Hospital Births, not all that easy (Hospital Births)

Member Name: playmate

Product:	Hospital Births
Date:	16/10/08 (160 review reads)
Rating:

Advantages: Professional care if needed

Disadvantages: Horrible, shocking attitude

My best friend has three children at the moment, 2 boys and 1 girl. She is now a single mum. After giving her loads of help with the first two children, and helping her out with some money issues in the past, when she found out she was pregnant with her third child, she immediately asked me to be one of her birthing partners. The reason; She wanted me to know how much all my help had meant to her in the past and felt that this was a really good way of showing it. When she asked me I broke down in tears, it meant so much to be there not just for her but also for the whole experience, it's not everyday that you would let someone come in when you are in the strangest positions in the world trying to give birth. I was really touched to say the least.

As soon as Kelly had asked me, I said yes. I went straight into my work the next day and told them what the plan was, so they had plenty of warning, and my work was more than happy to allow this.

I was also there for Kelly's first scan, and she was given her date of 17th of September. It was really weird to see this small shape on the screen and to think that it was going to turn out to be a beautiful baby.

Through out Kelly's pregnancy she had a lot of problems, and always had to be admitted for tests, and I was always there right by her side. One of the doctors that she saw nearer to the end of her pregnancy really wasn't very good or very helpful. She was in a lot of pain and was really worried about the baby, but he didn't reassure her that everything was fine, or didn't even explain to her why she was in pain. We later found out that because it she was on her third child, her pelvis had opened up slightly more than it should have and this was causing a lot of pain or discomfort.

The 17th of September came and went and still no sign of the baby, it was really funny to see her pregnant again, as this time she was absolutely huge. She was even trying all the old wives tales of eating a whole pineapple etc, but to no avail. On the 20th of September Kelly went for a check up to make sure that everything was alright, and they then decided to give her a 'sweep' to see if this would help her waters break, and that night I got a phone call at midnight telling me that she was in labour but was waiting it out at home until it was really necessary to go in. I was just waking up to go to my work when I got a telephone call at 5.45am telling me that she was in the labour ward and I needed to get there really quickly. So I chucked on any clothes and ran out the door. It always seems that getting somewhere that normally takes 2 minutes last a lifetime and it did.

When I arrived at the hospital the baby's dad was also there, but he looked petrified. He was only 18 so did really know what to expect, but even though I have never been through it before, instinct took over and I was like a machine getting her anything that she needs, holding her hand and wiping her face with a cool cloth. When we arrived the shift was due to change, and the first midwife we had was really helpful and was telling Kelly everything that was happening and everything that she was going to do. Then the shift changed and Kelly was given a new midwife, who was really nasty to her. It came near the time that they needed to check how far dilated she was and the midwife never even checked if she was having a contraction at the time. So when she checked it caused Kelly a lot of pain and discomfort, Kelly was in tears.

She had also asked for a drink of water, and was refused for no reason at all. Then the midwife wasn't happy that they had to break Kelly's waters for her as the baby was distressed. She moaned that the waters had splashed on her clean new outfit that she had just put on at the start of her shift, well I'm sorry but if you're a midwife your going to get messy!

When the baby was finally born, he was taken away to be checked, no-one told Kelly or me what was happening, and we were really worried that he wasn't going to survive. After 15 minutes he was brought back to her but there was still no explanation on why he was taken away. I then had to find the senior staff nurse to get details, and it ended up that he wasn't breathing properly and needed some oxygen.

Kelly had been given diamorphine just before the birth for the pain, and she was very drowsy so couldn't feed baby properly. I offered to do it for her. The midwife brought us a bottle of milk then disappeared. She returned about 2 minutes later and started shouting at me, saying 'you do know that your not meant to be feeding the baby that much'. I have never had a baby before let alone fed one that was about an hour old, and Kelly was so tired that she kept nodding off. I immediately replied with the comment 'no because there was no-one her to tell me, if you had been in the room then there wouldn't have been a problem'. After that she then changed her tune as was trying to be really nice.

The after care that Kelly received was the best part of the whole experience. I was really keen for Kelly to put a complaint in about that midwife but she decided not too bother as she had enough on her plate with looking after the new baby plus her other two. If I had my choice that midwife would have been taken out of her job and reprimanded.

I still however think that hospital births are much safer than home births, as you always have a professional there with the right equipment there when and if you need them, whether or not they act like it.

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