easier to sleep when they do. Mother Nature does give you extra hormones to cope with the lack of sleep ? but I always found getting hubby to get up worked just as well. Soon baby will settle down into a pattern that helps you to cope ? give a late night feed before you go to bed then with any luck you can have a good 4 or 5 hours before the next one. Breast feeding gives more scope for relaxing while you are doing it, so you don?t even have to turn the lights on. Ellen was in our room for the first 3 or 4 months and I breast fed her so I just plonked her on and waited for her to finish, without really having to wake up to any degree on consciousness. If your baby is not sleeping for regular intervals over night ie waking every 1-2 hours have a word with your health visitor because it could mean that they are not feeding enough, or are too windy.

One of my other poor value for money purchases was the bouncy chair ? now I know a lot of people use these all the time, to good effect but both my girls preferred lying on the play mat with a few toys around, and they would both sleep there quite happily. Emily has never needed a lot of sleep and being so small she crawled really early and she would frequently be crawling along the floor then suddenly just stop and have a nap.

The next stage in baby development is weaning ? I love this stage and believe me I did it very differently the second time around. By this time they can hold their heads up and smile, so they have no problem expressing emotion when you put something in their mouth that they do not like!!! In the early stages I used the car seat to do this in but later they naturally move into a high chair (booster seats are good value as well) They start off by just taking a few spoonfuls
of baby rice every day, this stuff smells disgusting but is fairly tasteless. Then they are allowed proper stuff, mushed up fruit banana, apple, pear. There are plenty of jars available, but I only ever used these if we were going out as they are expensive and there are always articals about too much sugar, salt, additives etc. So if you give them home prepared stuff at least you know whats in it. First time around I did as the books suggested and prepared food a week at a time, froze it in ice cube trays and served it up a couple at a time, this was fine for small appetite Emily, when guzzle guts Ellen came along she very quickly progressed to needing far too many ice cubes so I completely changed my tactics.

The first two months of weaning are the most restrictive with the foods you can give as you must avoid dairy and starches as giving these too early can cause lactose or wheat intolerance. Once they hit 6 months as long as you don?t use salt, nuts or shellfish the sky is the limit. We tend to eat mainly fresh ingredients anyway and very rarely use jars or packet stuff so with Emily I was still preparing ice cubes but with Ellen I made good use of my hand held blender and she had whatever we did. So much easier. For both of my girls using potato as a base and mixing in a variety of vegetables worked a treat as it is cheap and you can prepare it at the same time as your own meals.

From a development point of view everything from 6 months is a series of firsts ? first tooth (usually around 6 months but Emily was way past her first birthday!) First crawl, not all babies do this Ellen was about average at 7.5 months but Emily was mobile by 5 months. Because Emily was so light (2lb 9.5 born and only just weighed a stone by her first birthday) she could pull herself along by her arms commando style at 4.5 months and because she was 2 months premature t
he Health visitor kept taking 2 months off all her milestones so officially she crawled at 3 months ? ridiculous!!! This did cause a few problems for me as she removed all the videos from the cabinet to use them as a step so she could play with the stereo at 5 months old ? I bought a cupboard lock that afternoon. Walking usually comes in at around the first birthday.

Potty training is the other big one the advise here is don't rush it - one little tip that worked for a friend of mine is put a pair of real pants on first then a pull up nappy, that way they know they are wet but you don't have the problem of cleaning the carpet!

These milestones whilst very important in your babies life are another cause for complete paranoia for a parent ? why has joe bloggs crawled, and walked the trapeze before his first birthday whilst representing the uk in the swimming Olympics on the weekend? You must remember that they are averages for a reason ? some babies are quicker and some are slower otherwise you wouldn?t have an average and we would all be the same ? wouldn?t that be boring. It also goes between siblings Emily and Ellen are very different characters Emily is really sporty and picks up educational things really quickly, Ellen is the next mother Theresa and educationally is slower but far more accurate because she has to think more. Emily could sing happy birthday perfectly pitched by the time she was 2, I was convinced Ellen was tone deaf like her Dad but is now showing real talent for the violin and makes a really nice noise out of it ? which believe me is no easy thing!

When your children start mixing with others the paranoia can really set in, and yours will pass on to the kid! one of Emilys friends mum was talking to me in the playground the other week, and all she ever hears about from Sara her daughter is how well Emily swims and this was re
ally worrying her but when Sara came round to play she was such a delight to have around, helped in the kitchen in a way I would never let Emily do without having the ambulance parked outside, and as I pointed out to the mum Emily swims because it was important to us that she could and she has been every week, without fail since she was 4 months old. Different families have different habits and the children will progress quicker with the things that they are more familiar with.

I know I have rambled on a little with this review, but I do not feel that it would be complete without adding a little of my experience with the development of special care babies. Premature babies are given extra time to hit their milestones (as I mentioned Emily had an extra 2 months) this is because they are assumed to be completing what they should have done inside up to their due date. The reality can be very different to the extreme. We were very lucky with Emily as all that was wrong with her was an underdeveloped liver, so she started developing normally on the quick side of average. In the other extreme the prematurity can be as a result of a disability in this case the milestones will be very fluid but if they are ill to start with and then recover fully you must remember that the development will be impaired as they are not going to walk at the normal time because they spent the early stages of their life not being allowed to move so have to work on the muscle development. Having been in special care I have friends who have found that whilst the motor skills were delayed the mental skills, talking etc were quicker because of having more time spent with them.

The most important advise I can give about baby stages is relax and enjoy them all, all babies are different and believe me, every parent feels the same sense of nervousness and anxiety when they don?t know what to do ? trust your
instincts they are usually right where your kids are concerned.

Thank you for reading

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