Children - How do/do you entertain yours? (Being a Parent)

Member Name: buckhysen

Product:	Being a Parent
Date:	04/02/09 (101 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Keep children active, busy and entertained to give the family an easier life

Disadvantages: Sitting kids in front of the TV/Games console/etc only makes family life more difficult

As a single Dad I know exactly how hard it is bringing up kids on your own, and how tiring and draining it can be.
Before I start this review my situation is a little different in the fact that I actually found it easier being a single parent than when I was with my ex partner.... I won't go into too much detail but basically she had severe mental health problems and was also an alcoholic, so once she left I found it easier having only two young girls to bring up and look after instead of three. Which is basically what my ex was after she became ill, another child.

I don't wish to sound uncaring towards any single parent (It is very hard and tiring) and I certainly don't claim to be perfect (I make as many parenting mistakes as anyone else) But I do think that a lot of parents (Not just single) do make life very difficult for themselves with regards to how their children can behave.

Again, I'm not talking about everyone but at the same time I am noticing a similar pattern with more and more parents as I get older. Especially my friends and family.

Chatting to friends (Male and female) not too long ago we were mostly of the opinion that Women are far more tolerant of noise from their kids as Men. Whether this is an accurate summary is up for debate but what I have found with almost every single Mother I know is that when their children are making lots of noise and running around, women are far more likely to talk over it, carry on as normal and almost ignore it..... Whereas Dad's seem more likely to shout and tell the kids to be quiet.

I'm not saying either way is right or wrong it is just something I've noticed, especially since becoming a single Dad. Personally I think as long as the children are not harmed then what is right for you and the family as a whole is 100% the correct way to do things. It is different for everyone.

But... and here's the point of this review. The one thing which I see more and more of from parents, and what I think causes a lot of problems (When parents have problems with their kids) is this attitude 'Oh, go and watch the telly', 'Go away I'm watching this', etc, etc.
Now don't get me wrong I've done this myself on occasion but it seems to me more and more parents these day seem to encourage their kids to go and watch TV, play upstairs, play on the games console, or whatever it is rather than take them out or sit and play with them.

I know I might get a bit of stick for this and as I've said I know there are lots of parents out there who do a LOT of things with their kids, but I do think their are equally, if not more parents who seem quite happy to let their kids get on with their own devices, they don't ask about their day, they don't know where they are, etc.

As an example... both my daughters have a friend each who seem to knock on our door at any time of the day or night, they are allowed to walk anywhere they like and play anywhere they like and stay out for hours upon end yet their parents don't seem to know or care where they are.
Although we live in a nice area it is built up and certainly not a place for kids under 12 to roam the streets and play. There are parks and greens in the area but still across big main roads and not ideal for kids this young to be walking the streets on their own.

I don't let my two go out to play in the street like most parents seem to in this area, I just think it's too dangerous, but to make up for this we often go out places, we go bowling, visit friends, go for a meal, beer gardens in the summer, picnics out, etc, etc.
Yet I know very few parents who do the same, certainly not as often as we do anyway.

I find when we go and visit friends their kids are either in their room, playing on a games machine or watching TV or they are out and the parents don't have a clue where they are. Which I do find surprising in this day and age.
Don't get me wrong, we often sit and watch TV or act silly on the Wii, but I think that is a huge difference every once in a while compared to fobbing them off to the TV/Games console several hours a day while you watch TV or browse the net.

I find it amazing when I chat to some friends who say 'My kids are driving me mad', 'They are never good'. 'They are always bored' yet the parents never take them out or seem to spend any time with them, it just seems to be easier to put them in front of the TV or games console.
One of my best friend's (Female) asked me at the weekend 'How come your girls are so well behaved and polite?' and I simply think it's because I am always doing things with them and trying to teach them right from wrong.

As I said, I am nowhere near the perfect parent, I make mistakes and I lose my rag with my girls sometimes, But I do think that to make the best of things and prevent your kids from being bored, teach them right from wrong, teach them the value of doing something with their life instead of causing trouble, etc then you have to spend time talking to them, taking them out, etc.

This may sound like a bit of a dig at parents or a rant even, which it is certainly not. It's just what I have noticed more and more from spending time with other parents over the past few years.
Just think about this..... How many families do you know that don't even sit and eat tea/dinner together? I think at least half of parents I know never sit down and eat at the table together and talk..... They either all sit and watch TV or have meals at different times or worse still the children just won't sit/settle and won't eat what's put in front of them.
It's almost like a role reversal where the children control the adults.

I guess at the end of the day it all comes down to standards. Personally I think you have to put a lot of effort and time into talking and playing/going out with your children but to compensate you also need time to yourself and to do your own things.

I am lucky that my parents have my two girls most weekends, so I do get some time to myself to either go out with friends or relax at home. I think everyone needs a break from their kids at times to recharge the batteries, but I also think that when you do have your children with NO break (Which I do sometimes) then it makes sense to keep them entertained, take them out and basically wear them out with a smile on their face, rather than sit them in front of the TV/Games console and ignore them..... and for anyone thinking parents don't do this, believe me... they do!

Before I finish, this is not me having a go at anyone, this certainly isn't a rant... if it comes across that way it is simply my writing style, I'd just be interested to hear everyone's comments and whether they have seen similar patterns with their friends or other parents when out and about.

Summary: An easier family life can be had with just a bit more get up and go... and above all, thought!